Chapter 22
MORRIGAN
The cell door creaked open, leaving behind a quiet, scraping sound that I had grown far too accustomed to.
It was a sound I knew I would never forget. One that would be embedded in my mind any time I closed my eyes. It meant that Aamon was here.
“Wake up, little bird,” he whispered. “I’ve come for a snack.”
I didn’t bother trying to fight him. If I did, it would only be more painful. It usually ended with him hitting me and using his powers to render me speechless anyway. The last thing I wanted was for him to have a reason to push me any further than he already had.
“You know,” he said as he crawled over my body, pulling out the dagger from his side, “I’d be willing to strike a deal.” He lowered his nose to my shoulder, brushing it against my skin, and I could barely fight the nausea that rose in my throat. “A trade.”
It didn’t take long for me to decipher what he was insinuating. But it didn’t matter how badly he hurt me, I would never let him touch me. Neither of them. I would die before that happened.
“No,” I hissed at him, staring at the wall beside me while he traced the blade along my arm, forcing me to anticipate the cut.
He clicked his tongue in disappointment. “Such a stubborn girl. I’m convinced you like the pain.”
I sucked in a breath as it punctured my skin, rougher than usual. I quickly realized that he didn’t even bother compelling me. He knew I wasn’t going to scream anymore.
“If you didn’t, you wouldn’t make life so hard for yourself here.”
Suddenly, his tongue slid along the cut, making it burn even more as he tasted my blood, and I prayed for him to come to me… to bring my mind elsewhere… to let me slip into a dream where I was anywhere else but... here.
After letting out the most nauseating groan, he lifted his head and moved his lips to my ear. "You’ll give in, princess. You just need a little more breaking first.”
As I stared at Aamon in the cell, an infinite amount of emotions rushed through me all at once.
Hate. Disgust. Rage. Fear.
Why do I still fear him? I asked myself. Look at him… in his cage.
A spiteful smile teased on my lips, and Tristan grabbed my hand at the same time, opening the door to his cell as he led us inside. When Aamon noticed our presence, he looked up and froze when he saw me.
How did he get here? Did Cain kill him?
“We meet again, princess,” he said through a mouthful of blood.
“How long has he been down here?” I asked Tristan, unable to remove my eyes from Aamon.
Even though he sat chained on the floor, a small part of me expected him to stand up and charge me. Would his powers still work here?
“Not very long. I sensed his arrival a few days ago and sent Malakai out to track him down. He was immediately brought here.”
Aamon smiled then, the sticky crimson peeling away from his teeth as he licked them.
“And you kept this from me?” It came out more bitter than I had planned for it to. But Aamon brought out that side of me. Just looking at his face made my skin crawl, and I wanted to scratch away every part that he had touched.
“I needed to make sure you were able to occlude before bringing you down here. Power doesn’t leave when the body dies; it’s stitched into your soul. The last thing I would do is bring you to the very same man who not only used your body, but your mind as well, without a way to defend yourself.”
He’s right.
I stepped closer, kneeling beside Aamon as I ran a hand over the chains. “Who killed you?” I asked him.
His smile faltered at that, turning into a sneer before pulling back and spitting in my face. I assumed he thought the blood would make me gag, but he clearly underestimated all of the shit he and Cain had put me through.
Tristain took a menacing step forward, and I lifted a hand to stop him, casually lifting the hem of my shirt to clean off the mess. Then, a laugh slipped past my lips. I didn’t intend for it to happen, but then I couldn’t stop.
“What’s so funny, little bird?” Aamon sneered. “You’re stuck here just as I am. Trapped once more. Only this time,” he rolled his head to look up at Tristan and smiled, “you seem to have a new owner.”
Just as I felt the rage steaming off of Tristan, I stood and placed a hand on his arm, holding him back. “Oh, Aamon,” I said in a satisfied exhale.
I pulled Tristan along, walking out of the cell side by side, and closed the door myself. I had to give him a final glance to assure myself that this was real. He was here.
