Chapter 33 Galling Guidance
A Bumped-Up Betrothal
Tam swept his hand through his wet hair in an attempt to keep his black locks out of his eyes.
His hair was now long enough that he needed to tie half of it back.
It was just before the dining hour, and he had been returned to his human self.
Though he had insisted on a bath afterward to chase away the odd prickling sensation in his skin from the experience.
He reached for the clean tunic he had set out atop the battered pine dresser and tugged on the garment gratefully.
A cool breeze sailed through the small open window to his and Eli’s room.
As he tucked his tunic into the top of his pants, Tam heard the bedroom door opening and closing.
He looked over his shoulder, though he already knew who it would be.
Eli casually stepped into the room, her right hand coming up to cradle her lower back. She watched Tam with a cool mask of observation in place.
Her hand placement drew Tam’s eyes downward. He paused. Blinked. Then slowly straightened.
“You already have a bump. When did that happen? That seems early.”
Eli’s calm demeanor dissipated as her cheeks flared a delicate pink.
“I’m just bloated! It happens! Besides, the physician said around three months it wasn’t uncommon to show a little, and it really isn’t that noticeable.
These pants were tight to begin with, and I’m not moving around much, and you keep feeding me.
Most people wouldn’t think anything about it, I just—”
Tam smiled and took two quick steps to wrap his arms around Eli, quieting her string of defenses. “I’m just surprised. And if I’m being honest? Excited. I hadn’t noticed it this morning. I know it won’t be apparent to anyone else, but… well… obviously, we know differently.”
He was lying just a little.
The curve of her middle was actually quite telling.
The physician had said every woman experienced pregnancy differently.
According to what Tam was seeing, while Eli did not have many negative symptoms, evidently she did show early.
Tam silently appreciated Eli for remembering to confirm that they were not in fact expecting twins.
“It feels like this happened over the course of a day,” she mumbled into his shoulder.
Tam brought his focus back to the present. “How do you feel about it?”
Eli sighed. “Awkward.”
Tam chuckled. “Does it make you feel better to know I’ll be a chicken again tomorrow?”
She paused. “A little.”
Laughing again, Tam leaned away from Eli. He kept his arms locked around her as he peered down yet again at the evidence of their next child.
“So, feel like making an honest man out of me once we get back to Austice?”
Eli’s lips pressed together, but there was a playful twinkle in her eye that revealed she didn’t mind his teasing. “I don’t know… I’m not sure I’m ready to be tied down.”
“Are you planning on leaving me as soon as you have our third child?” Tam feigned a look of hurt.
She gave a pensive twist of her mouth. “I do still have to become a magistrate, and I’m told infants cry a lot.”
Tightening his hold, Tam whirled Eli over to the bed. He backed her into the footboard to force her to lie down so he might climb atop her, making her laugh.
“If I have to, I’ll hire three wet nurses so you can study without issue.” The tip of his nose was less than an inch from hers.
She sighed with a smile. “I guess that would help.”
“Is that a yes then? You’ll marry me?”
Eli wriggled beneath him, but Tam lowered his greater size over her until he felt the bump against his own stomach. It was hard not to let on how giddy that sensation made him.
She laughed a little more. “You’re too impatient, my lord.”
Tam emitted a faint growl, which ignited an entirely different kind of shine in Eli’s eyes.
However, after a quiet moment, she spoke.
“I… I’m not saying no… And I’m not saying yes,” she began slowly.
“You see, it will be more complicated to get married than you think. With my departure from the imperial family, I’ll have to file paperwork if I want to be a part of Lord Harris’s family.
That would take a while. Not to mention Daxaria will already be busy handling the fallout from the coven. So—”
Tam did not bother hiding his pleading expression. “A betrothal isn’t as complicated. I’m not asking you to marry me tomorrow—though I would—but can we say we are getting married?”
Eli didn’t answer straightaway as her eyes moved to the ceiling.
Seeing this, Tam’s eyebrows twitched. He slowly eased off her to sit on the edge of the bed. “Is there something that is bothering you, or that you’re worried about when it comes to us getting engaged?”
Eli joined him at the edge of the bed.
Tam braced his elbows on his knees and loosely clasped his hands while he waited for an answer.
She fidgeted, and her previously happy expression dwindled.
Tam’s gut twisted unpleasantly.
“I’ve just seen things go wrong. I’ve seen the best of people and places change and trap a person. I’m scared that something will happen and that I will once again be stuck and powerless.”
As much as it pained him to admit, Tam had of course heard his own fair share of horrible stories where a once-loving partner changed into something awful. Someone abusive, or complacent…
“I know that no matter who gets married, it’s a risk.
The sanest and best-tempered of people can become vile.
You can be a princess in allegedly one of the safest places in three kingdoms and still get kidnapped.
And in my experience, when you bet on a more influential person or place, you risk more going wrong.
Tam, you are a member of one of the most powerful families—arguably—in the world.
I can’t…” Eli trailed off and licked her lips before continuing.
“I can’t get trapped again. I don’t have the strength to survive it again.
As much as I believe you are a good person from a good family, I know how wrong this could go.
