Chapter Twenty-Two
"Goodness, that storm was fierce," Grandmamma said at breakfast the next morning. "I’m amazed the house didn’t sustain any damage!"
"I barely slept," Charity said, tucking into her breakfast heartily.
Constance had also barely slept, but she had no appetite either. She couldn’t help but think she had made a terrible mistake in rejecting Ezra once more – that perhaps she had been wrong.
But then her thoughts changed again. Perhaps he didn’t prefer Charity to her, but there would always be someone prettier, ready to catch his eye. She had to accept that; she could not see how it would ever work. She would just end up getting her heart broken.
"I think I’ll go into Coral Cove this morning," Grandmamma said. "Check that no one sustained any serious damage. We’re so exposed here by the sea."
"I’ll come with you," Constance said, keen to have something to take her mind off her troubles.
"I have some letters to write," Charity said, "so I’ll stay here, if you don’t mind."
It was a slow journey into the village. They had to take the carriage, for Grandmamma no longer rode, and that always took longer, for there were paths it could not traverse.
Even on the accessible ones, there was clear evidence of the storm damage – trees fallen on the road, branches blocking their path.
"I hope no one was hurt," Constance commented, as it became clear that the storm had been as bad as it had sounded in the night.
"As do I. Let’s go to the inn – the landlord there always knows what’s happening. You’ve stayed there before, haven’t you?"
Constance nodded. "Yes, when we visited Northumberland to look at castles a few years ago. It was where I first met the Duchess of Coldingham – although she wasn’t called that then."
"It seems rather a simple place for your father to choose to stay."
"Well, he didn’t have much of a choice. I wanted to see the castles in the area, and there aren’t many establishments to stay in. It was clean and pleasant enough, and I remember the food being excellent."
A hush descended on the inn as Grandmamma and Constance entered, and Constance presumed it was not a common occurrence for a dowager countess to enter.
"Lady Basingstoke," the innkeeper said with a smile. "It’s good to see you. What can we do for you?"
"I’m glad to see you unaffected by the storm, Mr Smith," Grandmamma said, glancing around. "But that was what I came here to ask, since you always have such a good knowledge of the area. Do you know if anyone sustained any real damage, or needs any help?"
"We’ve been fairly lucky in the Cove, Your Ladyship," Mr Smith said. "But then, we’re a bit more sheltered here. I heard from a travelling salesman that Stanborough Castle has taken a beating – although of course it’s already ruined.
And Gracewood Castle, too. Apparently he saw damage to the roof, although he didn’t investigate any further. You know what the Earl can be like."
Constance’s gaze darted towards her grandmother. There had been damage at Gracewood Castle. What if somebody was hurt? What if Ezra…
"Thank you, Mr Smith," Grandmamma said. "I can always rely on you to have the latest news. We won’t take up any more of your time."
Outside the inn, Constance turned to Grandmamma. "I must go and see if he needs any help – if he’s all right…"
"I’m not sure you’ll be much help in repairing a roof," her grandmother said wryly. "But of course, if you feel you must go, then you must. I would like to go home first, if you don’t mind."
Constance nodded, although she would have much preferred to go straight there now that she knew he had been impacted by the storm. However, it would be easier without her grandmother in tow. She could take a horse and ride over there, instead of taking the slow route with the carriage.
She just wanted to see that he was well – and safe.
◆◆◆
"Have you found any further damage?" Ezra asked Soames, who had been conducting a search of the castle with some of the other staff, after the damage to the roof and the leaking that ensued had been discovered.
It had been in the nursery, a room which Ezra never entered, but which held such painful memories.
"A little, my lord," Soames said in his usual calm fashion. "The roof has been damaged in a few areas, I’m afraid. And the stables have also sustained damage. Luckily, none of the horses were injured, but we did lose one, who has since been recovered."
"Well, at least there’s been no loss of life. We must prioritise fixing the stables – can you see to it?"
"I’ve already sent for labourers from the village, my lord."
"Excellent. And I will send out for quotes for the roof – it’s going to be expensive, I’m sure." He sighed. "If you can just ensure that whatever is in the rooms will not be damaged if it rains again, I’d be grateful."
"Yes, my lord."
Ezra was happy to leave it in Soames’s confident hands, and he would do anything to avoid going into the nursery to deal with the problem himself.
