Chapter Seven
G race couldn’t wait to get outside. London did not have the cleanest air, but it was better than the stuffiness inside. Not to mention the spiteful, small women right now exclaiming their outrage. She lifted her chin and ignored the catty whispers. After all, people had whispered, pointed or outright thrown things at her for her entire life. She had come too far to bend now.
She took her wrap from the haughty butler, but was forced to wait as the Duke looked around.
‘Where is your maid?’ he asked.
She frowned at him. ‘We didn’t bring her.’
It had been just her and her father in the carriage. Why would she need a servant’s escort?
The Duke shook his head. ‘Your father is too casual with your reputation.’
‘I am not to walk abroad with my father?’
‘No, Miss Richards. You are not to walk alone with me.’
Then he snapped his fingers at the butler, who bowed.
‘Right away, Your Grace,’ he intoned, before stepping over to whisper to a footman.
Grace watched the exchange with confusion, before turning her attention back to the Duke.
‘I am not helpless,’ she said.
She could fight, and she could run fast when the situation called for it. She was likely the most capable woman in this house, but she didn’t say so—especially when the Duke shook his head.
‘I protect your reputation, Miss Richards. Your person is safe with me.’
A moment later, a maid rushed up from below stairs, pulling on a cloak likely too heavy for the spring weather. She looked flushed, and her hands were raw, but her demeanour was cheerful enough.
‘This is Millie, Your Grace,’ said the butler. ‘She is quiet and respectful.’
Those last words were aimed at the girl, as if she needed reminding how to act. The Duke nodded and turned to go, but Grace was not willing to dismiss anyone so quickly.
‘We must have pulled you from a task. Do you need to return quickly?’
Millie’s eyes widened in shock. ‘Er...yes, miss. I were kneading the dough for tonight, but—’
Her words were cut off at the butler’s imperious sniff. Then the man turned to the Duke. ‘Millie is at your disposal for as long as you require,’ he said loudly.
‘Is someone else covering your tasks, then?’ Grace pressed.
The girl dropped her gaze to the floor. ‘You need not concern yourself with that, miss.’
Which meant, no. This walk was an added burden. But one look at the men’s faces told Grace that her enquiry had infuriated the butler and confused the Duke. Additional discussion would not be looked upon favourably. The best she could do to mitigate the situation was to give the girl a gentle smile.
‘We will not keep you away from your duties for long,’ she said.
‘Yes, miss. I will enjoy the respite. It is a fine—’
Her words were cut off again, this time by the snap of the butler’s fingers.
Grace flashed an apologetic smile to the girl, then turned towards the door. She was momentarily confused when the Duke held out his arm, but she adapted quickly enough. She set her fingers on his forearm, as she had been taught, and they stepped out into the fine afternoon.
She didn’t dare look behind her to see if Millie followed, but she could hear the girl’s footsteps.
A few moments later, she spoke softly to the Duke. ‘You are right. We should have brought my maid.’
He slanted her a glance. ‘You are also right, but I don’t think we agree on the reasons. You shouldn’t worry about the girl’s duties. That is Nagel’s responsibility.’
‘Nagel is the butler?’
‘Yes. Generally, the butler manages the servants, along with the housekeeper.’
She nodded. She’d been taught as much. ‘And does Nagel seem a forgiving kind of man? Does he understand what it takes to make bread, or that she will not have time to finish her other tasks?’
He was silent for a long moment. ‘I have no idea what kind of man he is below stairs, though my aunt has praised his efficiency.’
She didn’t respond. She knew what that meant in a Chinese household. A ruthless master often meant that the higher servants were equally ruthless, if not more so. She would have liked to believe that it was different in England. Her father treated his manservant well, and the maid who had been hired for herself and Lucy seemed kind enough. Indeed, Grace had learned nearly as much from her talkative maid as she had her tutors. But she could not speak to what happened in other households.
The Duke turned them to the right, his expression distracted. ‘I will say something to Nagel to be sure that she is not ill-treated for this outing.’
