The Eraser (Houlihan Men of Dublin Book 1)

Prologue

The kickto my stomach makes me heave.

”Do it,” my father warns, his voice thick and filled with hate. ”I”ll fucking make ya eat it, you little cunt.”

I swallow back the fear and vomit, praying I don”t throw up. The last time I did, he shoved my face in it and made me eat every last bit, and then I had to clean the floors. I was sick as a dog for ages after that.

”You had better be asleep when I get back home, you understand, boyo?”

I nod, not wanting to make a sound. Anything could set him off, and I don”t want him to hurt me again.

I lie on the floor, the coldness from the tiles seeping into my body. I hate this. I hate him. God, why does he always do this?

The sound of the front door slamming closed makes me flinch. It takes a while for me to get to my feet, my body protesting at every movement I make.

Once I”m in my room, I lift the hem of my shirt up and see the red marks he”s left on my stomach. The man”s clever, so damn clever. He always hits me where no one will be able to see the bruises.

”Stephen,” I hear Ma call, but I ignore her. She”s only going to ask me if I have any money. That”s the only reason she ever talks to me. The woman”s so focused on scoring drugs that she doesn”t care about her only child.

My bedroom door opens and slams against the wall at Ma”s heavy-handedness. Her eyes gaze over my body, and I quickly push my top down to cover up the bruises. ”You know better than to upset him. He works really hard, Stephen. You shouldn”t provoke him.”

I just stare at her. Isn”t she supposed to protect me? Isn”t she the one who’s meant to keep people from hurting me?

I think I was six when I realized that my parents were different from everyone else’s. Hell, I no longer go to school because my parents won”t take me. They”ll always have an excuse whenever the social workers come around. It”s funny that they believe I”m being homeschooled. How anyone could believe that a woman who”s addicted to drugs is capable of homeschooling a child is crazy. But it”s worked for her so far.

The first time my da hit me, I thought it was because I was bad, that I had done something wrong. It didn”t take long for me to realize that he just does it because he feels like it. He”s never shown remorse for what he does to me. He knocked me out when I was seven for playing in my room too loudly. I woke up to Ma crying that he”d killed me. Since that day, I have tried my best to stay out of both of their ways.

”I need you to go to the shop for me,” Ma says. ”I”m out of smokes and need some.”

I hold out my hand for her to give me some money, and she scoffs. ”Ain”t got no cash, Stephen. Do your ma a favor and get some for me.”

I shake my head. ”Da took all me money, Ma. I ain”t got any left.”

She releases a heavy sigh and walks out of the room, and then I hear her moving around the house. ”Your da”s a dick,” she hisses when she returns. ”Here,” she says, handing me some money. ”Go to the shop and get me some smokes. Buy yourself something while you”re there.”

She wants me to stay out of the house for a while. That”s something I”m more than capable of doing. Ma works the nightshift, and when she comes home, Da goes to work. They rarely see one another, and whenever they do, all they do is argue.

”I”ll be back later,” I tell her as I pull on my shoes.

”Don”t stay out too late, okay?” she says, and I nod as I reach for my jacket. ”Good. Behave while you”re out. The last thing I need is Mrs Barnes on my case about you again.”

”I”ll stay away from her,” I promise.

She grins at me, her eyes glassy and unfocused. ”Love you, baby boy,” she says, and I resist the urge to roll my eyes. She”s only nice when she”s high as a kite and ready to crash. Any other time, she”s always screaming and cursing at me.

I close the door behind me and set off walking. I glance at the money Ma”s given me, realize it”s only twenty euro, and inwardly groan. That”s not going to get me into town. Guess I”m staying close to home today. I walk toward the shops and get what Ma needs first. Usually, they wouldn”t sell cigarettes to a child, but Ma and Da know the owner, and they”re more than happy to sell to me as long as they”re paid.

I put the cigarettes into my pocket and the loose change into the other. I”ve got about five hours to kill before I need to be home. Ma sleeps like the dead and she needs the rest—according to Da—so I”m not to wake her. I don”t think Da knows that when he”s at work, I spend most of my time outside.

