Chapter 10
Six months later
”You stupid bitch,”Dad sneers as the back of his hand connects with my lip. My face jerks against the blow as my body sways, but I don”t go down. No, that”ll only make him angrier. I’ve had almost four years of learning just what makes him angrier. When he’s in a mood like this, the best thing to do is ignore him. Unfortunately, that’s not going to happen now.
”Dad...” I murmur. He”s losing his mind. We”re in a room full of people. He”s always kept up appearances, showing the world his portrayal of a gentleman, not the crazy, abusing asshole who hurts his only daughter.
We”re at home but we”re having a party to honor my mam. It would have been her birthday today, and every man and their wife are in attendance. He”s mad because I’m wearing a dress that he said made me look like a whore, but it was too late to change. People had already started to arrive. The slap I received was because I laughed at something one of his men said.
”Don”t,” he hisses as he straightens the lapels of his expensive black suit. The crisp white shirt he’s wearing is new, right off the shelf. My father would never wear a shirt twice. No, he”ll always buy a new one. He thinks it shows wealth. I, on the other hand, believe that it shows what a pompous ass he is.
”You”ll pay for this, Jessica. I swear to fuck, you”ll pay for this.” He wags his finger in my face. His eyes are narrowed and his face is flush. He’s angry, and no doubt pissed that he let his mask slip in front of everyone.
I resist the urge to roll my eyes, knowing all it”ll lead to is more anger. The man needs to make up some new threats because I”ve heard them all. I’m so damn fed up with it all. I’ve got just a few more days. Just a few, and I can get the hell out of here.
I’ve had this plan in the works for years, but that night six months ago pushed me into gear further. I have to leave. I just need a few more days. That’s all I need.
”Thomas...” Jerry calls out, and Dad tenses. The boss isn”t happy.
Tut-tut. Not a good move, Daddy dearest. Pissing off the boss is a sure fire way to get yourself killed. I hide my smile. That’ll only make things worse, and right now, I’m not looking to make him lose his mind even more.
Dad glares at me before pasting on a smile and grabbing my hand, pulling me with him as he moves toward Jer. The grip he has on me is tight. I’ve been down this road before. The only thing I can do is grit my teeth and pretend everything is fine. I won’t let anyone know that he’s hurting me. But Jerry misses nothing. His eyes narrow in on Dad”s grip on my hand. It takes Dad a nano-second of seeing Jer’s narrowed eyes for him to release my hand and grip my shoulder, steering me toward Jerry.
It”s why Jerry”s the head of the Houlihan Gang. He hopes he can run the entire island of Ireland. It won”t be much longer until he tries to take control from the O’Leary’s. He has the full backing of the Gallagher family as his son is Malcolm Gallagher.
Jerry”s business, much like the Gallagher”s, spans far and wide. Jerry runs a lot of his business from Spain with his son Mal. When he returns home, here to Ireland, everyone knows that shit”s going down. The last time he was home, fifteen people died. Only one was a member of the Houlihan Gang, and word on the street is that it was a hit by Jerry himself. Apparently, the soldier was a traitor.
Jerry inspires loyalty from his men. My father was his right-hand man, his second in command. Everything went through him. Dad used to hang around Jerry and his friends, hoping that one day he’d be in a position of power. He certainly got his wish. But Jerry has no clue as to what Dad does to me. If he did... well, I”m pretty sure Uncle Jerry would lose his mind. But Dad has done something to piss Jer off. It’s why Maverick has taken over as his second in command.
It’s been four years since Mam died, and in those years I’ve seen my family a handful of times. They all promised me when Mam died that they”d protect me, that nothing bad would ever happen to me. But oh, how wrong they truly were. No one would have thought that the pain and suffering I”d endure would be at the hands of my father.
”Thomas,” Jerry growls quietly so only Dad and I can hear him. ”You ever lay a finger on her again, and we”re going to have problems.”
Dad”s grip on my shoulder tightens, but I manage to stop myself from wincing in pain. I stay still, not making a move and not showing any emotion in my eyes. It”ll only make things worse for me.
”Jerry, we”ve been friends a long time. But what happens under my roof is my business.”
Jerry”s jaw clenches. The flash of anger in his deep brown eyes has Dad”s hand on my shoulder shaking. No matter how much of an asshole Dad is to me, he”s scared shitless of Jerry. It”s the way of bullies. They pick on people they deem weaker than them, but there will always be someone bigger and stronger who will come along. ”She”s my niece, Thomas. My fucking niece.”
To anyone watching, and there”s plenty who are, it looks like a loving family moment. Dad has his hand on my shoulder as I stand obediently beside him, and Jerry looks at us both with a smile on his face. It”s a facade. One we’ve all perfected over the years.
”Jessie, love, why don”t you go put some ice on that lip of yours. Hmm? Try and get to it before the swelling comes out,” Jerry tells me, and I know it”s his way of telling me he wants to speak to my Dad alone.
Suits me.
”Of course. If you”d excuse me,” I mutter as I paste a bright smile on my face, one that I perfected years ago. It was something Mam taught me. In this world, you need to have the fake smile, the right words, and the correct way to behave. It”s survival of the fittest, and one wrong mistake can get you dead.