He said the words, but she could tell from his tone that he thought it a needless action. And indeed, she agreed. If the butler were a tyrant, then a word from the Duke would make things worse rather than better. The only way to know would be to ask Millie what she would prefer.
She turned around to address the maid. ‘Would that be helpful?’ she asked. ‘If the Duke were to say something to Mr Nagel? Or would it make things harder?’
The girl’s mouth dropped open in shock. Indeed, so startled was she at being addressed that she couldn’t seem to form any words, especially when the Duke himself turned to look at her.
‘Well?’ he enquired.
Thankfully, his tone wasn’t abrupt, but she could tell the girl was nearly shaking in terror at being so addressed.
‘Never mind,’ Grace said, as she turned back. ‘I think it best if we let things be.’
At least she hoped so. Millie didn’t sport any obvious bruises, and she walked with a happy lift to her heels. If she were being mistreated, then it was well hidden.
They walked a few more steps before the Duke spoke again, his tone thoughtful. ‘Is that common in China? Are servants usually...?’ His voice trailed off as if he couldn’t find the right words.
‘Beaten? Raped? Terrified into submission?’
‘Good God!’ he gasped, clearly horrified. ‘Is that how your underclass is treated?’
She turned to watch his reaction to her next words. ‘Do you suppose that never happens in England? If women are so safe, why do we need maids to go with us everywhere?’
He frowned, clearing his throat. ‘Well, of course there are some instances. Horrible, terrible things. We most certainly don’t condone it!’
‘Neither is it condoned in China,’ she said softly. ‘But it happens nonetheless.’
He gaped at her. ‘Were you—?’ He swallowed. ‘I mean—um...’
‘No. I am whole.’
By which she meant she was still a virgin. However, she knew that for a discarded child such as her, she was the exception rather than the rule.
‘The monks taught us how to fight. Even the girls.’ Her lips twisted. ‘Especially the girls.’
He nodded, though he still appeared flustered. ‘I should not have asked. That was wrong of me.’
‘Then you would have wondered—or assumed.’
He didn’t respond to that, though she could tell he wanted to. Her father had wanted to ask as well, and it had taken many months of getting to know him aboard ship for them to become easy enough together to speak of it. Indeed, it had been Lord Domac who’d broached the question, thereby forcing the discussion between herself and her father.
‘My parentage rests upon my face. Anyone who looks at me knows I am not of a blessed union. As such, I deserve less respect in China than even the lowest beggar of clear race.’
‘That’s despicable,’ he said, his voice hard.
She glanced at him, startled at the vehemence in his tone.
It took him a moment to register her expression, and then his voice turned rueful. ‘You seem shocked, Miss Richards. Do you think English men would treat you so shabbily?’
‘Your aunt and her guests believe I am less than they.’
He snorted. ‘My aunt and her guests believe everyone is less than they. It has nothing to do with your race.’
She arched her brows at him, and he flushed.
‘Very well, you are right. It has a great deal to do with your race, and I am sorry for that. I had not thought that they could be so mean.’
She snorted, and then abruptly covered her mouth. She should not have expressed her doubt so openly. When he looked at her, his mouth agape, she tried to apologise. ‘I meant no harm,’ she said quickly. ‘I do not know your customs. I should not venture an opinion.’
He sighed. ‘I welcome your opinion, even when it is expressed inadvertently.’
Was that a kind way of referring to her snort?
‘But believe me,’ he pressed, ‘some of the most despicable people I know are full-blooded Englishmen of high rank. And some of the kindest come from the lowest rungs of society. I do not think title or bloodline are accurate measures of one’s humanity.’
That surprised her. How did a wealthy mandarin meet anyone—kind or not—from the lowest caste?
He shook his head. ‘You are shocked?’
‘I do not understand England well enough to be shocked. In China, the rich children are kept well away from the poor.’
He nodded. ‘Many are here, but I was a wanderer.’
She was not surprised. She remembered the way he had ached to go up the mast, and the hunger in his eyes as he’d looked around in the crow’s nest. Many in this world were content in their very tiny corner, but she had spent years on boats or by docks. She knew the yearning in some to explore. She wondered if his responsibilities as a duke prevented him from indulging his desires.
