39. Forever
FOREVER
Geraldine Cannon.
Demetrius’s grandmother had a name that showed the era she was born in, probably came from a long line of southerners who settled in Everwood way before I was thought of.
It was the same as my dad’s mom, but I never met the woman, only heard stories about the way she put my dad and uncle against one another.
That kind of upbringing turned them into the people they were today, and it was no different with me and Kai. We were nothing but products of our environment. I refused to be them in this new chapter of my life.
The monitors’ beeping pulled me from my thoughts.
I shifted in the chair at G’s bedside, watching the slow rise and fall of her chest as she slept.
Demetrius had dimmed the lights after I declined to go with him to get food, hoping his grandmother would wake while we were alone.
There was a question I needed an answer to.
My patience paid off after twenty minutes of waiting. Her eyelids fluttered open, and for a moment, she seemed confused by her surroundings. Then her gaze landed on me, recognition dawning slowly.
“Where’s Meechie?” she asked, voice a little scratchy.
I smiled at the nickname, picking up on it being used only by her.
“He went to grab us some food,” I said, helping her adjust the bed to a sitting position before handing over the water cup from the bedside tray. “I think your grandson might be more worried than he’s pretending to be.”
She accepted the water and took a small sip while studying me. Her light brown eyes were nothing like Demetrius’s, but somehow still the same. Still as intense as his, especially when he was trying to figure something out.
“I can guarantee it’s exactly that,” she said, setting the Styrofoam cup down. “Deep, deep down, he’s passionate about our family, loves them way more than he’ll ever admit.”
I leaned forward, elbows to knees. This was exactly where I’d wanted the conversation to go. Demetrius put on a front of nonchalance with his siblings, but I could see how much they meant to him.
“Is there a reason for that?” I asked, keeping my voice soft.
His grandmother hit me with a knowing smile that told me she understood exactly what I was doing.
“Because if he loves everyone as deeply as he loves you, they’ll use him as an example like they did his father,” she said. “And do it in front of his siblings, something he’d rather keep them sheltered from.”
The implication settled heavily in my chest. I knew his father was murdered in front of him; everyone did. But suddenly, the pieces clicked into place. His protectiveness, his careful control. That unwillingness to show vulnerability to anyone but me.
My mother had been the one to kill Gerald. She’d taken from him, and he still loved me like no one ever had before.
“Don’t,” his grandmother said, catching the shift in my expression. “Whatever you’re thinking, Demetrius wouldn’t want you carrying that weight.”
I blinked, surprised by how easily she’d read me.
“My mother—”
“Did what she was ordered to do,” she interrupted, her tone leaving no room for argument. “Just like you did what you were ordered to do before you found your way back to each other. This family understands duty, even when it cuts us to the bone.”
I nodded slowly, accepting her words even if the guilt wouldn’t completely disappear. He deserved the me who remembered everything.
“He hides how deeply he cares about all of you. I’ve noticed that.”
“When he believes in something, he believes it with his whole heart…” Her eyes didn’t leave mine.
“Loving you as deeply and openly as he clearly wants to is him giving you all the love he keeps bottled up for everyone else. He finds you worthy of that, and I find you worthy of the Cannon name because of it.”
Her words filled a space inside me I didn’t know was there. It meant more coming from her than it would have from anyone else.
Before I could say what was on my heart, the door opened. Demetrius stepped in, bags of food in hand, his eyes immediately finding his grandmother’s and then mine.
“Y’all good?” he asked, letting the door shut behind him. “Feels like you were just talking about me, G.”
His grandmother laughed, and it brought a smile to my face.
“Don’t worry about what we were talking about,” she chastised playfully. “And take your wife home. I’m fine here until Velma comes.”
She waved her hand dismissively, but Demetrius ignored the gesture. He handed me bags from the chicken joint up the block and took the seat next to mine, before taking them back.
“I hear you, but we’ll eat first…” he said, giving her a pointed look while handing me a container. “That cool with you?”
Instead of answering him directly, his grandmother looked at me and winked, a silent confirmation of everything she’d just told me. He cared deeply, even when he pretended otherwise.
Inside… our home, a couple of hours later, he headed for the bathroom without a word.
I stood in our bedroom, listening to him move around before turning the shower on. What his grandmother had shared was on my mind. But also how he’d witnessed his father’s murder. About how he protected his siblings by never showing them how deeply he felt for them.
