Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
“Have you a date yet?” Beatrice asked.
“A date?” Clara replied, placing her teacup on the table.
“Yes, for the wedding.” Beatrice raised her eyebrows suggestively. Clara forced out a breath and licked her lips.
“Never mind a date; I have not received a proposal yet. I shouldn’t get your hopes up, Beatrice.”
“You don’t have to be like that. I’m sure it’s only a matter of time. How could His Grace do anything but propose to you? I’m sure he’s only delaying because he doesn’t want to seem too eager. That can lead to all sorts of rumors.”
“I should hope there wouldn’t be any rumors about us at all, and you should certainly not be partaking in gossip like that. Haven’t I warned you about how damaging that can be?”
Beatrice rolled her eyes. “You’re no fun. Gossip is just stories, no different than the books Aunt Lydia reads.”
“The difference is that gossip is about real people. You wouldn’t like it if people gossiped about you, I assume?” Clara asked.
Beatrice flicked her hair and rolled her shoulders.
“I’m not sure about that. I think I would rather enjoy knowing that everyone in London had my name on their lips.”
“You should be careful what you wish for,” Clara warned.
Beatrice looked unconcerned, however, for she was still young enough to believe that she was invincible, and that bad things only ever happened to other people.
Clara had tried talking things over with her, but Beatrice remained obstinate.
It seemed as though experience would have to teach her.
They were interrupted shortly after this by Alfred, who poked his head through the door.
“Clara, you’ve received a visitor, Sir Lionel Mercer. He told me that he had made your acquaintance at a recent ball.”
Clara smiled. Lionel had indeed been pleasant, and it was a surprise that he should call. He had indicated his desire to see her again as they finished their dance, but she assumed that it had been an empty promise.
Just before she was about to accept, she thought of Gerald. She was supposed to be courting him, and what would the ton think if she received another caller?
Then again, was she supposed to be rude for the sake of a lie? There was no harm in receiving a visitor. As she had just stated to Beatrice, there had been no proposal forthcoming from Gerald, and there never would.
“I shall be there presently,” Clara said.
“I never would have imagined it, Clara. All this time you have been waiting for one suitor, and now two come along at once,” Beatrice said. Clara simply arched an eyebrow and left the room.
Alfred walked with her to the sitting room, where a maid carried some tea. Lionel was perusing a bookshelf when he noticed her presence. His round face lit up with a smile, and he approached her gladly, bowing.
“Miss Sterling, it is a pleasure to see you again. I hope it is not forward of me to say how you have been in my thoughts since we danced together. You showed unparalleled grace.”
“You flatter me with your compliments, Sir,” Clara said, gesturing for him to sit down. Alfred remained near the door. Lionel pushed back the tail of his jacket and sat with an upright back, his hands steepled together.
“And you flatter me by accepting me into your home. I don’t mean to take up too much of your time, but I hoped that you would grant me the opportunity of getting to know you a little better.”
“I see no harm in that,” Clara replied.
Lionel asked her questions about her family, her past, and her current interests.
He was a pleasant gentleman and possessed a jovial sense of humor, but Clara couldn’t stop comparing him to Gerald.
Lionel’s face was a little softer, his shoulders a little rounder.
His humor was gentle and welcoming rather than teasing and subtle, as Gerald’s could be.
When their eyes met, she did not see the same kind of fire that existed in Gerald’s gaze.
Guilt lined her heart. She believed that everyone should be judged on their own merits, and yet here she was, judging a perfectly acceptable young man inferior based on nothing but shallow considerations.
Was this going to be the way of things for the rest of her life?
Would men always fail to measure up to her phantom suitor?
Even after their ruse had long been abolished, would she pretend that she was still locked in a courtship?
While marriage was not a priority, she was not willing to dismiss the possibility entirely, should the right man reveal himself to her. Lionel certainly seemed earnest, and she felt she ought to feel flattered that he was paying her this attention.
When conversation turned to the orphanage, Clara mentioned how Gerald, although in conversation she referred to him as the Duke of Clemont, was helping with repairs as he owns the lease.
“I see, is that how you made his acquaintance?” Lionel asked.
“It is,” Clara said, pausing a little, feeling that it wasn’t enough of a lie to be guilty about.
“I can see I have owned the wrong properties then,” Lionel said with a smile.
Then he paused and cocked his head. “I would like to venture something, Miss Sterling. I certainly hope I am not broaching the boundaries of propriety, and if you take offence, do not hesitate to tell me at once, and I will show myself out as a disgraced individual, but might I inquire as to whether the good Duke has made a proposal for your hand?”
“He has not,” Clara replied. Her throat tightened, and it felt as though her tongue had swollen to twice its size. Lionel looked relieved.
“In that case, might I-”
Before he could ask the question, the butler announced that Gerald had arrived. He came striding into the room, greeting Alfred with a firm handshake. The wide smile fell from his face as soon as he laid eyes on Lionel. Lionel and Clara both rose from their seats.