“I’d return the bird name to you, seeing as you’re now the one in a cage, but that title just feels far too pretty for the likes of you.” I stood there for a moment, tapping my fingers against the iron as I pretended to think long and hard. “Mouse… rat… insect?”
An audible snark came from deep within Aamon’s throat, and he tugged at the chains that bound him to the stone wall.
“Hmm…” I mused. “Nope. You’re nothing now, Aamon.”
“Whatever you want me to do with him, I will,” Tristan assured me, not bothering to lower his voice. “I can have Malakai rip him to shreds. His soul will be gone. He will be gone.”
Gone… Is that what I wanted? It would certainly be easier… quicker. But the thought of that brought no satisfaction to me. “No,” I decided before turning on my heel and walking away from his cell. “We have some unfinished business.”
“C-C-Cup,” Azrael read, sitting in the chair beside me with a piece of paper in his hands that I had written a couple of words on for him.
“Very good!” I exclaimed, rubbing his hair and watching his cheeks turn cherry red. “Next line.”
Whenever we had free time, I tried to have Azrael sit down and practice reading basic words. Just something to start him off with until we had access to more suitable tutors back at home. If we went home. I’d have to, eventually, if Dez and the rest of them can’t feed.
But I had time. Tristan assured me that, at most, only days would have passed for them. So that brought some reassurance for me.
“C-C-Cat.”
He continued moving through the three-letter “C” words as my mother entered the study.
Tristan didn’t have a large library like Cass or Dez, but he had a big enough study that he allowed us to take over whenever we needed to.
It was filled with lots of books that I had never seen before.
Some were other diaries written by Rosina.
I planned to read a few of them when I had the time to.
I craved to know her story—all of the parts Tristan hadn’t told me. And I wanted to hear it in her voice.
“He’s doing very well with the little time he’s had to practice,” my mother praised.
Azrael smiled up at her and read the final line before turning to me. “Can I get the cookies now?” he asked, giddy with anticipation.
“If all you eat is cookies, you’re going to turn into one. You know that right?” I teased him, which earned a laugh from my mother across from me. When he didn’t budge, I rolled my eyes, and nodded at the door. “Go on… but we aren’t finished. I want you to practice one more time before bed.”
He wasted no time excusing himself and ran for the door. I couldn’t help but smile as I thought of myself at his age.
“I used to tell you that all the time,” my mother chimed in. “He reminds me a lot of you as a child. So much energy… so much strength…”
So much pain, I thought to myself.
“Flower.” I turned toward my mother and saw the slight worry in her eyes. “I was made aware of the… visitor downstairs.”
Nerves crept up my arms, making the hairs stand on edge. “Are you going to ask me to leave him be? To forget what he’s done to me?”
She looked a little taken aback by the defensiveness in my tone, but quickly schooled her face.
“You are not a child anymore, Morrigan. Nor do I have any plans to tell you what to do. I lost that right a long time ago.” She straightened her back and pulled my hands into hers.
“I just want you to think about it… really think. I don’t need to know what your plans are, but I need you to ask yourself if you think it will fix anything.
And, is it something that you’re willing to lose yourself to? ”
Her voice softened and her grip tightened.
“I know what happened to Maeryn, and I know the turmoil it put you through.”
“I don’t regret it,” I said flatly, needing that to be known. “It hurt, and it took a while for me to fully comprehend what I had even done, but I would do it again.”
“It changed you. That’s only natural. I just need you to know that this…
might change you, too. And before you decide, I need you to be comfortable with that fact.
Comfortable with how you will look at yourself in the mirror afterward.
And comfortable with the person you will be when you sit next to Azrael at the end of it all. ”
Something about the last sentence lit a tiny flame of anger in me, and the words slipped out before I could stop them.
“Were you comfortable as you held me after Maeryn whipped me for the first time?” The pain that flashed in her eyes tugged on my heart, and I wanted to take it back. “Shit! No. I didn’t mean—"
“No, Morrigan,” she interrupted me. A single tear fell down her cheek, and landed on both of our hands. “In truth, I wish that I had been the one to kill her.”