40. Rowan
Rowan
One minute, Bastian was kissing me, and the next, he was putting space between us, his expression transforming to a strange mask of stoicism. The energy shifted, and I could actually see the switch flip when he realized what he’d done.
He pulled back, and I stood there staring at him as he put up those iron-clad defenses of his. His eyes darkened, and his hands fell away from me as he took a step toward the cabin. What hit me hardest was how he appeared to be actually nervous.
God, he’s almost… skittish.
“We should get back. It isn’t safe for you here.” He turned on his heel and faced the cabin.
I wanted to argue with him, but he wasn’t wrong.
We still didn’t know who had tried to kill me, and going to the cabin hadn’t given me any of my memories back.
Though it had given me a chance to see the real Bastian underneath all the layers.
I wasn’t going to be quick to forget that.
And knowing what I did, it sort of made sense.
The Bastian from before I was taken was gone. That kind of pain didn’t just disappear overnight.
Looking around, I let out a sigh, the world heavier again. “I thought I’d be more terrified being here, but I’m not,” I admitted.
“You should be,” Bastian grumbled, stomping off.
Only, he didn’t go far. It didn’t escape me that, even though he was retreating into his protective shell, he stayed in sight of me, keeping me near. I hesitated to go back to the cabin, standing just outside for a moment.
“He’s got more problems than a math textbook.” Griffin frowned, striding over to me.
“You can say that again.” I sighed, looking at where he stood by a window, just inside, keeping me in his peripheral vision. “I think I get it a bit better, though. There’s some work to be done, but I think we can do it.”
Griff stepped toward me, putting a hand on my shoulder. “You are the healer, so…”
We took a minute before going to join the others. As I walked inside, I brushed my fingers over my lips, then dropped my hand and met up with the rest of the group.
I assumed that I would drive back with Griffin. Considering it was how we’d gone to the cabin, it seemed to make sense in my brain, but as we approached the cars, Orsen stepped forward, snatching the keys off my best friend.
“I’m driving,” he interjected. “Not about to let this one get away again.” He shot me a wink, and I rolled my eyes.
Griffin held his hands up. “I’ll take the back seat. Rowan, you’ve got shotgun.”
I didn’t mind that. Teasing Orsen on the drive could pass the time.
“I’m coming, too! We can play car games!” Nix cried out, jogging over to the SUV and playfully bumping into Griff. The two of them chuckled to themselves while Orsen grimaced, pinching the bridge of his nose.
“Fucking fantastic. This is going to be one long drive.”
I walked next to him, patting him on the shoulder. “Oh, don’t worry. How bad could it be?”
Orsen eyed me, his brows up. “Just wait, Rowan. Just wait.”
But then it hit me that we still had their car to worry about, and I glanced around like the answer would drop out of thin air. “Who’s going to drive the other—”
“I got it.” Bastian jerked his chin. Orsen tossed him the keys without hesitation.
“Are you sure you don’t want to join us?” I asked.
He shook his head, though a tiny smirk, barely perceptible, appeared on one side of his mouth.
“And deal with them? No, thanks. It’s fine. I need to… clear my head, anyway.”
Bastian left it at that, and I didn’t feel the need to push him. He’d already opened up about a lot. I worried that if I demanded more, he’d just wall himself up again, completely this time.
So it was settled. It didn’t take long for us to get packed up and out of there. Orsen, Nix, Griffin, Greylen, and I were all crammed into my car, three of them in the back seat while Bastian drove his car back solo.
“Why is the steering wheel pink?” Orsen asked as he buckled his seat belt.
“Because I wanted it to be pink?” I shrugged. “It’s fun. I wanted to decorate the car, so sue me.”
He restrained a laugh, adjusting the mirror, which also had a little wrap on it, this one showing pink and red roses.
The first hour in the car was filled with idle chitchat, talking about nothing in particular.
But after that, even Nix had run out of things to say, and the silence got a bit annoying.
When Griffin attempted to turn on the radio by leaning through the center of the car, Orsen glowered at him. “It is finally quiet.”
I shot him a look. “If you don’t let him turn the radio on, I will put on the most obnoxious bubblegum pop you can imagine,” I threatened with a grin.
“It’s her car, what she says goes,” Griffin agreed.
Orsen rolled his eyes. “Fine, fine. Let’s just hold off on the road-trip games for a little longer, please.”
The guys lasted about fifteen minutes before Griffin and Nix were looking for signs in every letter of the alphabet. I sort of felt bad for Grey, who couldn’t escape it, since he was stuck back there with them.
“Ha, pizza! We got our P!” Nix called out, and I eyed the sign as we passed it, my stomach grumbling.
Orsen flicked his stare over to me, and I chuckled as I put a hand over my gurgling belly. “Sorry, I guess I’m a little hungry. I’ll admit that we didn’t really bring food with us.”
“Yet another reason why you’re not supposed to run off half-cocked.” Orsen focused on the road, but I could feel the tension radiating off him. “I really don’t mind you going off and doing your thing. You’re a healer, I get it, but a better grasp of your safety would be appreciated.”
I nodded, not able to find the words as Griff and Nix struggled through the letter Q. That one was going to take a while.
In fact, several minutes passed before we found one, because of course I’d joined in at that point. And sure enough, it was an exit sign. We celebrated rather loudly, but then I noticed Orsen actually taking the exit off the highway.
“Wait, why did you just turn off?” I asked, looking around.
My question was answered a moment later when we pulled up outside a fast-food joint.
“You said you were hungry. Pick what you want. We’ll go through the drive-thru.”
A smile spread across my face. I’d made the comment off-hand, but Orsen had listened, even as he was scolding me a tad.
“I’ll have a cheeseburger and fries,” I said, smiling as I leaned across the center console and placed a kiss on Orsen’s cheek.
“I’ll have the same!” Griffin said from the back, pressing in between us. “And a kiss if you’re doling them out.”
I laughed, giving him one, too, and rolled my eyes as I leaned into my seat and got comfortable.
Orsen drove up to the window, ordering for us all as the guys shouted out what they wanted, and then pulled up to the window to pay.
It was way more than it should have been, but I’d forgotten we had four dragons in the car, and they could eat a lot.
“Wait.” I looked over at Orsen. “Will Bastian be confused that we pulled off?”
Orsen smiled, jerking his thumb backward. “Nah. He’s good.”
I turned around, looking out the window to see Bastian’s car behind us. Bastian met my eyes through the windshield. I don’t know what possessed me to do it, but I gave him a little wave.
His eyes went wide, but he nodded back. If I didn’t know any better, I’d have sworn the tips of his ears were turning pink.
Of all the things I’d expected, it wasn’t that.
Was he actually feeling shy or something after kissing me?
I smiled wider at him, and then the car got moving again and I had to turn around.
“Here ya go.” I took my food from Orsen, who passed out the rest to the rowdy group of Alphas in the back. “Hopefully, this buys me a few more minutes of peace because your mouths will be too full of food to speak.”
Shooting Orsen a smile with my brows up, I commented, “Have you met these animals? What do you think will stop them from talking with their mouths full?”
Orsen blanched, playing into his horrified shock. “Dear God, I’ll never be safe.”
We all laughed as Orsen pulled out of the drive-thru.
I glanced at the passenger-side mirror as we did, watching Bastian follow us.
I wasn’t quite sure what was going on there, but I wasn’t as quick to judge Bastian for being a little closed off.
If the trip had given me nothing else, at least there was that.
And that was something.