Chapter 28 #4
My mind was blank when I arrived in my truck and aggressively started the engine. I barely looked behind me when I reversed. I knew I was beyond careless, but something in me told me that I needed to shit it and get it. To where, I was clueless. That’s until I was four cars behind August.
Basic Black’s “Special Kind of Fool” cruised through my speakers, making me increase the amplifier’s frequency.
When the beat dropped, I turned up the volume and rolled down the window.
I tapped the steering wheel, sang, and watched August Senior make a left turn.
He didn’t drive fast. He drove slowly as if he expected me to follow him.
I did, but two cars were in front of me.
When they got the fuck out of my way, I was on his ass.
Before I could comfortably read the tag’s plate, August lifted the truck more. The ass of the fine automobile rose, leaving me to know the front end had dropped. I grinned. “Oh, you are about to shit it and get it, huh? No problem. I got a little time on my hands to hawk you down.”
When the cost was clear for August to shit it and get it, he did, right onto an interstate ramp.
I sat upright and did the same. From downtown until we reached Oak Mountain Park’s exit, I was on August Senior’s ass, smiling, remembering the good times we had bobbing and weaving through the highway lanes just because it was a Thursday night. We didn’t want to be in the house.
It never dawned on me where he was leading me until I stopped focusing on myself and started trying to keep up with him.
After handing the smiling woman money and pointing in my direction, August swerved to the right before whipping the truck toward the exit lane.
My eyebrows furrowed as he stopped, and I moved closer to the teller.
“You don’t have to pay, ma’am. The gentleman before you have paid for you and the others behind you,” the cheery worker said as I never looked at her. My eyes were glued to the man staring at me as his window rolled down further.
“Okay.” I nodded, trying to catch more of my breath because I knew what August Senior was doing. He was making me face my thoughts that I shut off whenever they became too much for me.
Sliding up so that I wouldn’t have to holler to speak a few sentences to him, I didn’t know what to ask first or if I should ask anything. So, I studied his remorseful eyes. I wanted him near me as we visited our place.
“You know what you need to do. While you dined wit’ Thiago, I put a beach towel, spare clothes, winter swimmin’ stuff, another outfit, float, an’ the blower in yo’ hatch.
Do what’s best fo’ you an’ our kids, Mona.
Always do what’s best fo’ you first, then them.
You can’t fight yo’ thoughts fo’ever an’ expect to be a good mom.
Face what I did head-on. Get it out. Heal.
I couldn’t leave ‘til I saw you here. Mona, you need to focus on who be in yo’ company.
A motherfucka can love you from the outside, but can a motherfucka love you from the inside too?
I got you here. Nih, you gotta do yo’ part.
I’mma text you when I’m back. I’m gon’ this time nih.
I see you, an’ I feel you ready to accept what happened between the old me an’ you.
Get that mind healthy. I love you forever an’ always. See you later.”
He didn’t give me a chance to respond as Tony Toni Tone’s “Whatever You Want” blasted from his truck while he skirted off, rolling up the window.
Driving off, I didn’t notice my face was wet until I licked my lips. Turning onto a steep curve, Thiago called my phone. With a shaky hand, I answered. “Hello.”
“Where you at?” he asked as his background was filled with babbling, laughing kids.
“At my place of peace. No, I don’t want you near.
When I’m done spending quality time with myself, I’ll be over to retrieve Azaria.
I’m going to take a rain check on you staying over as well.
I need to face the music alone. If it becomes too much for me, I’ll call you.
Okay?” I said, pulling into the man-made beach parking area.
“When you saw August Senior?” he growled, which displeased me.
“I’ll talk to you later,” I told him quickly as I parked.
“Guh, answer me! When you saw August Senior?” Thiago bellowed, pissing me off.
Shutting off the engine, I knew what needed to be done.
With a racing heart and fingers curling onto the steering wheel, I spat, “Who the fuck are you talking to like that, Thiago? You better find yourself the nearest gotdamn mirror and check your feelings! For a motherfucka who is team me, you are surely worried about the wrong gotdamn person! You should be worried about me and my gotdamn mental health! Since I see you aren’t, we should murder how much we are in each other’s faces, and where your ass is every other gotdamn night until midnight!
In case that shit didn’t register with you, let me say it plainly!
This closeness between us is fucking over!
Get back onto the single train full throttle because Mona Abbott …
fuck, Mona Averhart isn’t up for the shit you are on! ”