12. Aarti
AARTI
S weet girl, he said, and I loved it. From his mouth, in his voice, in that tone, it sounded neither infantilizing nor patronizing. Ringing with affection, it felt validating. It made me feel special.
I turned and looked at him standing at his door. When I waved, he waved back with a quick flash of his dimples.
He was an exceedingly striking man who made the word handsome sound pedestrian, but he was at ease with his looks.
His outward appearance was not what made him.
It was incidental to his overall life goals and achievements.
But he didn’t miss the admiration he got as he strode through the world with confidence and nonchalance.
I had first seen him when he was in Dallas for Tara’s exhibition at the art museum. Apparently, he had surprised her by claiming that he had a big meeting he couldn’t miss, but secretly made plans with her mother to fly in on the day. Sameer and I were there as patrons of the museum.
The look of love and happiness on Sujit’s face as he gazed at Tara had left me slightly envious. My eyes had drifted to Sameer in search of similar validation, but his eyes were on Tara as well. In retrospect, I was jealous that Tara had the undivided love of two beautiful, decent men.
Sujit was surrounded by beauty and glamor that evening, but his eyes never wavered from Tara. The pride on his face when she addressed the audience, his loyalty to her, might as well have been etched in stone, scribbled across the skies. It was unmistakable.
So even as I found myself drawn to this brilliant, kind man, I knew I’d only be second best. I could never have his heart like Tara did. It wasn’t that I was seriously considering the possibility, but whenever my mind tried to flirt with the idea, my brain shot it right down.
With a sigh, I stepped off the elevator.
Imran waited for me at the entrance, holding the door open for me with eyes averted in deference.
I thanked him and made small talk as he drove me to the hotel.
I considered myself savvy, but I couldn’t get him to spill anything about Sujit and Tara’s relationship.
Not that I was obviously prying. I had more finesse than that, but he was smart and loyal to a fault.
He made himself out to be “just his driver,” but I had seen the smiles and the grins that passed between him and Sujit.
Imran was not just a driver. He was a confidant.
And Sujit had earned his trust in some way.
I’d just stepped into my room when the phone buzzed in my hand. It was a video call from Mom.
“Hi Beta, kaisi ho?”
“I’m good. How are you?” Just a look at her radiant face and my heart flooded with warmth and calm.
“You look tired. Didn’t you sleep well?” she asked with a gentle frown.
I smiled. “I did, Ma.”
“Are you eating well? I hope you’re not eating too much junk. Try to eat healthy.”
“Yes, Ma, I’m eating healthy…ish.” I grinned.
“I knew there was an -ish at the end of that sentence.” She laughed. “How was your event last night?” she asked delicately.
“You mean, how was my date? Not good. He’s not my type.”
A look flashed across her face as if she wanted to say something, but she merely nodded.
“Say it, Ma. You know you can still tease me. I’m not so damaged that I can’t take a joke.”
“No, my darling. You’re not damaged. Just hurting. And it will pass. Let it pass. Don’t try to hold on to the hurt.”
I nodded.
“Okay, here’s what I was going to say. Is there any man who can live up to your standards?”
Well, there was one.
I quickly deflected. “How are things in Dallas?”
“Same old. The weather has been good. Looks like the winter won’t be as severe this year.”
“Ma, don’t use the word severe for Texas winter,” I chided lovingly.
She smiled. “Is it cold there?”
“Yes, but not severe yet. And that is the correct context of the word severe.”
She laughed heartily, giving me a full display of her teeth and open mouth. I loved watching her laugh like that. Dad peeked in.
“Hello, Puttar! Sab theek?”
“Yes, Papa, everything is fine. How are you? Hope you are not messing things up without me there.”
He waved his hand. “I miss you at the office. Your useless brother has a lot to learn,” he said with exasperation.
Mom hit his arm. “Don’t use such words for your child!” she chided him with a gasp.
“It’s the truth,” he tried to argue. “Have I ever used it for Aarti? No. Because she’s not.”
“Yes, yes, we all know she’s your pride, etc.,” Mom said. “Now leave. Let me talk to my daughter.”
He smiled at me and waved goodbye.
Dad and I talked almost every day, but it was always a work call.
He called from his office and never once asked how I was.
We got straight to business and hung up as soon as we took care of it.
