Chapter 51
Chapter Fifty-One
A gasp ripples through the crowd, their accusing stares landing on my father in a mirror image of my own.
Dad only has eyes for me, but all I can do is shake my head. My mother died in the fire at Divine Mercy. Everyone knows that. Kane is wrong. There’s no possible way she’s been alive this entire time.
“Willa, please…” Dad rasps, eyes pleading and expression ghostly white as he takes the tiniest step toward me and extends his hand.
Dread drops into my stomach like a boulder. “Tell me he’s lying. Tell me you didn’t keep this from me.”
“ Willa ,” Dad says again, tone so thick it sticks to my skin.
The hairs on the back of my neck rise at the same time a shiver rakes down my spine. I stare at him, silently pleading for him to contradict Kane, but he doesn’t.
“Mom’s alive?” My voice is barely a whisper, but much like the broken jukebox at Rib Cage, the phrase is now stuck on repeat as it echoes inside my skull.
My mom’s alive.
My mom’s alive .
My. Mom’s. Alive.
The truth of that statement presses down on me so heavily my knees give out.
Before I can hit the grass, Ryker catches me by the elbow, maneuvering me away from Kane and tucking me against his side in one fluid motion.
“You’re okay,” he soothes against my ear. “I’ve got you. I’m right here.”
My legs are rendered immobile by the wall of flame dancing in my memory and the blood-curdling scream that fills my ears. There is something else there, too. A shadow shifting in the curtain of red and orange before everything turns black.
Kane’s chest rumbles with a low, almost pleased sound that only Ryker and I hear, and then he’s speaking again. “I told you why I came back to Deadwood,” he bellows beside us. “But how can I make this place a safe haven if our leadership cuts my legs out from under me every time I file for a permit? Just last night, the mayor and Officer Dunn were trying to put a stop to this open house because they didn’t want any of you up here. Mayor García can’t be allowed to install her puppets in positions of power?—”
Kane keeps droning on, but the second I regain feeling in my legs, I drown him out and shrug out from under Ryker’s arm.
Seeing red, I march straight up to my dad. “How dare you keep this from me!”
“Let’s talk about this at home, kiddo,” he says softly with a brief glance over his shoulder to the restless mob at his back. “I promise I’ll tell you whatever you want to know. Let’s just?—”
“No.” My vision blurs with hot, angry tears that I refuse to let fall. No part of me wants to have this conversation here with so many spectators, but the second we leave this field, Dad will find another excuse not to talk to me. “Tell me now or I swear you’ll never see me again.”
I’ve barely gotten the words out when Noah grabs me by the upper arm and drags me over to the shade near the cemetery with our father trailing behind us.
“Let go of me,” I squawk, struggling to free myself.
“Calm the hell down,” he grunts, batting away my hand as I attempt to pry his fingers loose, flooding my senses with his citrus and sage cologne—a smell that once felt like safety and now reeks of betrayal. “Come on, Willa. You’re making a scene. Just give us a chance to explain.”
Humid wind rips through the trees while an involuntary stillness takes hold of my body.
“ Us ?” I shriek. “ You knew ?”
Noah’s eyes widen, the rise and fall of his chest rapid enough that he might as well have just finished a sprint. “Not until I was older.” His lips slip into a frown, the set of his eyes softening until he almost looks like the brother I grew up with instead of the stranger he’s become these past few weeks. “It fucking killed me to keep this from you, but I didn’t know how to tell you.”
My heart throbs so painfully I glance down to see if there’s a knife sticking out of it. When there’s not, I resume attempting to escape Noah’s hold.
“Let me go, you fucking traitor,” I lash out, startling when Ryker appears out of nowhere and roughly slams his palm into my brother’s shoulder. He lets go of me as he stumbles backward, barely catching himself before he hits the dirt.
“Touch me again,” Noah pants through gritted teeth, “and I’ll knock you the fuck out.”
“Then have this conversation like a man and keep your fucking hands off your sister,” Ryker spits, snaking an arm around my waist to hold me back when I try to push past him.
“You knew and didn’t tell me?” I scream at Noah, balling my fists so tightly my nails bite into my flesh.
“Not at first,” he says, voice wavering as his eyes drop to the dirt.
Dad takes up a position at my brother’s side, his hands open and palms facing outward like I’m a spooked horse in need of soothing. “Kiddo, please. You used to wake up every night in the hospital screaming that your mom was going to come back for you. You were tearing open your wounds each time you had a nightmare. You were so young and in so much pain… I did the only thing I could think of and told you she was gone. The nightmares stopped and you finally started to heal. You have to understand, I was trying to make you feel safe.”
“Dad,” I say incredulously, “even if that’s true, I’m eighteen now. You’ve had plenty of time to come clean. And it wasn’t just me you lied to, it was the entire town!”
He hangs his head. “Annalee was so sick after the fire, I never even considered she’d survive. When people asked, it was easier to just lie and say she’d passed.”
