CHAPTER TEN | London
CHAPTER TEN
London
“Hey!” I hear someone call out as I make my way up the dock. Turning, I see a familiar face jogging toward me.
“Hi.” I don’t say until he reaches me, clenching the ledger I’m holding against my chest.
“You ran off so fast earlier, I didn’t have a chance to say hello.” Travis smiles, the action lighting up his whole face.
I’m immediately reminded of my initial thoughts when I first met him a couple of weeks ago, that if he weren’t covered in dirt and fish guts, he’d be rather good-looking, and I stand by that assessment today.
Not that today is the first time I’ve seen him since then.
Rather, I’ve seen him nearly every day that I’ve worked.
“Sorry about that. I’ve been a bit preoccupied, I guess.” Understatement of the century. “Did you need something?”
“No. Just thought I’d say hi.”
“Well, hi.” I wave awkwardly, instantly regretting the action.
“Hi.” He rocks back on his heels.
“Well, if that’s all you needed.” I point toward the small office just barely visible from our vantage point. “I should get back to work.”
“Do you like coffee?” he asks abruptly as I start to turn.
“Doesn’t everyone?” I say, though in truth, I don’t actually like coffee at all.
“Would you maybe want to grab a coffee with me? I mean, if you have time.”
“Oh... I...”
“Not like a date or anything. Just two coworkers, grabbing a coffee.”
I smile at how nervous he seems.
I should say no. I know I should. But something about the way he smiles at me has me hesitating to turn him down.
“Just coffee?” I ask, not entirely convinced that’s his intention but also not wanting to give myself too much credit. For all I know, he could have zero interest in me that way.
The way he smiles says otherwise.
“Just coffee.”
“Well, I don’t get off until four today. Think that might be a little late for coffee.”
“Don’t you get a break or something?”
“I mean, I do. But I don’t usually take it until eleven. Don’t you need to go home and get some sleep or something?” I ask, knowing for a fact that he was out on a night fish last night and didn’t get in until about an hour ago.
“I’ll sleep tonight. I’m off for the next four days anyway.”
“Wow. How did you manage that?”
“By working eleven days in a row.”
“In that case, sounds like you’ve earned the break.”
“So, about that coffee.” He brings me right back to the topic at hand.
I shouldn’t. I really, really shouldn’t. I’ve already poked the bear that is Penn Kade. Going out, even if just for coffee, with one of his employees might set him off completely. Then again, he might not care even a little bit and again, I’m just overestimating my importance.
Besides, if he can rub Cat in my face, what harm is going out for a cup of coffee?
“Where?”
He smiles again, knowing he’s got me.
“Avery’s diner. Since you’re local, I assume you know it.”
“I do.”
“Eleven fifteen? Should give you time to get over there.”
“Eleven fifteen it is.” I nod, turning without another word.
“See you then, London,” he calls to my back and even though it feels rude not to turn and say something back, I continue on without doing so.
I don’t want to seem too eager or excited; might give the poor guy the wrong impression.
I am not in a good place in my life. The last thing I should be doing is dragging someone else into the hot mess that is my existence. But I am short in the friend department, and one can always use more friends, right?
At least that’s the justification I give myself for accepting Travis’s invitation.
Even if I am a little smitten with him after that interaction, and well, all the others we’ve had.
There’s just something so easy about him.
Truth be told, I’m envious of it. The ease and genuineness of his smile.
When was the last time I smiled and it felt even remotely real?
That I laughed and it didn’t feel forced.
That I actually enjoyed myself, truly and thoroughly.
I used to be that person—happy, carefree, driven. Now, I’m nothing more than a shell of that girl. My outer layer cracked and shed away like a second skin that I no longer fit into.
I shake off the thought. Self-pity will get me nowhere. And while I may have no idea what the future holds for me, at least I have a future. Not everyone is so lucky.
With that thought at the forefront of my mind, I push my way inside the office, every fiber in my body zinging to life when I see Penn sitting at his desk, his fingers moving across his keyboard so quickly that for a brief moment, I wonder if he’s even typing anything at all, or if he’s just pretending to.
Then again, given the way his forehead furrows in concentration and he doesn’t immediately look up when I enter, I guess perhaps my first observation was incorrect.