It worked for me just as well. I was cast in my dad’s image in many ways.
I had my personal time and space and my professional time and space, and I didn’t like for them to overlap.
Only now, I had transgressed the sanctity of that boundary by forming an emotional bond with a man who technically was a business relation.
But was he only a business relation? The unexpected thought rattled my composure.
“Did you get my email with the pictures, Beta?” Mom asked, and I was grateful for the distraction.
A distraction that wasn’t one because it led me right back to Sujit’s home, sitting beside him, soaking in his gentle scent.
“Yes, Ma. I…”
“Don’t worry. I disliked every one of them.
But I didn’t want to make that decision for you.
You take the time you need. I want you to find love, not an alliance, not an exchange.
I want you to thrive in love, my darling.
We were wrong to push you towards Sameer and we learned our lesson the hard way. ”
Mom was the only one before whom I could cry without inhibition. So, I did. I cried for the love I had lost and for the attraction that would never materialize into anything tangible. Mom cried with me.
“All right, that’s enough, my baby,” she said, finally wiping her tears.
You are too strong to let yourself wallow in pain.
When you come back, we’ll cry together. I can’t console you from afar.
I need to hold you when you’re upset. I need to wipe your tears.
Don’t cry now when I am far away and helpless. ”
I smiled through my tears. “Okay, Ma. I love you.”
“Now, let me tell you something juicy. That will take your mind off things.”
She spent the next twenty-two minutes sharing gossip about the people we knew while I tidied up my stuff.
We were very much a part of the desi rumor mill that Sujit and I had talked about.
Deeply entrenched in it, although Mom’s gossip was innocuous.
She wasn’t spiteful and firmly refused to participate in spreading malicious falsehoods, but she did enjoy gossiping.
She also updated me on the health and well-being of our extended family, venting about how women her age were always bitching about their daughters-in-law and how, like professional life, family responsibilities should come with a retirement age.
They needed to take a chill pill—yes, she used that term—and let the youngsters take charge of their own lives and families.
Her chatter did help take my mind off my woes as I got ready and headed out.
I stopped by the condo. It looked in good shape to move into on the weekend.
Later, I drove to three sites around the city to assess the condition of the properties and got estimates for the cost of repair and repainting.
One old building needed its electrical system redone.
I called Dad to discuss this, and he agreed with my assessment.
That would be a substantial cost that we had not accounted for in this quarter.
We would need to adjust some numbers, but we would proceed with the rewiring of the building before we leased it out for commercial use.
By early evening, I was happy, tired, and in need of good food. I texted Sujit to ask if we were still on for that evening. He called me back.
My spirits lifted as I envisioned the sweet smile on his stunning face. “Hey, how’s it going?”
“Good, how was your day?” he asked.
“Very satisfying, but I’m bone tired! Are we on for today? If not, I’m going to grab a quick something and crash in bed,” I said.
“Here’s a counterproposal. I’ll pick you up, we can have a nice, relaxed dinner, then you can crash in my guest room, and I can drop you back tomorrow.”
“What if I want to stay longer?” My stupid mouth ran itself before I could rein it in. I wondered if he’d regard my jest as presumptuous.
But his reply was instant and unhesitating. “Then bring a bag,” he said. “Fair warning, though, Saturday is game night, and it’s my turn to host. We’re playing Catan.”
“Oh, then I’ll make my escape before that.”
“Why? Don’t you enjoy board games?”
“I do, but I wouldn’t want to intrude on your nerding-out time, and I haven’t played Catan.”
“Really? Then you should join us. We are lovable nerds. Plus, you’re so beautiful, we might be too distracted and you can outplay us with ease.”
I fell silent. My beauty had been commented on for most of my adult life. I had heard variations of the word that could fill an entire thesaurus. Hearing him say it—simple and straightforward—hit differently. My pounding heart expanded with pride.
He had fallen quiet, too, perhaps thinking of ways to backtrack his words.
“Oh, so you’ve noticed I’m beautiful?” I asked to ease the tension.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it the way it sounded.”
“How did it sound?” I asked.
“Crass and replete with lechery. In absolute bad taste.”
I smiled at his honesty. Most men didn’t have the guts to acknowledge their errors in this way. Most men didn’t have egos magnanimous enough to offer an apology of this kind. Sujit wasn’t like most men, and he’d proved this over and over again.