Chapter 34
Kalina
It had to be done before the Windham luncheon.
That was the only time Kalina could be assured of having enough time and there being no interruptions.
Fiona’s new governess, Miss Temple, was doing lessons with her, Julianna and Emma were with their dance instructor, and Hereford was alone in the study.
There was no guarantee that another such opportunity would arise between the luncheon and the Camden Masquerade this evening.
Which meant it had to be now.
Heart beating a rapid tattoo in her chest, Kalina knocked on the study door. Waiting until she heard the slightly muffled invitation to ‘come in’ to open it, all the while wondering if she was going to lose her courage and run.
Having to face her husband and make such a scandalous request was not something she would have ever imagined herself doing.
None of this felt like her, like the person she’d always been.
But, on the other hand, she did not know that she had ever wanted something for herself so badly as she wanted her husband’s forgiveness.
Opening the door and facing him, seeing him in the light of day, watching the startled expression fall over his face before he blinked and returned it to a neutral one, she felt far more vulnerable than she did when she was naked in the dark with him.
Perhaps it would have been easier to say the words then, to make her request at night, if only he would let her speak.
But he would not.
Which meant she had to do it now.
He got to his feet as Kalina closed the door behind her.
“Yes, ah… what can I do for you?” There was something odd about the way he stumbled over his words, like the sentence came out unfinished even though it was complete.
Kalina went to stand in front of his desk, hands folded over each other in front of her so that they would not show how she was trembling.
She was wearing her favorite, most comfortable morning gown, the light pink and white striped muslin that made her feel airy and bright.
Even that did not help with the urge to turn and run or to stammer out something else and flee.
She had to get the words out, right now, or she would never be able to say them.
“I want you to spank me.” They came out in a rush, tumbling over each other, barely intelligible even to her own ears. Hereford stared at her. She stared back at him.
She was going to have to say it again.
She could not possibly say it again.
Kalina was about to retreat when her husband shook himself out of his stunned silence.
“Did you just say you want me to spank you?” He sounded both shocked and confused.
“Tiffany suggested it.” Well. She had not meant to say that, but they were the first words that came to mind.
Blame her friend for the audacious request. “As… as a penance?” Fumbling for what she meant, she came out with the wrong word.
Or perhaps it was correct. She might not have known about her father’s plans, but she still felt guilt.
If he spanked her, he might feel better about it all… and so might she.
“As a penance,” he repeated slowly, like he was turning the words over in his head as he said them. “Yes. I can see that. That…” He paused and took a deep breath. “I accept your offer.”
For a moment, it was as though she could not understand what he’d said. The words took several heartbeats to process. Only when he pushed his chair back from the desk and sat down in it, while she was still standing, and put his hand on his thigh, did she fully comprehend his response.
He accepted my offer.
He wants to spank me.
As penance.
Kalina knew what a spanking was, but other than a one-time swat from her mother as a child when she’d stolen a gulab jamun from the kitchen, she’d never received one. The sweet dough ball had been more than worth the slight sting and her mother’s half-exasperated, half-amused scold.
Feeling as though some strange entity had taken over her body, Kalina found herself walking around the desk and facing her husband.
Hereford tilted his head back and patted his thigh.
The dark brown trousers he was wearing went well with the dusky rose waistcoat over his crisp white shirt.
The lighter brown jacket he had on at breakfast had already been removed and was draped over the back of his chair.
He looked impeccably handsome. The light in his eyes as he looked up at her gave her hope that perhaps Tiffany had been correct about this tactic.
“I… just, over your lap?” Her hands fluttered uncertainly at her sides as she looked at him.
He nodded his head, patting his thigh at the same time. The stern expression on his face made her feel even more jumpy, despite the desire that she could see in his gaze.
Taking a deep breath, Kalina awkwardly put herself over his lap.
At least, she felt awkward. If he thought her so, he did not comment on it.
Instead, he moved his hand out of her way, and she heard him let out a long breath as she settled her stomach against his thighs, her side against his stomach.