◆◆◆
As Constance rode, she felt sick to her stomach.
What if something had happened to Ezra? She presumed it would have been mentioned by the innkeeper if the damage had included injury, but she couldn’t be sure.
She shouldn’t have walked out on him when he danced with Charity at the ball.
She should have told him that she loved him, even if there was always a chance he wouldn’t say it back.
Because now she thought she would regret it far more if she didn’t tell him how she felt than she would if she did.
When she arrived at Gracewood Castle, the damage to the roof was obvious from the front. There was also clearly damage to the stables, and a nervous-looking filly was tethered to a post, clearly to stop her escaping through the battered stable wall.
She dismounted her horse alone, before anyone came out to see who the visitor was, and hurried to knock on the door. Ezra’s butler answered, and if he was surprised to see her, he didn’t show it.
"Lady Constance," he said with a bow of his head. "I’m afraid Lord Gracewood is busy dealing with the damage from the storm."
"But he wasn’t hurt in it?" she asked hurriedly.
Soames shook his head. "No, my lady. No one was hurt, thankfully. Some damage has been sustained, as you can probably see, but no lives lost or injured."
"Thank goodness," Constance said with a sigh of relief. It seemed silly now to have hurried over here, but she couldn’t ignore the fear that had filled her heart at the thought of Ezra being hurt.
"Is there anything I can do to help? I’d like to be useful, now I’m here."
"If you’ll just wait here, my lady, I will see whether Lord Gracewood is free, so you can make your kind offer to him."
He showed her into the hallway before striding off to find Lord Gracewood, and Constance glanced up at the roof, pleased to see there was no damage in the entrance.
She wondered how much of the castle had suffered, and how difficult it would be to repair.
It was a beautiful castle – it would be a shame if it fell into a state of ruin.
She had no idea whether Lord Gracewood’s finances could stretch to the fixing of large parts of the castle, but she hoped they could.
When Ezra appeared in the hallway, her heart began to race and she could not help but smile at him – and her heart was warmed when he immediately smiled back.
"Lady Constance," he said, and she wondered if his use of her title was because Soames was probably still in the vicinity, or whether the formality was because she had left him yet again. "I wasn’t expecting to see you."
"I heard that Gracewood had sustained damage during the storm, and I wanted to check…if you needed anything."
He smiled wryly. "Of course, your love of the castle would ensure you wished to check on it."
It’s not just my love of the castle, she thought to herself, but did not voice it aloud.
"But it is very kind of you to come," Ezra continued. "I was sorry you had to leave the ball last week before I could dance with you."
She bit her lip and looked down at the floor. "I made a foolish assumption," she admitted. "And I’m sorry."
"Can I know what that assumption was?"
Her cheeks flamed hot and probably bright red, and she wondered if she could really say what was in her heart to Lord Gracewood here in the open hallway, where anyone could pass by. She took a deep breath; she thought she had to.
"I thought you preferred my sister to me," she admitted, feeling that it sounded foolish now that she said it out loud. "I…" It was so hard to speak with him about such matters when she had no idea whether he felt for her as she did for him.
"I thought I had made my feelings clear, and I apologise if I had not," Ezra said rather formally. "I certainly have no interest in your sister. I asked her to dance out of politeness, and I asked her first because she was thrown in my path. That is all."
Constance nodded. "That’s what Charity said. But I feel—"
A footman came hurrying past with two metal buckets, and she fell silent, unable to discuss this in front of other people.
"Was there much damage?" she asked.
"A fair amount. It will take time to be repaired – the staff are busy making sure nothing is destroyed by further rain. But thankfully no one was hurt, no animals lost."
"I saw the stable."
He nodded. "One of the horses nearly got away, but luckily she was caught."
"I’d like to help, if I can. Will you let me? Will you show me the damage?"
Ezra cocked his head to one side. "I will, if we can finish our earlier conversation."
Constance swallowed and nodded. The conversation had to be had – she would just prefer it to be in private.
She followed him up the stairs, along a corridor, and into an unused bedroom, where light from outside was coming through a hole in the roof.
"The damage is mainly in the attics, but there are some rooms which sit directly beneath the outer roof, and those were weak, it seems," he said, then turned to her. "Now, what were you saying?"
"I keep… I keep letting myself think that there is something between us. That you…that you are interested in me, as a woman, as I am interested in you."