Chapter 27
Chapter Twenty-Seven
“Come, John. It is a beautiful day. Let us enjoy it,” Lydia said.
Lydia took John to the garden and pushed him back and forth in the pram. He stared at the sky, reaching for it with his fingers. Victor had left on business early that morning, declaring that he would try to find out something about John’s mother.
Lydia had a heavy heart, still unsure if she wanted John to be reunited with the woman who had left him so coldly.
It was selfish of her, she knew, but she told herself that she only wanted what was best for John.
Perhaps if they did find the mother, it would be worth having a conversation with her first. She would suggest it to Victor when he returned.
She was certain he would agree to a practical idea like that.
“It’s a beautiful day,” Georgia remarked as she came out to join Lydia.
She fed John, and the two women chatted for a while.
It was a relaxing day and perhaps the first one where Lydia did not feel a care in the world.
She was here with John, had enjoyed a wonderful day with her family, and even she and Victor had not bickered.
It was almost as though this was a glimpse of the life they could share together, but every time she dared think of the future, reality pulled her back with a painful sting, reminding her that things were not going to work out the way she wanted.
Soon enough, she would be back in London permanently, her name stained by the ordeal even when the truth came out, and no upstanding man would want to marry her.
Or she would be with Victor for the rest of her life.
It did not seem as disagreeable as it first did, even if she knew that he did not return her feelings.
She wasn’t sure it was possible for him to do so, and this compelled her to keep her feelings guarded.
But they sprung out like tendrils of a plant through a hard surface, and she was not sure for how long she could keep them at bay.
Lydia returned inside to take care of the correspondence sent to the house.
She leafed through them all, thinking to herself that many of these would have been from people who wanted to boast that they had hosted Lydia and Victor, trying to garner some buoyancy within the ton by gaining new insights about their marriage and the baby.
It made Lydia sick, and she dismissed these immediately.
It wasn’t as though they had much time for more social engagements anyway.
They would be returning to Brighton soon enough.
However, then she came across a gift from Edmund. It contained two tickets to a performance of Romeo a story Lydia had always loved. Their love may have been fleeting, but at least they were able to experience it.
“Did you find anything?” Lydia asked when Victor returned, her voice hitching on emotion, fearing his answer.
“No, I did not. It seems as though this woman has made herself impossible to find,” he said although he did not speak with frustration or anger. In fact, he seemed entirely calm about it, and Lydia wondered how she should interpret this.
“I’m sure with enough effort you will be able to root her out.
I did have a thought though. Perhaps it would be a good idea to speak with her before we hand John over.
At least then we can gauge her suitability to care for John and what arrangements need to be made,” Lydia suggested, her voice shaking as she thought about giving John to another woman.
Victor inclined his head. “That is a wise decision although for now my agents must continue the search. We can return to Brighton tomorrow if you wish.”
“Actually, I was hoping that we might stay one more day. Edmund gifted us tickets to a performance of Romeo & Juliet. It is my favorite play, and I would love to go.”
“Very well. I see no reason why not. I don’t believe I have ever seen it performed although I am aware of the story.”
“That doesn’t surprise me. The theater does not strike me as your preferred type of entertainment.”
“No, it’s more Harry’s thing,” he said although he seemed irritated by this, but she shook the thoughts away. He intended to move, but Lydia continued speaking.
“I was reading the playbill, and it seems as though this is a special performance. It heralds the return of a famous actress, one who defined the role. Apparently, she took a sabbatical from performing for a year, but now she’s back.
Juliet Fane. I suppose with a name like that she was born to play the role,” Lydia said, smiling at her witty comment.
Victor did not say anything in response, but he froze in place, and all the color drained from his skin. He looked a little nauseous, and then he turned away sharply.
“Actually, perhaps we should not go. We have been in London long enough. There is much business in Brighton I must deal with, and you are right, I should make haste in speaking with Theodore. He has waited for this reunion long enough, and who am I to stand in the way of his happiness? I’m sure there will be other performances we can witness. This one we shall have to miss.”
There was tension in his voice. In fact, there was tension all over his body.
He raised a hand and scratched the back of his neck, failing to meet her gaze.
Every word had an edge to it, as though they were cutting through the air.
She hadn’t seen him this agitated since the night they had met when everyone saw them in his chambers and the scandal began.
His about turn didn’t make sense to her at all. He’d readily agreed to attend the play, so why change his mind now?
“Victor, why are you acting like this?” she asked.
“I’m not acting like anything. It’s just that I thought rashly before.
We must consider all the practicalities of the situation.
Besides, John has been away from Brighton for a time, and I’m sure he would like to be back in familiar surroundings,” Victor said.
Lydia narrowed her eyes, suspecting that he was using John to try and convince her but not knowing why?
It had all changed when she mentioned Juliet Fane’s name. Did he know her? Was she ever important to him? It was a reminder that in many ways he was still a stranger to her, and no matter how close they became, she had to remain guarded.
It was the only way she could survive, for there was still a suspicion that John could have been Victor’s child, and all of his posturing was just to deflect against his flouting of Society’s rules. If so, Lydia wasn’t about to let him get away with it. She lifted her chin.
“I wish to attend. You may return to Brighton if you wish, but I am going to the play. If nothing else, it would be rude to spurn my brother’s gift.
I’m sure that attending the play alone would end up raising questions among the ton, but if you are willing to withstand that then so be it.
I will see you back in Brighton the day after tomorrow,” she said, testing his limits and making it clear that she wasn’t going to back down just because something made him flustered.
Victor glared at her, and he spoke in a biting tone.
“Very well,” he said, but she couldn’t help but feel as though something had shifted between them. It was as though she stood on shifting sand. Just when she thought her footing was secure, something happened to affect her balance.