Chapter 8
The tears that had come after her dance with Lord Surrey had not been permitted to escape until Beatrice had returned home and was alone in her bedchamber.
Now, as she sat in her room the following afternoon and gazed at her reflection in the mirror, Beatrice saw the evidence of her tears and lack of sleep in the paleness of her skin and the shadows under her eyes.
Her maid had done very well in preparing her for the day, but there was nothing she could do about the confusion and upset that tore through Beatrice’s soul.
Why did he insist upon dancing with me when he is courting another?
Having had no desire to eat, Beatrice had remained abed until duty had demanded she rise. With a weight still in her soul and her heart struggling to piece itself back together, Beatrice forced herself to her feet and made her way downstairs, waiting for Lady Norah’s carriage to arrive.
“An excellent evening last night, I thought.”
Beatrice tried to smile as her brother greeted her in the hallway.
“You must have been very tired indeed, given how long you remained in your rooms!” Lord Warwickshire put a hand on Beatrice’s shoulder, looked into her face, and then frowned, his smile disappearing in an instant. “You are unwell, sister?”
She shook her head, not trusting her voice.
If her brother knew of all the turmoil within her, then she was sure he would either be displeased with her for having such lingering emotions or irritated with Lord Surrey – and she did not want that!
Her brother had a strong mind and often spoke or acted without giving it too much thought, and she certainly did not want him to go and speak with Lord Surrey without considering it first!
“What is it, then?” Lord Warwickshire’s voice had softened. “Are you weary after the many days of dancing and the like? We do not have to attend any occasion this evening, if you do not wish it.”
“But I must find a suitable match, must I not?” Beatrice replied, hearing the wobble in her voice but praying her brother did not. “The only way I will be able to find a suitable gentleman is if I attend such things.”
A frown tugged at his forehead. “You have had many dutiful admirers thus far, Beatrice.”
She looked down at her hands. Her brother was quite right to say so, for she had not only had many callers, some had come to call on more than one occasion these last two weeks – but she had not found herself with any real interest in any of them.
“I would never push you towards someone that you did not think suited you well, Beatrice.” Lord Warwickshire lifted her chin gently, looking down at her with a brotherly affection that settled Beatrice’s heart a little. “It is not something that I would demand of you.”
“Thank you, brother.” Beatrice closed her eyes and then smiled as best she could. “I am grateful to know that.”
“And if you are still thinking of another, then might I suggest that you give yourself time to get over the disappointment that you must be feeling at present?”
Beatrice’s throat grew tight as she looked away from her brother, her fingers twisting together in front of her.
Clearly, he knew very well that she still had an interest in Lord Surrey although she had done all she could to set him out of her heart and mind.
Until last evening, they had not spoken nor even been in company together, which was why she simply could not understand why he had asked her to dance!
“You can speak to me about anything you need to, Beatrice. I want you to know that I shall never judge you nor criticize you. Matters of the heart are difficult indeed.”
“They seem to be, yes,” Beatrice admitted, softly. “Lord Surrey was very attentive to me so many months ago, and I will confess that I was drawn to him.”
“And now, he courts another but still stands up with you – and you, being a lady, cannot refuse to dance with him,” Lord Warwickshire said, as Beatrice’s lips tugged to one side in frustration. “A difficulty indeed. If you wish, I can speak with him? I can – ”
“No, please do not.” Beatrice put one hand on her brother’s arm, beseechingly. “I do not think it would do any good.”
It took a long moment for her brother to reply, but when he did, it was with agreement. “Very well. Now, where are you off to this fine afternoon?”
“I am going to the bookshop with Lady Norah.” Relieved that her brother had chosen not to press her on the subject, she offered him a small smile, a trifle surprised at the way his eyebrows lifted and a smile spread across his face. “You are not thinking of joining us, I hope?”
“I thought I might, yes.” Lord Warwickshire’s face pinked as Beatrice narrowed her eyes at him. “But I shall not.”
“Is this… is this because of Lady Norah?”
With a wave of his hand, her brother dismissed Beatrice’s words. “Of course not. I was thinking only of coming into the heart of London, that is all.”
Astonished, Beatrice put one hand on his arm, meaning to ask him more about his reaction to hearing that Lady Norah was to be present, only for the butler to catch her attention.
