Chapter 36 #2
Right when my thoughts got the best of me, I heard her say, “Vaughn, I’m ready.”
I came up and looked at her. “You sure you ready for this? Ain’t no coming back from it.”
She leaned in, put her hands on my face, and said, “I’m positive.”
Fuck it, I thought. She want it, I’ma give it to her.
I lay her down with nonstop kissing and rubbing her pussy. I made her rub my dick, showing her I wasn’t nothing to play with. I got between her legs, trying to control how hard I got, but my dick barely touched her, and I got too stiff.
I never took a woman’s virginity before, not even when I was young. I was always into experienced girls, so this was new to me, too.
I took in her body. Every tattoo, every mark, every beauty mark, every scar. This woman was fine as fuck, flaws and all.
“I’m supposed to be going celibate,” I told her.
“You can be after this.”
I raised an eyebrow. “What that mean?”
“We’ll talk later.”
I spread her legs a lil more as I kissed her. When I began to slide in, she tensed up and wrapped her legs around me.
“Relax, ma. I got you,” I assured her.
I only went halfway in and stroked her slowly.
Damn, I forgot to put a condom on, I thought. I wasn’t stopping to get one, only if she asked me, and she didn’t. I told myself I’d just pull out and pray.
The moment felt like heaven. It was intimate, and I was thankful to be her first. I wasn’t going to take advantage of her or gloat about how special she was to me. This was something I was keeping to myself.
She moaned in my mouth, she scratched my back, she bit my lip, and called out my name. I looked at her, and she had tears in her eyes. I slowed a bit more.
“You okay?” I asked her, wiping her tears away.
“It hurt a little, but it feels good too. I can’t believe I’m doing this,” she uttered.
“I can stop if you want me to.”
“No, keep going.”
I did.
I ain’t last nothing but twenty minutes because she was too tight and too wet. I tried not to pound her, but I sped it up. I knew my back was going to be scratched up because of the way she was digging her nails into me.
“I’m ‘bout to cum, ma, but I’ma pull out,” I told her, breathless.
“Okay… we didn’t use a condom,” she suddenly looked nervous.
“I know. Don’t worry, I got you. I’m clean, and you ain’t gon’ get pregnant.”
Right when I was about to cum, I grabbed my robe that was still on the bed. I pulled out and nutted in the towel, and it felt great. I wiped my dick and saw a little blood.
I’d popped this grown-ass woman’s cherry.
I looked at her and smirked. “You mine now…”
She looked at me wide-eyed for a second. Her cheeks were flushed, her hair stuck to her face a little, her body still trembling under me.
I kissed her forehead and rolled off carefully.
“You okay?” I asked her.
She nodded fast. “Yeah.”
“You sure?”
“Yes.” She laughed softly, looking embarrassed now. “I just can’t believe I did it.”
That made me smirk.
Sade sat up, but as soon as she stood, her legs gave out a little.
“Whoa.” I grabbed her waist quickly.
She laughed harder now. “Oh, my God.”
“That bad?”
“You kinda rearranged my insides.”
I laughed under my breath. I put on my sweats and then walked her toward the bathroom while she held onto my arm.
Once she got inside, she looked back at me. “Vaughn, I’m fine.”
“I know.”
“You don’t gotta stand there.”
I leaned against the doorway, folding my arms. “You been watching me for two days. Now I’m watching you.”
She rolled her eyes while trying not to smile.
I watched her sit down on the toilet carefully before turning around, pretending like i was giving her privacy after exploring her whole body.
“You happy?” I asked her after a minute.
“With what?”
“With us doing what we just did.”
She stayed quiet long enough to make me look back at her.
“I’m not regretting it, if that’s what you’re asking. I wanted it to be you.”
That sat with me harder than it should have.
Sade finished her business on the toilet, stood up, washed her hands, and brushed her teeth. She walked back over to me. I pulled her into my chest without thinking about it.
“I don’t want this to become some big dramatic thing,” she told me.
“It won’t.”
She looked up at me. “And don’t make this about Marcus.”
I looked away for a second before answering.
“I will, but I won’t.”
“What that mean?”
“I’m not saying drop him, but you need to drop him,” I told her honestly. “He ain’t good for you.”
“You saying that because we fucked?”
“Nah. I’m saying it because I know the nigga and his history.”
Her face shifted slightly after that. “I don’t want drama, Vaughn.”
“Trust me. It won’t be.”
She studied me for a second before nodding.
“I enjoyed what we did, but I don’t think we should do it again. At least not any time soon.”
I laughed low. “You regulating how much pussy I get already?”
“I’m serious.” She smiled a little. “You said you wanted to be celibate. Focus on that and your life.”
I rubbed my beard, looking down at her.
“You’re right. But I don’t know how long I can wait for you, Sade.”
“Just take care of you, and we’ll figure out the rest along the way.”
I looked at her for a second too long before kissing her again.
“Stay with me for a couple more days.”
“Okay… I’ll have Laila bring me a few things.”
The days felt strange as hell in the best way.
Every morning I woke up expecting her to leave on her own, and every morning she was still there. Curled up somewhere in the suite watching TV, ordering food, or fussing at me every time I reached for a blunt.
“You not smoking that,” she said one morning, snatching the blunt right out of my hand.
“You getting real controlling.”
“And you’re getting healthy. Be grateful.”
I laughed and let her keep the blunt.
We spent most of the time talking.
Not surface-level shit either.
Real conversations.
Childhood stories. Family. Regrets. Fear. Life.
I found out Sade hated thunderstorms when she was younger because they reminded her of the night her mother died.
She found out I started smoking heavy and using drugs after college when the pressure got too hard.
We ate together. Slept together. Kissed whenever we felt like it.
No sex again.
Just us.
By the third morning, I finally felt strong enough to stand in front of the mirror and recognize myself again.
I looked over at Sade sitting on the couch, eating fruit out of the bowl she ordered, and sighed.
“I need you back on the site.”
She looked up at me. “You sure?”
“Yeah.” I nodded. “I’m coming back too. Give me less than two weeks.”
“That’s still a long time.”
“I know.”
She stood up and walked over to me. “You promise?”
“I promise.”
She hugged me around my waist and rested her face against me.
Damn, leaving somebody felt harder than being alone.
When she finally walked toward the door with her bag, I stayed standing there watching her.
She looked back at me right before leaving.
“Don’t disappear again.”
“I won’t.”
“Don’t smoke either.”
“I’m not.”
And for once…
I meant it.