Needing to wrap my arms around him, I stripped out of my clothes, leaving them in a trail toward the bathroom. The door was already slightly ajar, and I slipped inside the steam-filled space.
Through the glass shower door, he stood with his back to me, head tilted up as water cascaded down the planes of his dark skin.
I slid in behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist, pressing kisses down his spine before resting my head in the groove of it.
“Was wondering when you’d join me,” he murmured, his voice vibrating through his back and into my body.
He turned in my arms and backed me against the shower wall. The cool surface made me gasp, but it wasn’t hard to fall in line as he gripped my waist to hold me in place.
“You want something from me, my forever?” he asked, staring down at me intensely.
It wasn’t desire looking back, though it always lived at the edges of his expression. It was something deeper, more vulnerable.
I reached up and traced the outline of his lips with my fingertip.
“Are you upset about your grandmother?” I asked softly, hoping it would make him want to open up.
He shook his head, water droplets flying from his head.
“Nah.”
But his eyes told a different story. They always did with me. It felt like I could read Demetrius better than anyone, and right now, those dark eyes were filled with worry he was trying to hide.
I rose on my toes and pressed my lips to his, a gentle kiss meant to soften him up a little.
At first, he was unyielding to my attempt, but then I felt him begin to melt into me.
He relaxed as his arms tightened around my waist. Just as he started to deepen the kiss, I pulled back slightly and pushed my arms around his neck, bringing our foreheads together.
“I wish I could live in your mind,” I whispered, repeating the same words he’d said to me before I told him I loved him. “I want to know everything you’re feeling.”
A smile split across his face, and before I could stop it, mine too.
“I’m not upset,” he admitted. “But I don’t want her to die either. I’m thinking about sending her and my aunt to Philly or New York, where she can move about a little more freely…” He shook his head, immediately writing that idea off. “They won’t go for that.”
I kissed his lips again and then murmured against them, “You don’t have to hide how much you love your family, Demetrius. I won’t hurt or let anyone else hurt them. Tell me how you feel, please.”
He reached behind him and shut off the water. Then, without a word, he opened the shower door and guided me out. I let him wrap me in a towel and watched him do the same with himself. He regarded me with knowing eyes as he backed me into the bedroom.
“You and my G were talking about me, huh?” he asked, walking into the closet and returning shortly after with a bottle of vanilla body oil. “Was wondering when I’d get to address this.”
I took the oil from his hands and guided him to sit on the edge of the bed. His towel loosened as he sat, revealing a strip of dark skin along his thigh.
“Yes,” I admitted, kneeling in front of him. “She thinks you hide how you feel to protect them, and I think she’s right, but you don’t have to hide it from me.”
I poured oil into my palm and began massaging his feet, starting with the right. I worked the oil into his skin, feeling the tension in his muscles gradually release under my touch.
He had the nerve to have pretty feet. Why did everything about him have to be so perfect?
“Easier said than done, baby,” he told me gently, watching my hands move up to his ankles to his calves.
“Yes, I love my family. But I love you more. That’s why I openly show it, not because I’m giving you the love I hide from them, but because I love you so much it’s all I can fucking think about.
Not expressing that shit would drive me insane. ”
I listened intently, hearing the truth in his voice. The sincerity there was unmistakable.
My hands continued their journey up his legs, pushing the towel higher as I worked the oil into his skin. When I reached his thighs, the towel fell away completely, revealing his semi-hard dick.
My mouth watered at the sight, but I forced myself to stay cool for a little longer. This moment wasn’t just about us connecting physically; we’d done that over and over since recommitting. It was me truly seeing him, like he sees me.
“I love you,” I told him, looking up into his lust-filled eyes. “As long as my days continue to start and end with you, I’m content.”
He hummed deep in his throat and pulled me up from my knees and onto the bed, my towel falling away in the process. His solid body covered mine, that pretty ass dick pressing insistently against my thigh.
“Show me,” he whispered into my mouth.
And then he was inside me, filling me so completely that it stole the breath from my lungs. I wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him deeper as we moved together, finding that perfect rhythm that belonged only to us.
In that moment, I understood what part of his grandmother meant. When Demetrius Cannon loved, he loved with his entire being. And I only ever wanted to be loved that way.