I wander the streets, walking up and down the rows of houses, looking around, seeing if there”s anything new, or anyone new, but it”s the same old, same old.

Hours later, I come across a big house that has loud noises coming from it. There”s giggling, and my feet move toward the sound. I move around the house and see a bounce house, and around six or seven smaller children playing. Everyone looks happy. Adults are sitting down talking, and there’s food spread across tables and drinks for everyone to have. It”s the most food I”ve ever seen.

My stomach starts to rumble at the sight, and I realize that I haven”t yet had anything to eat today.

”Hi,” a little girl with dark brown hair says as she steps close. ”Who are you?”

”Stephen. Who are you?”

The little girl steps closer. She has cool bluish-silver eyes. I”ve never seen anything so bright before.

I take a step back as she continues to watch me.

”I”m Callie. It”s my birthday. I”m five. How old are you?”

“I’m ten,” I tell her, knowing I look scrawny for my age.

“Want to play?” she asks as she smiles widely at me.

”Sure,” I say, lifting my shoulders and shrugging.

She takes my hand and pulls me over to the bounce house. ”I”m a twin,” she tells me. ”Maverick is my brother. He”s over there.” She points toward the small boy who”s running around with a toy gun. ”Let”s play and then we can get something to eat. I”m starving.”

I nod as I kick off my shoes. I should turn and leave, but there”s something about this little girl that”s drawing me in. It”s keeping me here. I follow her onto the bounce house and watch how she does it. Bend your knees and push up with your toes. I”ve never done this before. I”ve never been to a birthday party. I shouldn”t be here.

”Stephen,” Callie cries as I continue to stand here. ”You”ve got to jump too.”

I follow what she does and start to jump. It doesn”t take me long to get the hang of it, and soon I”m jumping higher than ever. Callie”s laughter is soft and unlike anything I”ve ever heard.

”Stephen, can you jump higher than me?” she asks.

I hear laughter and see her brother and his friends coming onto the bounce house. ”Of course he can. Boys are better than girls, Callie Wallie.”

”Stop calling me that,” she shouts. ”Stephen”s my friend. You”re not allowed to play with him.”

”Kids,” I hear a woman shout. ”Time to eat. Come on.”

I don”t have to decide what to do; Callie takes my hand and drags me toward the table of food. ”Mam, this is Stephen. He”s my best friend.”

I stare at the girl in shock. Best friend? I don”t know what that is.

”Okay, honey, it”s time to eat and we”ll cut the cake soon,” her ma tells her as she starts to load up plates of food and hand them around to the children. ”Stephen, is there anything you don”t like?” she asks.

I take a step back from the table. Is she giving me food?

”It”s okay. You can tell me.”

”I don”t know,” I whisper. I”ve never had any of the foods on display.

Her eyes sharpen for a second before she smiles widely at me. ”Take a seat with Callie and I”ll bring you both over a plate. Callie, honey, help Stephen to get himself a drink.”

When Callie”s ma comes over to us, she”s got two plates filled with loads of different foods, and I stare at them in shock. What are they? She bends down in front of me and holds out the plate.

”Why don”t you try a little of it all?” she says. ”Try not to eat too much if you”re not used to it. We don”t want you to get sick.”

I shake my head. ”I shouldn”t,” I say. If Ma and Da found out I was here and eating someone else”s food, they”d be so angry.

”It”s our little secret,” she says. ”You”re here to celebrate Callie”s birthday. She”s been so sad as her best friend, Ava, couldn”t be here. She has Chickenpox.”

I glance at Callie. ”I thought I was your best friend?”

She laughs. ”You can have two best friends. You”re my boy best friend and Ava”s my girl.”

I nod. That makes sense. I turn back to her ma. ”Are you sure, Mrs...”

”O”Hara.” She beams as she pushes the plate into my hands. ”But you can call me Nicola.”

I jerk back. ”Sorry, Mrs. O”Hara, but I”m not allowed.”

Her lips purse. ”I”ll tell you what, Stephen, while you”re here with us, you”re family, okay? So you can call me Nicola, okay?”

I nod. ”Okay, Nicola. Are you sure it”s okay to eat?”