‘Where did you go?’ she asked.
He smiled. ‘Everywhere I could. Our nannies were always busy.’ He glanced at her. ‘I have a younger brother and three younger sisters. And two who did not live long.’ His tone dipped at that, but he did not seem to dwell on it. ‘Whenever they were busy with the younger children, I escaped to my own amusements.’
‘I cannot believe your servants were so careless.’
‘I was lucky in that,’ he said with a grin. ‘And I was lucky to befriend our gamekeeper. He had a boy a little older than I, whom I worshipped.’
She smiled trying to envisage this large man as a young boy. ‘Did you try to do everything he could?’
‘I did. And I assumed that because I was the ducal heir I should do everything better than everyone else.’ He shrugged. ‘I couldn’t, of course. And I learned to stuff away my pride when dealing with Jacky or any of his older siblings.’ He looked off into the distance. ‘It wasn’t easy. I had no control over my rage.’ His lips quirked. ‘Fortunately, I wasn’t large enough to cause any damage. They were well protected from me.’
‘Were they unkind to you?’
‘No. Not unkind, exactly, but it gave me the experience of being the youngest.’
‘Did they have a mother?’
‘God, yes.’ His tone and his expression softened. ‘She told the most amazing stories. Tales of poor beggars who needed a helping hand, old men whom nobody listened to but who knew great secrets.’ His gaze was soft in memory. ‘I never heard those stories from anyone else. Honestly, I think she made them up, but she could tell them so well we believed them. And when she was too tired to speak she got her husband to tell them. And her father as well, who came to live with them.’ He shook his head. ‘That whole family was a never-ending source of stories, and always with a moral pointed at someone.’
‘At you?’ she asked.
‘Often. Usually the ones about pride and wilful ignorance.’ He chuckled. ‘But I was not the only one who needed a lesson or three.’
She could hear the humour in his voice, and knew he had enjoyed a happy childhood—at least when in the gamekeeper’s cottage.
‘The monks had many such tales as well,’ she said.
‘I should like to hear them.’
‘Lucy remembers them more than I do. I always wanted to learn how to slay the demons myself. I didn’t believe that someone mystical would do the slaying for me.’
‘A practical mind, then?’
She nodded. ‘And too restless to sit still.’
She looked at him, wishing he had joined them on the boat four months ago instead of Lord Domac. She would have preferred learning English from him. She would have enjoyed long nights staring at the stars with him. But it had been his cousin who’d stepped onto the boat in India, and his cousin who had befriended her father. And it was his cousin her father had formed a friendship with.
She kept her thoughts to herself. Her father had told her to be discerning with the gentlemen she met. He wanted her to evaluate them honestly. So she tried to separate her feelings—which were definitely confused—from the facts.
The Duke seemed to be a man of influence and intelligence without the rashness she feared in Lord Domac. But he also seemed to dislike her restless nature. Hadn’t he chastised her for travelling without a maid? And he was constantly worried about her reputation. The man was excruciatingly aware of all the tiny rules of society that she could never remember. She had no idea if he was right or wrong in his assessment, and she disliked not understanding the rules.
Fortunately, he didn’t seem to be angry when correcting her. What irritation did colour his voice seemed to be directed at other people. Nevertheless, she was wary. He lived under a myriad of rules that seemed to apply to every detail of his life. Why wasn’t he screaming in frustration at their constant weight?
She turned away, wishing she were naturally quiet, like Lucy. Would she never find a place where she could be herself safely? Of all the people she had met, this man interested her the most. But he clearly did not approve of her, so she would have to think more about Lord Domac.
That made her heart twist in a way that startled her. She liked the Duke, but she had liked many different men in her life. Turning away from them had never made her chest tighten with regret. What made him so different that her body seemed to want to linger near him?
Meanwhile, the Duke had guided them around a corner to reveal a wide open space of green set in the middle of the city. And not just green. She heard the happy babble of water nearby, not to mention the laughter of children and the murmur of voices from nannies talking as they watched their charges.
‘This is St James’s Park,’ he said. ‘It’s one of the lovelier places in London.’