”Jess.” The hushed hiss from Mallory has me genuinely smiling as she follows me into the bathroom. ”My god, what a monster,” she growls when she sees my lip, and I notice that she”s got ice in her hand for me. She grabs a clean towel from the cabinet and wraps the ice inside it with practiced ease. ”I”m so angry!” she snarls, her lips curled up at the ends.
She had my beautiful nephew three months ago and he’s an absolute angel. I dote on him daily. He’s my source of happiness these days. ”Mal, you know what he”s like. This is normal for him.”
She scoffs. ”Normal my ass. Christ, Jess, he slapped you in front of a room full of people. He”s gone off the deep end. There”s no way you can deny it. You should tell your uncle.”
I”m shaking my head before she even finishes talking. ”Who”s that going to help? Certainly not me. My dad finds out that I snitched, then what? There”s no way he”s going to let me get away with it.” I press the towel to my lip and hold it still. Thankfully, it won”t be too bad. It could have been a hell of a lot worse. It may bruise, but not badly.
I know that as soon as this party is finished, he”s going to come for me. The punishment will be harsh, and yet again, it”ll be for something he believes I”ve done.
Her hand shakes as she brushes it through her hair. It”s what she does when she”s nervous. ”How many more times, Jess? How many more times can you survive what he does to you?”
I swallow back the fear. It”s something I ask myself every single day. There”s nothing I can do. You can”t run from this life. You”d be dead before you even hit the airport or the port. Dad would probably love it if I ran. It would finally give him the reason to do what he”s always wanted to do. Kill me. But I have to. There’s no way I can stay here. Mallory and I have a plan.
”I”ll be fine.” It”s a lie. We both know it.
”Bullshit. Have you seen your back?” Tears well in her eyes, and I pray that she doesn”t let them fall. Her eyes are heavily lined in eyeliner, not to mention the dozens of coats of mascara she puts on. If she cries, it won”t be a pretty look.
”Of course I”ve seen my back.” God, I can”t wear anything that shows my back. The kiss of the flame has left its mark. She”s seen my back. There was no way I could have hidden it from her. But she”s not seen my thighs. God, that was painful. Even more so than my back. The rough scars are there to serve a purpose. They”re to remind me of everything my dad”s tried to teach me.
Do not betray the gang.
I haven”t. Never have and never will. But Dad seems to have made up his mind. He thinks I betrayed him by meeting Stephen. He thinks I betrayed him when I was late coming home from school because I was in detention and missed the bus. He never listens. He always believes whatever the fuck he wants.
I learned a long time ago that nothing I do will ever change the way he feels about me. He”s hated me since the moment my mam died. Hell, it was even before that.
I”ve lived a life without love and support.
In our world, those things don”t exist.
There”s no Prince Charming to rescue me from an ivory tower.
There”s no loving family that will move Heaven and Earth to make sure you”re safe.
No. In this world, you get the evilest of men.
The men who rape, maim, and kill.
Mam was dead two weeks when I first heard my dad rape someone. Her screams gave me nightmares for months.
I was fifteen when I saw him take a man”s tongue for speaking to the gardaí, a lesson learned that you do not speak out against the Houlihan Gang.
I was sixteen when I watched him put a bullet in a man”s head for telling my dad that he wouldn”t pay his debts. Another lesson learned. Don”t borrow money from anyone. I stood there with blood and brain matter all over me and not once did I flinch.
Some days, I wonder if I was made for this world, but then I remember the things I”ve witnessed, the things I”ve endured, and I realize that yes, I do belong here. I was born from the blood of my father and the love of my mother. Together they made me. I should have been a boy, my dad tells me regularly, so I would be someone he could be proud of. But I”m a girl, and we don”t have any value to men unless we lie on our backs and take what they give us, whether we want it or not. We”re to bear their children and not speak out of turn. I belong for one reason only. To be someone”s woman.
The only problem is, I don”t want to belong. I don”t want to be that woman who’s beaten down. I want this world to crumble at my feet, and for everyone who”s harmed me to feel the pain they”ve made me feel. But it”s a pipe dream. There”s no way that could ever happen. But the thoughts are what keep me going. They help me through the worst times.
”Come on, let”s go back to the party. The last thing we need is your dad coming to look for you,” Mallory tells me as she links her arm through mine.
I discard the towel in the sink and exit the bathroom. Together, Mallory and I walk back to the huge open dining room where the party is.
As soon as I enter the room, the air around me changes. It”s static, menacing, and evil. It takes my breath away, but not because I”m afraid. No, I find the feeling intoxicating. It feels like something addictive.
Raising my eyes from Mallory, I gaze around the room. My heart stutters when my eyes land on him.
He”s here.
The devil himself.
Stephen Maguire.
His eyes narrow as he takes me in. It”s as though he”s drinking in every single thing about me, those whiskey-coloured eyes of his seeing too much. The edge of his lips twitch when I don”t turn away.
I was always taught not to show fear. I”ll be damned if I show the man that he scares me. It’s been six months since I’ve seen him. I can’t let him get close to me again.
He gives me a slight nod, and I see the darkness and lust swirling in his eyes.
I”m speechless. He’s making it known that he wants me. This is new. My breath shallows and heat pools between my legs as I stare at the epitome of evil.
He winks at me.
I know what that means.
Game on.
Fuck, I’m not ready for this.