“Your Grace, it’s a pleasure to see you again. I’m Sir Lionel Mercer; you may remember me from the recent dance, where we shared the pleasure of Miss Sterling’s company.”
“Yes, I remember. It’s good to see you again,” Gerald said in a forced tone. His jaw was clenched, and everything was rigid. A heavy glare fell upon Clara. “I wasn’t aware you were expecting another caller today,” he said.
Alfred chuckled and came to stand beside Gerald, patting his back.
“I’m sure we can all handle this like gentlemen.
There’s no need for any animosity. Clara isn’t married yet, after all,” Alfred said, his keen eyes staring at Gerald.
It was then that Clara realized what Alfred intended.
He hoped that by inviting Lionel in, it would expedite a proposal from Gerald.
Sadly, he had no idea that his plan was doomed to fail.
Clara studied Gerald’s face, looking for any sign of discomfort or displeasure. She saw nothing. There was only a placid mask, as though he was a still lake that no wind could disturb.
“I do not wish to cause any offense, of course,” Lionel said smoothly. “But there is a public lecture next week focusing on the architecture of cathedrals. I hoped you might find it fascinating, and wondered if you would deign to join me.”
Clara opened her mouth to reply, but Gerald beat her to it.
“On which day is this occurring?” he asked.
Lionel slowly turned his head. “Wednesday,” he replied, a thin smile upon his face.
“Ah, I’m afraid Miss Sterling is already engaged. We have been invited to a garden party.”
“Is that so?” Lionel said.
Clara angled her head towards Gerald. “I do not remember you mentioning this to me.”
“Nevertheless, we are expected.”
Clara stared at him curiously, but did not wish to discuss the matter in front of Lionel.
“Very well. I do apologize, Sir Lionel, but it seems as though I am already engaged. Perhaps another time.”
“Yes, perhaps.” Lionel inclined his head. “Should another event occur that I think will be of interest to you, I shall stop by again---presuming that you have no previous engagement, of course.” Lionel directed these words to Gerald, as though setting down a warning.
“That will be most welcome. Thank you for calling,” Clara said. Alfred thanked him as well. Lionel and Gerald nodded to each other stiffly. Lionel exited the room, he and Alfred sharing a short conversation at the door. Clara took the opportunity to speak to Gerald in a low voice.
“I do not have any recollection of this invitation. Did you invent it to prevent me from attending the public lecture with Sir Lionel?”
“Certainly not,” he replied in a firm tone, and his lips became pinched at the corners. “It must have slipped my mind. But attending a lecture with another man would not serve us in convincing the ton of our courtship.”
“Perhaps not, although there was no suggestion from Sir Lionel that it would have been anything other than an intellectual pursuit. And I should remind you that once our agreement has ended, I will be free to accept invitations from any gentlemen I choose.”
“Of course,” Gerald replied thinly. Clara studied his expression, looking for any chink in his armor, but she could find none.
The fact that he seemed so unmoved by things disappointed her.
Was there no fire in him? Was there no jealousy?
If she saw the flare of envy in his eyes, then perhaps it would be easier to navigate her own feelings.
Once Sir Lionel left, Alfred turned back to Clara and Gerald. They spoke for some time about the progress of repairs at the orphanage, as well as Clara’s recent visit to Clemont Hall. Upon describing the gardens, Alfred beamed.
“They sound like wonderful grounds, the perfect setting for a wedding celebration,” he said. Clara and Gerald wore the same awkward smile, and Gerald left soon after this. Clara settled into a chair with her sketchbook, but it was difficult to concentrate on anything other than Gerald.
Mary entered with some tea and crumpets, along with a warm smile.
“So you had two callers today,” she said, her eyes twinkling with excitement.
“I did. Sir Lionel Mercer invited me to a public lecture, although Gerald and I already have a previous engagement so I was unable to accept his invitation.”
“From what your father says, Sir Lionel seems quite keen on you. What a turnaround it is.”
“Yes, although of course my attention is focused on Gerald,” Clara said.
“Of course.” Mary sipped her tea and then placed her hands in her lap. “There is nothing wrong with having a choice, however.”
“No, unless that choice is difficult.”
“Is the choice difficult?”
Clara thought about it a moment. “I do not believe so, but both men are different, and would offer my life different shapes. However, I feel bad about thinking of Sir Lionel as an alternative, only to be pursued should Gerald decline to offer me a proposal. It seems rude to think of him as a second choice.”
“The only thing that matters is that the choice is made eventually. If Gerald does not propose, then he was not the right man for you. The proper companion comes to us eventually, Clara. I know that well enough with Alfred. He may have been my second husband, but he was my first love and he came along at the right time for me. Just wait and see how things unfold. They have a way of working out,” she said, placing a reassuring hand on Clara’s arm.
Clara smiled with thanks, although she wasn’t sure Mary understood properly, which was no fault of her own.
Clara had not been entirely truthful with her.
If she developed genuine feelings for Gerald, would it even be fair to allow Sir Lionel to court her?
Would she simply have to wait for the feelings to fade away? How long would she have to wait?
She was dreadfully afraid she knew the answer.