Her eyes soften and tears fill them. ”Oh, sweet boy, yes, eat whatever you”d like.”

”Thank you.”

”Anytime,” she whispers, before she gets to her feet and walks away.

”Mammy likes you,” Callie says as she starts to eat. ”How come your mammy isn”t here?”

”My ma”s sleeping. She”s not nice like your ma.”

Callie frowns. ”Is your da nice?”

I shake my head as I reach for a sandwich. It tastes different, though not bad. Actually, it”s good.

”You can have my mammy and da. They”re the best.”

I smile at her. She”s cute and I like that she”s my friend. I”ve never had one before.

She continues to talk, and I listen as she tells me all about her family. She has aunties and uncles, a big family. I only have Ma and Da and they”re awful.

”Cake time,” Nicola calls out and everyone rushes over to the table. ”Maverick and Callie, make a wish as you blow out the candles.”

I watch as everyone starts to sing “Happy Birthday” to the two of them, then they blow out the candles and I see how happy Callie is. I”ve never seen someone look so excited.

My anger rises when I see Maverick reach for a slice of his cake and shove it in Callie”s face. I can”t control the rage that builds up inside of me as Callie starts to cry. I run toward Maverick and jump on him, making him fall to the ground, and then I start to hit him.

”Woah,” I hear a deep voice say from behind me as someone wraps an arm around my stomach and lifts me. I can”t stop the cry of pain from escaping me. ”I know that he”s a little tyke, son, but you can”t go around hitting people.”

”Butch,” Nicola hisses. ”Put the boy down, now. You”ve hurt him.”

The man puts me back on my feet, keeping a hold of my shoulder. ”I didn”t,” he says. ”I only lifted him.”

I watch as Nicola bats Butch away while Callie”s da pulls Maverick into his arms. ”Stephen, did Butch hurt you?”

I don”t answer her. I know that I did wrong and I”m in so much trouble. My parents are going to kill me.

”Honey,” she says softly. ”Look at me. Are you hurt?”

I glance down at the ground. I don”t want to tell her.

”Can I lift your top?” she asks, and I nod. I feel her soft hands pulling at the bottom of my t-shirt, and I know the moment she sees the bruises because she gasps.

”I didn”t do that,” the man she called Butch says. ”Christ, Nic, I didn”t do that.”

”Of course you didn”t,” she says. ”Are you in a lot of pain, Stephen?”

I shake my head. This isn’t the worst I”ve felt.

”Okay. Now, I know that someone”s hurt you, but we don”t hurt people. It”s not right.”

”I”m sorry. He made Callie cry, and I was angry.”

Butch turns me around to face him. ”That”s understandable, son. Sometimes things happen that make us angry. It makes us want to lash out. But we don”t hit people, okay?”

I nod. ”I”m sorry.”

He shakes his head. ”Not me who you need to apologize to, bud.”

I glance over at Maverick, who”s watching me. ”I”m sorry, Maverick.”

”He deserved it,” Callie says as she comes to stand beside me. ”He ruined my hair.”

”Oh, honey,” Nicola says softly. ”It”ll wash out, and yes, your brother will be told off for doing that, but violence is never the answer.”

”I”m sorry,” I say once again.

”It”s all over now,” Callie”s da says. ”We all make mistakes. It”s a learning curve.” He grins at me. ”I”m Eric, and I hear you”re Stephen, Callie”s best friend.”

My chest puffs at his words. ”Yes, sir.”

”No need to call me sir, Stephen. Eric is fine. Now, why don”t you all sit down and eat cake, then you can play once you”re done. How does that sound?”

”Come on, Stephen,” Callie says as she takes my hand. ”Maverick, if you promise to behave you can come with us too.”

Maverick shrugs and follows behind us.

I”ve never felt wanted before, but being around Callie and her family, it feels different. I have a feeling that this is how a family is supposed to be. Not the painful way my family is.

I don”t know if I”ll see Callie again after today, but I do know she”s changed the way I see things. I thought I”d always be treated with anger and pain. But today, I haven”t been, not by her family. That”s something I”ll always remember.