‘It is huge,’ she said as she stepped forward. Because it was spring, the flowers were a gorgeous riot of colour. ‘This is available to everyone?’ she asked as she looked around.
There were no gates that she could see. Only people enjoying the beautiful day.
‘Do you not have public parks in China?’
‘Yes, but most gardens are enclosed. Private places enjoyed by the wealthy families who tend them.’
‘Then I am pleased to bring you here.’
She lifted her face to the sky, wishing to pull off her hat to feel the wind in her hair. She supposed it was enough to feel the sun on her face, if only for a few moments.
He let her bask for a bit, before directing her along a path. ‘There is something I want to show you,’ he said. ‘Down this way.’
She followed, her steps lighter. ‘So much space...’ she murmured.
‘I suppose things can feel crowded aboard ship.’
‘Very much so,’ she responded. ‘And even in the temple there were people everywhere.’
Someone had always been watching, and many would take any excuse to discipline the half-children.
‘Do you miss it?’
‘What?’
‘The temple. The boat. This must feel very different to you.’
‘Everything is different, and yet so much feels the same. The clothes and language are different, but one city feels the same as the next to me. So many people, all thinking about their own lives, all crowded together.’ She looked around. ‘But I am learning your customs.’
‘Indeed, you are. I do not think I could be half so easy in another place as you are here.’
He overestimated how ‘easy’ she was, but she smiled to pretend he was correct. ‘Have you travelled much?’ she asked.
‘I have. I took my Grand Tour of the continent several years ago. My tutor insisted I go, despite Napoleon’s antics.’ He shook his head. ‘Looking back, it was not as safe a choice as we thought, but obviously I survived. I think I was lucky, rather than wise, and I do have very fond memories of Italy.’
She faced him, intrigued by his far-off look. ‘What was it like?’
‘I was a young man of title and wealth. It was all parties and new foods. Parties and lovely weather. Parties and unbearable heat and beautiful women.’
‘I thought you went with a tutor.’
He chuckled. ‘I did. But he was a tutor who enjoyed—’
‘Parties?’
‘Yes.’ He focused again on her. ‘But I have never been so far as China. Or even Africa. You must have seen so much.’
‘I saw views from the boat, and I tasted strange foods, but I was rarely allowed to explore.’
‘That must have chafed.’
‘No,’ she said. ‘I preferred the safety of a place I knew, with people who would protect me. I loved hearing tales when the sailors returned, but I had no desire to risk myself by exploring.’
‘Truly? I would guess that anyone who jumps the riggings like you do would want to test herself.’
‘On land? As a lone girl? No.’
She had seen enough in China by the time she was ten to know that she would not be safe in a city she did not know. Not without the protection of wealthy men and strong servants. Better to stay on the ship and listen to tales from a place of safety. Life aboard ship had been dangerous enough. She had not needed to seek out more dangers just for their novelty.
‘I envy your freedom to wander as you chose.’
He shrugged. ‘As I said, it was not so prudent a choice. I was young and stupid, and we paid the price.’
His tone was bitter, but not closed, so she dared ask the question. ‘What price?’
‘My tutor was murdered. I was nearly so.’
She winced. ‘I am sorry. Was it the French?’
She had learned from her father about the war with Napoleon.
‘That would have been more honourable. No, it was footpads. I lost my purse, not my life. My tutor was cut. Not so bad a wound, or so we thought, but then infection set in. He died eight days later, and I had to manage my return to England when I hadn’t the least idea how it was done. If we hadn’t squandered so much on wine and women I would have done better. I learned very quickly that my title did not protect me from much of anything.’
She watched him closely as he spoke, seeing shadows in his eyes. He knew, then, what it was to live in danger.
‘How long did it take you to return home?’
‘Several months.’ His lips twisted in a rueful expression. ‘Not so long in the grand scheme of things, but I have never forgotten what it was like to be hungry or afraid.’
A difficult lesson, then, but she could see he was a better man for it.
Then, before she could say more, he looked up and gestured ahead. ‘Ah, here we are. What do you think?’