Chapter 15
They were halfway to the manor before Cecilia decided to speak, “Lady Charity is trouble.”
“I would not characterize the good lady as trouble,” Cassian said, while extending a long leg to brush hers.
“Oh, really?” she asked tightly. “What did she whisper in your ear then?”
“An… offer,” he said warily.
“So, she did make you an inappropriate offer,” she exclaimed, and the words came out more bluntly than she intended. She cringed at the words as they echoed in her ears, and she knew she sounded like a jealous fishwife.
Of course, he wouldn’t view the woman’s wanton proposition as an imposition. He was a rake, and he’d earned the title by bedding women just like Charity. She couldn’t feign nonchalance any longer.
“I was not going to accept her offer,” he explained calmly.
“Are you sure?” she snapped.
When she looked his way, Cassian’s shrewd gaze was waiting. Cecilia stifled the urge to flinch. His lips twitched while his head canted to the side, “You are jealous.”
“I am not.”
Tension crackled in the space between their bodies.
“Recklessness,” he echoed.
“You are reckless,” she said staunchly.
“Cecilia, what do I have to do to prove to you that I hold fast to my word and that I will not invite anyone into my bed, or join anyone else’s?” Cassian said.
His words made her bravado wobble.
Cassian rolled his neck and, in a swift move, tugged the window shade down, and before Cecilia could blink twice, he hauled her onto his lap. His fingers plucked the pins from her hair before they speared into her thick locks.
Angling his head, he kissed her, hard. He thrust deep into her mouth, and his tongue brushed past hers. The slick twining made them both moan while his hands slipped under her bottom and squeezed.
She strained against her confinement, and yet she could not get away from the relentless kiss. Her head told her to pull away, but her heart had her hands gripping his shoulders as he held her in place.
Cecilia pulled off to suck in a breath over her burning lungs, and before she could draw in another, his lips were on hers again. Her mind grew blurry with his masterful, drugging kiss. The addictive heat of his mouth moving over hers had her rocking slightly on his lap.
Her passion flared in pure and stunning discovery. He tasted of corruption, of sin… and oddly enough, of freedom. All she could do was cling to the wicked touch that was anchoring her and turning her inside out all at the same time.
“I would hate for you to be jealous…” Cassian growled in her ear. “When you have me. Admit you were jealous.”
Cecilia swallowed. “No.”
His tongue slid against hers, and a molten wave washed over her. She moaned and once again had to pull away because her lungs burned for air. Just when she thought she might die with the pleasure of it, he left her lips to suckle her earlobe, to lick his way down her neck.
Arching to the left to give him access, she let out a soft moan. He kissed her harder, and something sizzled up her spine.
Her body felt on fire, and yet she wanted more heat. A whimper escaped her throat as he cupped her bottom tighter, fondling her through the three layers of skirts. Under her bodice, her nipples tightened, and need streamed through her veins.
“Admit it,” Cassian goaded her again. “You were jealous.”
She would never admit it. “No.”
His hands slid under her skirt and the passing of his rough palms over her skin had her shivering. Startled, she realized her quim was shockingly wet and aching.
Cassian’s mouth was on her neck again, the soft pull of his lips too much and just not enough. “Admit it.”
She’d die first. “No.”
“Devil and damn you are stubborn,” he muttered. His hands slid up her side to rest under the hollow beneath her arms while his thumbs skittered over her tender nipples.
Cecilia leaped away so fiercely, she nearly toppled over. Cassian’s reflexes grabbed her in that split second and hauled her back to him. “Stay put,” his voice dipped in authority with the command.
She felt trapped; there was no escaping, even if she wanted to, because something inside her responded to his authority.
Dimly, she felt the carriage slow to a halt and realized that they were at the manor, but he made no move to leave, so neither did she.
He held her face firm and slanted his lips across hers, and Cassian took her lips in a kiss of violent tenderness. He slid his hands into her hair, his fingers tangling in her tresses as he held her close for his ravishing.
They kissed endlessly, and he only released her lips for her to take a breath as he kissed along her jaw, down her neck, and over her collarbone. He arched her, dipped his head, and licked over her clothed nipple. How naughty it felt to be kissed so scandalously through her clothes!
Her body responded viciously with a shudder of delight. His lips returned to her again, and the sweep of his tongue through her mouth dimmed the thoughts circling her mind.
His mouth met her ear, “Admit it, and I’ll stop.”