“Why?” I shout, sounding a bit hysterical now. “Because no one asks about a dead woman? Because you thought no one would bring her up in the presence of the daughter she tried to kill? Well, they did, Dad. Each and every single time they saw me.”
Slack-jawed, I take a step backward, staring at the two men I once trusted most with new eyes. I’ve been living with strangers .
The shock of their betrayal reverberates through my bones, shaking the foundation of everything I thought I knew about my life.
“Is she still in jail? How long is her sentence?” Another question lodges in my throat, but I can’t find the strength to ask it aloud… Does she regret what she did?
Dad removes his Stetson, rotating the brim in a full circle before answering. “Twenty-five years. Ten years for what she did to you, fifteen for burning down Divine Mercy.”
I can’t decide if I want to laugh or scream. She got more time for destroying a church than she did for trying to kill me…
That’s fucking Texas for you.
Inwardly, rage courses through my veins so violently my muscles twitch with the force of it. Outwardly, all I can do is nod. It all makes so much sense now… Dad’s lack of eye contact, Noah asking if there wa s anything else Dad wanted to tell me after his promotion announcement… Mayor García’s confused expression when I mentioned that Dad had been traveling a lot for work on the Fourth of July.
I scoff, the sound thick and unamused. “So that’s what you’re doing when you say you’re going on a work trip to Austin? Visiting your murderous wife?”
Dad winces. “I divorced your mother years ago, when Lucy and I started to get serious. We’ve kept things private for the sake of her position.” His mouth pulls into a tight line. “As far as why I’ve been going to Austin, your mother’s been in and out of the hospital, and up until a few weeks ago, I still had medical power of attorney.”
Dad lets go of a long, exhaustion-drenched sigh. “It was a mistake not to tell you, but let’s go home and talk about this away from prying eyes.” Shoulders slumped but brows slanted optimistically upward, he extends a hand.
I glance at his open palm and laugh. “Ignorance isn’t a shield, Dad. All you did by keeping me in the dark was take away my autonomy and ability to fight back. I feel like I don’t know you anymore.” My eyes dart to Noah. “Either of you.”
With a frown, Dad drops his hand and slowly puts his Stetson back on. “Don’t blame your brother. This is on me.”
I press my lips together and shake my head. As far as I’m concerned, Noah is just as complicit as Dad, but at this point in our crumbling relationship, it’s not like it matters.
Rage burns through me so ferociously my senses go into overdrive.
The light breeze becomes a howling gale as the smell of the dirt beneath my boots and the sweaty bodies of the nearby crowd become so accosting I might be sick… My head swims, and then all at once, the chaotic drum of my pulse slows while my eyes heat and glaze over.
“I’m leaving for UT tomorrow,” I say with zero inflection, staring absently into the vacant space between my father and brother, not making eye contact with either of them. “I’d appreciate it if you both kept your distance until I leave.”
Dad says something, but I can’t even hear it. Like everything else, the words are empty.
Peering over my shoulder, I nod at Ryker, who’s kept a healthy distance but never strayed more than a few feet from my side. “I’m assuming you have to stay or go check on Charlie?”
“I do.” He slides his hands into his pockets, casting tentative glances between my father and Kane, who’s still droning on about the future to an enraptured crowd. He returns his gaze to me. “But I can at least give you a ride.”
I hold up a hand. “No. I want to walk and clear my head. Take as long as you need, but I’d like to see you before I leave in the morning.”
Ryker’s eyes stay locked on mine, his brow creasing as he dips his chin. “I need to wrap up a few things here and then I’ll be over.” The way his jaw works makes me think there’s more he wants to say, but I’m glad he keeps it to himself.
“Kiddo,” Dad pleads, but I ignore him, heading for the path buried in the trees.
“ Willa ,” he says more firmly. “You can’t leave. I’m your father and we’re going to talk about this whether you want to or not. Austin is too far. I can’t look out for you there.”
My steps slow as an unhinged laugh escapes my lips. Now he wants to talk ? I force myself to meet his eye.
“Look out for me? Dad, I haven’t seen you in months. I’m the one who’s been looking out for you and Noah for years .” Still laughing, I shake my head. “There’s nothing left for us to talk about. I’m eighteen, you can’t stop me from leaving.”
I take a single step before another voice slams into my back.
“Figures you’d walk away,” Noah calls out. “It’s not like Dad and I have set aside our entire lives to take care of you—to cater to your every whim and fear. God forbid you actually talk to us when we make a mistake, since you’re so fucking perfect. ”
I whirl around, strands of my hair lashing at my cheeks as the wind picks up. “You know what? I didn’t see it before, but you’ve been using what Mom did to me as an excuse for your lack of drive and laziness for so long I think you’ve convinced yourself I’m the reason you’re a fuckup. But you did that all on your own. If I never see you again, Noah Dunn, it’ll be too damn soon.”