I take the opportunity while he’s distracted to slip around my desk, quietly taking a seat so as to draw as little attention to myself as possible.
I haven’t seen Penn since our fight last week. He’s done a really good job of avoiding me and honestly, I’m grateful. I don’t want to face him any more than he wants to face me. And while I don’t regret a single thing I said during our argument, I do regret letting him get to me the way he did.
I guess a part of me really thought that things would be okay between us if I ever came back to Wren Cove. Clearly, I had underestimated the amount of hurt that Penn would hold onto. Not that I haven’t held onto my fair share too. But at the end of the day, I was the one who left.
“You were late this morning.”
I jump when he speaks, having fully expected him to continue on like I wasn’t even here.
“How do you know that?” I can’t help but ask. I was like three minutes late and he most certainly wasn’t here yet as everything was still locked up when I arrived.
“You disarmed the alarm,” he says without looking up at me.
“Sorry. I didn’t realize you were such a stickler on time. I was under the impression that as long as I got my work done, it didn’t much matter.” It’s an effort to keep my voice from taking on an edge.
“Well, it does. So please try to be on time going forward.” Seems I’m not the only one trying to keep things even relatively professional.
In truth, I’m surprised I even have a job after last week, and while I considered just not coming back, I couldn’t give him the satisfaction of thinking he won. I am nothing if not stubborn.
“Okay,” I agree, opening my laptop.
“And going forward, while you’re here, I expect you to keep your focus on work.”
He doesn’t have to say he’s referring to Alec; I already know that much. And while a part of me wished it were because he was jealous, because that would mean he still cared. I think it’s more about Alec being nice to me when Penn expects him to hate me as much as he does.
“My focus is on work. If you don’t want me talking to people who come into this office, perhaps you should advise them not to come in at all.”
“It’s been addressed.”
However awful I thought working for Penn Kade would be, nothing could have prepared me for this. The silent treatments. The cold, distant responses. The way he scolds me like a child. The hatred in his eyes every time he looks at me. It’s almost more than I can bear.
But every time I think about throwing in the towel, I remind myself that’s exactly what he’s hoping for and for some reason, I can’t give him that satisfaction. Make no mistake, this is war, and I have no intention of letting him win.
“Well, okay then.” I stare at him for a long moment, willing him to look at me.
He doesn’t. “Now, if you don’t mind, I have work to do.
” I turn my attention to my laptop, not able to focus on anything but the sound of his fingers moving across the keyboard and the creak of his chair as he readjusts every few seconds like he can’t get comfortable.
When he lets out an agitated groan, I look over to see him staring directly at me.
“What? What did I do now?” I ask, assuming he’s about to grill me for something else.
“Why did you come back to Wren Cove?” He surprises me by asking.
“Why does it matter?” I fight to keep any emotion from slipping into my voice.
“Why can’t you just answer the question?” His agitation flares.
“Are you asking as my boss or as my...” I trail off, realizing that’s all he is—my boss. He’s not my friend. Not my boyfriend. Not the boy I loved more than life itself. Just my boss. “You know what, it doesn’t matter. I came back because I wanted to.” The lie tastes like acid on my tongue.
In truth, I didn’t want to come back. I tried so hard not to that I nearly found myself homeless.
I never understood what kept me away, why I refused to come home for holidays and special occasions.
Why my parents and Josie always had to come to me, never the other way around.
But deep down, I think a part of me has always known—because I was afraid to face the man currently studying me like I’m a confusing piece of art that he can’t figure out the meaning of.
“Because you wanted to,” he states flatly, not trying to hide the fact that he doesn’t believe that lie for a single second.
“I missed my family. New York is crowded... and expensive.”
“And dance? You just gave it up?”
“So what if I did?”
“Just trying to figure out why you would walk away from something that seven years ago was worth imploding my life for.”
My expression hardens.
“For what it’s worth, I never meant to implode your life.”
“Good to know. Unfortunately, it’s not worth much.” He turns his attention back to his computer, effectively ending the conversation.
I open my mouth and close it again at least a hundred times over the next few minutes, wanting so badly to tell him the truth, to apologize, to beg him to forgive me, but at the end of the day, I don’t think that it would change anything. So I hold onto my pride even though I know I shouldn’t.