“Or…” her breath was faint.
“I’ll take you to my bed tonight,” he snarled. “And the things I have done to you so far will feel very tame to what I’ll do with you there.”
She swallowed, “I…”
“Say it,” Cassian kissed under her ear.
“I was jealous,” she admitted breathily, at last.
“Good girl,” he murmured velvetly. “Was that so hard?”
“Immensely,” she whispered.
“You know… seeing how you have responded to me so far, I have an idea.” His hand trailed up the nape of her neck. “And that is of me giving you lessons on intimacy.
“Think about it, you will need to use it after this marriage is dissolved, and I do not have to spend my nights alone as I planned.”
Her instinct was to say no… but his argument did have merit. She thought of the many novels she had read—some she had read in the middle of the night as the content of them was filled with things no young woman of good breeding should consider reading at all.
The slow smirk made her cheeks redden.
“I see that I’ve piqued your interest,” Cassian rasped, his hand brushing her hair from her eyes. “If you’d like… I can give you many more reasons to agree.”
Cecilia shook herself out of her daze. “No, I don’t think you need to do anything more. If I agree, and that is if, how do you propose we do this? Do I wait to be summoned to your quarters at your whim?”
“God no,” Cassian allowed her to get off his lap and righten her clothes. Her hair, however, was a lost cause. “I want you to tell me ten novels you’ve read, the scandalous ones, and what you want to recreate. I am sure I can do much better than that poor sod on the pages.”
She tried to look innocent, because how dare he think she had read novels of that kind? “Very brave of you to assume I’ve read such things.”
His brows ticked up. “You really think I am an idiot, don’t you?”
“I—I haven’t—”
“Yes, you have,” he stated, while stepping out of the vehicle. “And one more thing about me, sweetheart, I abhor lies. For that lie, you have earned yourself five spankings.”
Scrambling to him, Cecilia whispered, “You cannot be serious with that!”
They bypassed the footmen at the door, and she was a step behind him on the stairs. When he did not utter a word, she followed him to his rooms.
“Cassian!” she called out. “You cannot be serious.”
He spun in place, and with a meep, she jumped back and met the wall. Cassian caged her in with one arm raised over her head and pinned her with a piercing glance.
“Tell me I am lying,” he dared. “You know these terms, Cecilia. Gamahuche.”
She swallowed.
“Fellatio,” he said.
Cecilia went red.
Cassian pressed on. “Bread and Butter.”
Her face burned.
“Soixante-neuf.”
She wanted to collapse and die.
“Riding St. George,” Cassian’s brow ticked up expectingly.
Clapping her hands over her fiery face, Cecilia begged. “Please stop. Stop.”
“My point,” he pushed away and strode into his room, and she followed. Cassian plopped down on a chair to pluck his boots off. “Cecilia, for the last time, will you stop being a marionette and allow the human woman inside of you to come to the fore?”
He leaned into the chair and looked at her, and something ugly twisted in Cecilia’s stomach.
“I—”
He leaned forward, “Spit it out, Cecilia. Get it off your chest.”
“I—” Did she dare tell him some of her deepest secrets? “…I can’t.”
“You can’t do what?” Cassian asked easily.
Oddly enough, his even tone still felt as if he was needling her, pressing her to face old truths she did not want to confront—but the way Cassian was looking at her made irritation bubble under her skin.
“I cannot be as free as you are,” she said at last.
He slung an arm over the back of the chair and rolled his neck. “And why is that?”
“Because I cannot!” She blurted, her fists clenching by her side.
“I cannot discard the rules of propriety and live as loosely and as unstable as you or any lord can do.
A lord can drink and carouse and philander his way through a thousand women, and the ton will shrug and say, he is sowing his wild oats.
“’Tis a truth universally ignored that a gentleman may ruin a dozen reputations and still be invited to supper with the Prince, while a lady need only be seen smiling too freely to be cast into social exile,” Cecila finished.
Leaning forward, Cassian clasped his hands between his knees, “I am not asking you to ride into town and proposition the first man you see, Cecilia, I am asking you to peel away the facade you’ve made for yourself and allow your own deeply-buried emotions to emerge.”
“I still cannot do that!” Cecilia snapped.
“Why?” His sharp grey gaze was like a double-edged sword cutting right through her.
“Because I don’t know what I want for myself yet!” Cecilia blurted hotly. Immediately, she clamped her hands over her mouth, eyes wide in horrified dismay.