Chapter 9 #2
“I’m worried about you, Brother Cassiopeia. Your aura shows signs of spiritual interference. Blockages that are preventing you from achieving your full potential.”
“I’ve been trying—”
“I know you have.” Brother Matthias reached across the table to cover Cass’s hand with his own.
“That’s why I’ve decided to provide additional assistance, just for you.
I normally wouldn’t do this, your mission is meant to be your own, so it is best kept between us.
Tomorrow morning, I’ll help clear those blockages through a release session. ”
Cass’s hand moved unconsciously to his chest, where those perfect circular scars lay hidden beneath his robes. “Tomorrow?”
“Ten o’clock. I’ll come to your room.” Brother Matthias smiled gently. “We’ll focus on the same points as last time, but I may need to address some new areas. The contamination seems more extensive than I initially thought.”
New areas. Cass’s stomach clenched—not the strange flip from before, but cold dread.
“That’s very generous,” he heard himself say. “I know growth requires discomfort.”
“Exactly.” Brother Matthias looked pleased. “Your dedication to Sister Honey is truly inspiring. We’ll get you exactly where you need to be, dear one.”
The embrace when they parted felt different. He was always scared when he received assistance with his energy blocks, it was hard not to be, but something about Brother Matthias felt…off. He hugged a little too long this time, and a little too tight. And he smelled different.
Growth requires discomfort, he reminded himself, pushing the negative thoughts away. This is how I become worthy of Honey.
But Riot’s voice kept echoing: There’s nothing wrong with your body. Nothing wrong with you.
He’s so kind. I should get him something.
The supplements were wearing off.
Cass felt it happening as he walked back toward the hotel—that familiar numbness fraying at the edges, his symptoms creeping back with interest. He was so lost in his body’s rebellion that he almost missed the moment his vision blurred.
The world tilted sideways, and he had to brace himself against a nearby wall, breathing hard as he crouched down in case he lost his balance.
Not now. Please not now.
“Hey there, are you alright?” The voice was warm, pleasant, with a hint of accent. Cass looked up to find a man in an expensive jacket crouching beside him, dark eyes full of concern.
“I’m...” Another wave of dizziness. “I think I might be coming down with something.”
“You look like you’re about to pass out.” The stranger steadied him with a gentle hand. “Here, let me help you.”
His scent was immediately soothing—expensive cologne with undertones of woodsmoke, like the first fire on a cold night. Not as distinctive as Riot’s strawberries and cream, but pleasant. Comforting.
“Thank you,” Cass said, letting the stranger guide him to a nearby bench. “I don’t usually get sick like this.”
“I’m Ken,” the man said, settling beside him. “Ken Nakamura. You look like someone who’s been pushing himself too hard.”
“Cass.” He felt a flutter of unease—should he give his real name?—but Ken seemed so genuinely kind, and Cass was too dizzy to think clearly. “It’s been a difficult week.”
“What brings you to this part of the Neutral Zone?” Ken asked. “It’s not exactly welcoming territory.”
“I’m working. Trying to help people.” Cass rubbed his temples, trying to focus through the returning symptoms. “It’s been harder than I expected. Everyone here is so suspicious.”
“They have reason to be,” Ken said sympathetically. “Are you here alone? That seems risky for someone in your condition.”
Something about the question made Cass hesitate.
“Not exactly alone,” he said carefully. “I have a friend. He’s been helping me.”
“That’s good. Friends are important.” Ken’s smile was warm. “Is he local?”
“He knows the area well. He’s been keeping me safe.”
“Safety is crucial around here.” Ken nodded. “Lots of dangerous people. You’re staying somewhere secure?”
The question felt reasonable, given Ken’s concern for Cass’s wellbeing, and his scent was so reassuring, making Cass feel like they were old friends having a casual conversation. Maybe there are more nice people here than I thought. It just took a while to find them.
“There’s a hotel nearby.” Cass gestured vaguely. “It’s not fancy, but my friend made sure it’s safe.”
“I’m glad you have someone looking out for you.” Ken patted his shoulder. “The Neutral Zone can be harsh on people going through difficult transitions.”
Something about the word made Cass look at him sharply, but Ken’s expression remained pleasant.
“I should get back,” Cass said, standing on unsteady legs. “My friend will worry.”
“Of course.” Ken helped him up. “But if you ever need someone to talk to—someone who understands feeling lost in a place like this—I’m often around. I’d be happy to check on you.”
“That’s very kind.”
“Take care of yourself, Cass.” Ken’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. “I’m sure we’ll see each other again soon.”
The hotel room was empty when Cass returned.
Right. Riot was at the pharmacy. Checking on his medication. Taking care of his responsibilities while Cass had been...
Giving information to a stranger. Telling him about the hotel. About Riot.
The realization hit belatedly, and Cass sank onto the bed with growing unease. Ken had seemed so nice. But the questions had been specific, hadn’t they? Pointed in ways that only seemed obvious now.
Everyone here is so suspicious, he’d said. Maybe they had reason to be.
Maybe Cass should have been suspicious too.
A whimper escaped him. He pressed his face into the pillow that smelled most strongly of Riot and felt his whole body ache.
Cass clutched his meditation beads and waited for Riot to come home, trying not to think about how the word “home” had started to mean wherever that strawberries-and-cream scent was strongest.
Transcendence means leaving behind patterns that no longer serve you, he reminded himself.
He didn’t want to leave this pattern behind. He liked it, even though it was scary, like standing at the edge of a cliff, terrified of falling, but part of him desperately wanting to jump.