Chapter 29 #3
"Yes, you know, our mercurial chief of police, Beck Goldman. Who isn't as strait-laced as he pretends to be? Objectively, the worst choice out of the three of us?"
Sweat prickled the back of my neck, my insides twisted with spiraling anxiety, but I knew my face showed none of that. Jonah cataloged my every micro expression, trying to glean something out of the silence.
Adelaide had three partners, and they somehow made it work. I never in a million years thought Ray or Jonah would agree to the arrangement. Here they were, fighting for me. My lies stacked up into a precarious tower, and I placed one more on the top.
It wobbled, wobbled, and held.
I don't want to put anyone else in danger. My mind was on Jenny and Bernice. Free for now, unabducted unlike Tessa, but Ellington sent me photos of them periodically.
"I didn't choose anyone but myself."
Whatever you feel for me will turn to hate soon enough.
Lying never hurt so much before. Jonah, Beck, and Ray, together with Adelaide, had brought me back to life.
I didn't realize how robotic I'd become working with The Unseen, and it was only away from their icy grasp that I realized how dead I'd been inside.
Lying had been a way of life until one last untruth broke me.
Now all the good I'd experienced, like falling in love and building friendships, rotted on the vine.
Lies flowed out so easily, coated with sharp barbs.
Even when I wanted to tell the truth, I couldn't, not with so many lives hinging on my silence, including my own.
I swayed and caught myself on the brick wall.
I hadn't eaten breakfast, being unable to stomach anything lately.
How could I? After everything I was hiding from the people who meant the most.
Jonah's jaw clenched, and Ray let out a mocking laugh, but it faded when I added nothing else.
"How do you explain this?" Ray jerked his head at Jonah, who pulled out his phone and showed me a picture of me and Connall. Sitting in the car only moments earlier, with our heads close together.
My blood turned to ice, and I snatched the phone and deleted it. If Beck saw this photo, he would be immediately suspicious.
"What the fuck? Are you following me?"
Ray's focus dropped to my necklace, and he shrugged. A chill rolled through me, and I folded my arms over my chest.
"You avoid us, don't reply to our messages. We deserve an explanation."
I fingered the necklace with a frown on my brow. "I know it hurts to have a girl say no, but I don't owe you anything."
"Maybe we weren't official," Jonah grimaced at the word. "But what we had went beyond casual, and you know it."
My heart ached. Hot pokers lined my ribs, enough to scar. I wanted to smooth his pursed lips and tell him I agreed. What we had was once in a lifetime.
"Are you having me followed?"
"Not exactly." Ray shook his head.
Jonah sighed. "The necklace has a tracker, Lara."
I clasped it in my hand as I smothered an outraged gasp. The chain bit into the back of my neck as I pulled it tight.
"You are out of your mind. How often have you been using this?"
"It was for emergencies only," Ray pouted, shooting Jonah a glare.
"Following me with another man?"
"Have you been unwell? You look… different." Ray changed the subject, narrowing his gaze. Jonah hummed in agreement. The two of them looked at ease with each other. I wondered whether my rejection brought them closer.
"So, I tell you I'm not interested, and you insult my appearance?" My nose wrinkled.
A young lady walked past, tripping on the hem of her skirt, and Ray used the distraction to pin me to the wall.
He ignored my furious protests, running his hands down my body.
The tight athleisure hid little, and I flushed as he lingered on my protruding ribs.
Stress was eating me away, and I hated how they could see the evidence of my duplicity on my body.
"Something isn't right," he muttered, motioning for Jonah to touch me as well. "And I don't believe you're not interested. When I find your date, I'll make sure he never calls you again."
Jonah's large hand ran down my side, gentle and possessive all at once.
"The ego you have is astounding," I hissed.
Their touch and presumption came too close to the truth. I shoved my hands onto Ray's chest and sent him stumbling back toward the road.
"Don't touch me without my goddamn permission, got it?"
Jonah rubbed his chin, thoughtful and not one iota of regret. Ray held out his hands but stalked right back into my bubble.
"We are going to have a conversation, all of us, soon. Understand?"
My eyes widened in surprise before I shrugged. A car with custom exhaust crawled past us, and Ray gave it an appreciative look.
"I said everything already. Leave me alone, I mean it."
I slipped past them both, weaving through the small crowd. My legs pounded in my haste to put space between my lies and my heart.
I was a coward and a liar.
How was I meant to tell them I was in love?
It would only hurt more when they found out the truth.