Putting her hands out in front of her, against the softness of the rug beneath his desk, she wriggled to try to feel less vulnerable… but it was no use.
Especially when he tugged her skirts up to reveal her drawers. Despite the brightness of the room, she could not see him in her current position, but she was suddenly, acutely, horribly aware of how he would be able to see every bit of her. There was no darkness to hide behind in here.
The feeling of him parting her drawers at the split, revealing her buttocks to his gaze, and the hand that came down to rest over the curve of one cheek, made her shudder.
Though she tried to turn her head and crane her neck, hoping to get a glimpse of her husband’s expression, she was unable to see it well enough.
All of his focus was on her exposed bottom.
Heat filled her cheeks and pooled between her thighs, which confused her. She had not expected to feel the same desire as she did at night, when he came to her bed, yet her body was responding in the same manner as it did then.
He lifted his hand.
Brought it down on her bottom.
She cried out, as much in surprise as at the impact.
It did hurt. Stung even.
Yet the immediate sensation that followed was a kind of rush of excitement. More emotional than physical, despite the fact that it started there.
His hand came down again.
And again.
Kalina squirmed as the heat in her bottom began to grow, the sting increasing every time his palm slapped against her flesh. It did hurt, yet the arousal between her thighs grew with every swat. Tiffany had not mentioned this aspect of being spanked.
Had she not experienced it?
This was supposed to be a penance.
Was Kalina supposed to be enjoying it?
Perhaps she was not, yet she could not change her body’s reactions.
Her heart was beating faster and faster as she panted for breath.
Squirming on her husband’s lap, she could feel the slickness between her legs, rubbing together, pressing together, adding growing pleasure to the stinging heat blooming across her cheeks.
His hand came down again, right in the center, and Kalina moaned, even as tears sprang to her eyes from the intoxicating mix of pleasure and pain.
Nathanial
Hearing his wife’s moan, Nathanial froze.
Uncertain of how she would respond to being spanked, he’d been holding back, peppering her bottom with firm, crisp swats because he did not know how much she would be able to take. Hearing her moan…
He looked down at her bottom, then dipped his fingers between her thighs.
She was wet.
Silent thunder roared in his ears, a white rushing noise that drowned out the rest of the world as it turned over, then righted itself again, but with an entirely new perspective from what he’d had before. As though, suddenly, he could see everything in a new light.
Perhaps his wife had trapped him into marriage, but that did not mean she was the wrong wife for him. She had just gone about it in the wrong way.
Though he’d been willing to accept her offer of being spanked as a penance, he’d also been thrown off by the suggestion.
Spanking his wife was not something he’d looked for because there was no way to know what a debutante would find acceptable.
He had not even dared to hope that he would find a wife who would accept, much less enjoy, such a thing.
Now, here she was, over his lap, aroused and moaning from the punishment he was applying to her upturned bottom. His cock, already half-hard from having her over his lap and finally being able to see the parts of her that had always been hidden by darkness, was instantly, painfully erect.
Nathanial gritted his teeth against the shocking surge of lust that ran through him. Never in his life had his desires been so tested.
But she’d wanted to pay a penance.
His hand came down harder, stinging his palm.
And his wife moaned again, shuddering against him, the stiffness of her stays under her dress rubbing against the bulge at the front of his trousers and exacerbating his own problem.
He spanked her again. And again. Her skin darkened and heated under the steady swats, and with every increase in intensity, it did nothing but increase her moans and cries.
“Oh, please…” Her soft gasp was not a plea to stop.
No, it was the same plea she made in the darkness of night, when he was in her bed, pleasuring her with his mouth.
It had the same effect now as it did then.
Nathanial hauled her up off his lap, sitting her on the desk before him, and she emitted a little squeal as her bottom met the hard wood.
She looked up at him, dark eyes shiny with sparkling tears, a single track running down her cheek, her swollen lips parted.
They’d always met in the dark. He’d never had anything but his imagination to tell him how she looked.