“The carriage has arrived, my lady.”
She looked up at her brother. “We will discuss this again later, Warwickshire,” she said, a slight warning to her tone as a flush hit his cheeks.
“If there is an interest in Lady Norah, then might I suggest that you pursue it with a good deal more speed than you are evidencing at the moment? There are plenty of gentlemen eager to spend more time with her, of that I am quite certain!”
The way his smile dropped and his eyes rounded told her more than his explanation might have ever done. With a smile of her own, Beatrice made her way from his side and hurried to the carriage, feeling a little less dejected than she had been some minutes ago.
“I am just making my way up these stairs,” Beatrice told Lady Norah, as she nodded. “I have my maid with me.”
“I will join you soon.” Distracted by the book in her hand, Lady Norah gave Beatrice only a cursory glance before returning her attention to the book.
With a small smile, Beatrice climbed the stairs to the next floor, thinking to herself that she had never seen so many books all in one place!
This bookshop was quite extraordinary; Beatrice noted there were a good many nooks and crannies for people to hide away in, should they wish it.
A small sigh escaped her as her shoulders rounded, aware that the person she might wish to hide away with, as they had done once before, was now near enough spoken for.
Why could she not rid him from her heart and from her thoughts? It was most frustrating.
“Lord Surrey is doing exactly as intended.”
“That is good.”
Beatrice froze, her heart slowing as she stood by the side of the room.
“What delay is there?” the second voice said, as Beatrice turned herself slowly to face the books in front of her, keeping her head low as she plucked one book from the shelf and opened it.
Whoever these two gentlemen were, they were doing the very thing that Beatrice had only just thought of; hiding themselves away and having a private conversation – a conversation that she ought not to be listening to but could not help but overhear.
There was no thought in her mind about stepping away or leaving them to discuss this matter, whatever it was, in privacy.
If Lord Surrey had been mentioned, then she wanted to hear it!
“There is no delay,” said the first. “The engagement will take place very soon. He is verifying some documents, that is all.”
“The documents that force his hand, yes?”
Beatrice’s eyebrows lifted.
“Yes. But all will be found to be quite correct, I assure you.”
“Very good. Excuse me, I should take my leave.”
That made Beatrice’s heart slam into her chest, and snatching in her breath, she turned one page of the book and kept her gaze fixed to it, hoping that whoever it was would not realize that she had been able to hear them.
Someone collided with her, and she let out a yelp of surprise, her eyes landing on a fair-haired but dark-eyed gentleman who, scowling, threw up his hands in evident frustration.
“Whatever are you doing standing so near the corner? Do be more careful!”
With that, he was gone, and Beatrice, her heart still pounding furiously, regained her composure quickly, aware that there would be a second gentleman somewhere nearby. Breathing hard, she set one hand to her stomach and took in steadying breaths, calming herself.
“Are you quite all right, my lady?”
With a nod, Beatrice handed the book to her maid, seeing no one else and hoping that the other gentleman had taken himself away by another route. “I am well. Take this and let us return to Lady Norah. Mayhap she will have decided on her purchases also.”
With a nod, her maid turned towards the stairs, and Beatrice, unable to help herself, cast a glance around but saw no one.
A shadow shifted.
Her skin prickled, but there was no time to linger nor to see what the shadow might hold. Hurrying down the staircase, fear clutching at her, Beatrice quickly found Lady Norah and took her arm in her own, needing close company to reassure her.
“A gentleman knocked into me and did not offer even the slightest apology,” she said, by way of explanation. “I am a little overwhelmed.”
“How very rude!” Lady Norah exclaimed, looking at Beatrice with concern. “Shall we go to take tea somewhere? Or another ice at Gunters, mayhap?”
Beatrice hesitated. “I think I should like to return home shortly,” she said, slowly. “Would you like to join me for tea there?”
Lady Norah’s eyes rounded at the corners. “Did something more happen? Or are you injured?”
“I need to think,” Beatrice said, glancing over her shoulder for fear that the other gentleman, whoever he was, might now be nearby. “If we return home, then I can explain all.”
“Then let us go at once,” Lady Norah replied, handing her already purchased books to the maid and gesturing to the door. “And you can tell me everything that happened.”