I’ve lived through great things falling apart, and I can’t do it again. ”
Tam felt an unpleasant mix of nausea for Eli’s past traumas and pain.
He understood what she was saying and why.
It didn’t make it easier to hear.
“Is there anything I can do that would make you feel more secure about moving forward?” Tam asked, his voice soft.
Eli gave him an apologetic smile. “I don’t know that there is. You’ve been perfect. I know I’m… I know I’m hurting you even though you joke about it a lot, and I’m sorry.”
Tam reached over and grasped Eli’s hands, which had fidgeted through the conversation. “Thank you for talking to me about it. If there is something I can do to help you feel more comfortable, please let me know.”
Tears rose up in Eli’s dark eyes and shone in the pale light.
“You’ve already done everything possible.
You don’t throw that we’re having a baby in my face.
You don’t point out how the baby would be looked down on by some people.
You don’t try to tell me that our familiar bond means our souls are compatible…
I expected all of that, and you wouldn’t be wrong for saying it. ”
Tam leaned over to gently kiss the top of her head. “I don’t need to say it, because you’re smart. Obviously, you would have thought about those points, and you would’ve already figured out what you think about them.”
Eli sniffled.
Tam didn’t bother commenting on the fact that the uncharacteristic emotion was most likely due to pregnancy.
He’d made that mistake only once. He’d received the silent treatment for the better part of a day before he had plied Eli with jam cookies, her greatest craving as of late.
She hadn’t been wrong when she’d complained that he kept trying to feed her.
Feeding her seemed to make her happier. So Tam kept doing it, and he would keep doing it until the physician or Eli told him to knock it off.
“What kind of wedding would we have?” Eli’s question caught Tam off guard.
He grinned as his eyes drifted thoughtfully to the floor. “A small one. Obviously Luca and Penelope would be there, along with my parents, Lord Harris and his wife if you wanted, my nephews, Kraken, Pina… That sounds good to me.”
“What about Bong and Jeong?” Eli frowned. “And why didn’t you list your sister?”
“I wasn’t invited to her wedding. Seems fair.” Tam shrugged while giving Eli a boyish smile. As immature as the sentiment was, they knew he would invite Kat regardless of what he said.
“Don’t you have any other friends?” Eli prodded next.
Tam arched an eyebrow. “And here I mistakenly thought you would’ve wanted a quiet wedding.”
Eli snorted. “I don’t want to offend anyone. You are a future viscount and duke.”
“Oy. You know as well as I do that I probably won’t become a duke. Especially not with everything going on with the covens.”
“Oh, right.”
“Besides. If you recall, I had alienated myself rather efficiently before you came along.”
Eli tilted her head back and forth as she wordlessly acquiesced to his point.
Tam lowered his hand from Eli’s neck to rub soothing circles along her back.
The cottage was quiet aside from the sound of gulls crying in the distance outside. The cool breeze and warm sun made for a rather pleasant, sleepy atmosphere.
“A small but proper wedding… Is that even possible given I’m…” Eli looked down at her middle as she trailed off.
Tam raised his eyebrows and pressed his lips together. “Erm. What is a ‘proper’ wedding in your mind? Because I’ll be honest with you, the fact that my illegitimate son will be attending might thwart that objective.”
At this reminder, Eli’s stressed expression eased away, and she suddenly looked confident and bright. “You’re absolutely right. Why would we want a proper wedding if it meant Luca couldn’t attend?”
Tam grinned. “So… You’re saying we are betrothed, or you are just talking hypothetically?”
Eli’s expression flattened as she angled herself on the bed to face Tam’s profile directly. “Fine. You can call me your betrothed. But I don’t want a wedding date set.”
Tam’s face felt like it had been ignited with joy.
Seeing his reaction, Eli blushed. “Gods… Why your mother was ever worried about you remaining single, I’ll never know. Don’t worry, Tam. One day you’ll make a beautiful groom.”
He tossed his head back dramatically. “Thanks. I’ll grow my hair out for the occasion.”
At his silliness, Eli succumbed to another laugh. “Gods. I love you. You are clingier than I would’ve thought, but I love you.”
His smile changing to a smirk, Tam pressed a very loud kiss into Eli’s cheek. “And you’re stuck with me.”
“Not yet I’m not,” Eli muttered through her own smile.
Tam ignored this and instead focused on kissing Eli on the lips, to stop her from making any attempt to take back her agreement.
It was another small step for their relationship, but a giant one for Eli.
Despite the fact Tam was supposed to break into the sacred buildings on the Isle of Wittica the very next day, he couldn’t help but bask in the moment. It felt nothing short of divine.
Eli halted their kissing. “Oh, one thing about the wedding.”
Tam would’ve agreed to get married with his face painted like a beaver’s if it just meant he could keep kissing her.
“Harold the donkey is banned from the ceremony. He can join the reception.”
Tam managed to steal another kiss before responding. “But he’d make the prettiest flower mule in all the land.”
Eli tried to object between his advances and laughing, but didn’t quite succeed, and so they basked in the moment without allowing anything else to detract from it.