Chapter Fourteen #3
The Demon stepped back, holding his hands up in surrender. “I’m going hunting.”
Talon raised his brows. “Now?”
“We lost everything and we still have a long trek to Nàdair.”
Talon scratched the back of his head. “Do you want company?”
Arianna suddenly felt out of place. She didn’t want to see these two interacting. She didn’t want to accept there could be a friendship there. It hurt too much.
“Sure,” The Demon answered.
Talon turned back to her. “They’re all inside, if you want to—”
“How do you know I won’t run?” she asked. Were they really just planning to leave her out here?
Talon’s face fell. “You’re not a prisoner, Arianna.
And Ellie is inside. I know you wouldn’t abandon her.
” Arianna flexed her fingers. So they were using Ellie against her.
With the adrenaline fading, the headache had returned, along with enough weariness that begged her to sleep for an entire week.
She felt like an old cloth being torn in multiple directions.
Any minute now, the seams would rip and tear apart the very foundations of her soul.
“I’ll go in soon.”
Talon nodded, then she watched her best friend disappear through the trees with her enemy at his side. Tears fell before she could stop them.
Slowly, bit by bit, she was losing everything.
Chapter Thirteen
Rion
“What did she say to you?” Talon asked after several minutes of silence.
Rion was secretly glad for Talon’s company, though he’d never admit it.
Talon carried a calming nature about him that reminded Rion of Arianna.
The two had grown up together, after all.
Hell, at one point Talon had loved her. Kissed her.
He clenched his fists. Sometimes, in the dead of night, he wondered what he might have done if the two had been …
more. The mere thought of another’s hands on her had his possessive instincts roaring.
That could be a reality if she never recovered her memories.
A reality he certainly wasn’t ready to face, and he’d make sure every male within a thousand-foot radius knew it.
“It’s fine,” Rion said after a few beats of silence.
He knelt, the restless magic within his body eagerly fanning out, cascading over the rocks beneath their feet like a wave from the ocean.
It rolled through sand, clay, and stone.
It dove beneath thick tree roots, then rose to the surface again, searching for creatures roaming through the forest.
The male beside him had no idea the kind of restraint he’d been keeping on his mind or magic.
Nor did he understand the toll it was taking on his body.
Before Arianna, he’d always let slivers of it flow freely, just to take the edge off.
It had been a piece of advice given from an old teacher when he’d been attempting to learn control in his youth.
But Arianna was terrified of it, and to make matters worse, she didn’t even understand why.
Coupled with her inability to recall their memories, Rion had been keeping his magic in check.
Of course his stress was only amplified by the haunting images that plagued him day and night.
His sleep and waking life were blending.
Saoirse was starting to notice. It wouldn’t take Talon much longer.
Rion had almost asked Zylah if she knew any runes that might help, but he’d refrained.
The half-breed was more than pulling her weight just by tending to both Arianna and Ellie from sunup to sundown.
He loathed not being in control, especially around Arianna.
When her magic had exploded, he’d blocked most of it, then he’d frozen in place, waiting for her to come to her senses.
He’d seen the look in her eyes. The way she’d radiated with her own power.
That look always did something to him. He was thankful for the reflexes he’d honed over the years.
Without them, he wouldn’t even be standing right now.
Whatever Vairik had done to her mind would lead to his destruction if he wasn’t careful.
Rion pressed his magic through the ground and snatched a few small creatures, trapping them in a cocoon of earth and rock.
Their frantic running and jumping along the walls told him they were most certainly rabbits, but he’d check just to be sure.
He didn’t want to accidentally harm any of the Guardians.
Rion vaguely wondered how they might ask the Guardians for assistance against their greatest enemy.
“You know, you don’t have to talk if you don’t want to,” Talon paused, as if struggling with his next words. “But you can.”
Rion stood, a slight smile on his face. “You sound like Ellie.”
Talon groaned. “Don’t tell her that. I’ll never hear the end of it.”
“I’ll be sure to mention it as soon as we’re back. Maybe she’ll come too just for your torment.”
A pause. “She listens to you.”
Rion’s jaw tightened. None of them could explain why Ellie had chosen to respond to him out of everyone. Arianna was her sister, and she’d grown up with Talon.
“I’m just glad she listens to one of us.” That first hour had terrified the lot of them.
“I have a theory,” Talon said, walking alongside him as they made their way through the thick trees. “I think it’s because of what you’ve both experienced. You were tormented by the same type of magic. Maybe the mind can recognize it.”
“That’s not comforting in the slightest.” Rion didn’t want to think about Ellie experiencing the same level of torture he’d endured. Those shadows still haunted him, and they were clearly haunting her.
He was still trying to accept the horrid fact that Vairik had manipulated his mind for nearly a century.
He’d had so many people in his head, each changing what he knew and perceived.
He knew he’d done horrible things, he’d accepted that about himself, but what else had Vairik done?
How many of the rumors weren’t rumors at all?
Had he crossed lines he never believed himself capable?
Rion’s stomach soured. He clenched his fists and stopped walking, then looked down to stare at his open palm.
How many people had he really killed? Had Vairik stolen his memories as well?
“What is it?” Talon asked from beside him.
“I’m not sure I even know who I am anymore.
” Was that how Arianna was feeling? “How—” His jaw flexed.
“How do I know any of the decisions I’ve made in the course of my life were even my own?
” How many times had he experienced unprovoked anger?
How many times had he acted on it without caring about the consequences?
How many times had he sat with the guilt, wondering why he’d done such a thing?
Neither male moved for a long while. A bird flew overhead, then landed on a branch before jumping away again. Such freedom.
“I used to think you were nothing more than a monster,” Talon started. “The things you did. The stories we heard.” He shook his head. “When Arianna nearly took my head off for saying you deserved to die, I thought that maybe she was experiencing some sort of psychosis. Nothing made sense anymore.”
“Nothing makes sense now.”
Talon gave a mirthless chuckle. “You’re right, but at least we have some explanations. We can work through the details after we win the war. Maybe Lady Eimear can give you some insight, too.”
“She’s not taking off her iron just for my sake.”
“I don’t need to be a seer to know she won’t keep that bracelet on forever. Nor to understand that she won’t sit by while everyone else fights. Even in Móirín, we still talk about her like a legend. She and Lillian are both quite the inspiration for the female younglings.”
Rion’s shoulders sagged. He didn’t want to think about his mother on a battlefield again. She’d fought enough.
“I wish she’d just sit this one out.” Rion refused to even consider a world where Lady Eimear wasn’t alive. His heart couldn’t bear it. Not after years upon years of wondering the exact same thing.
“I wish Arianna would do the same, but alas, we seem to have surrounded ourselves with stubborn females. If Ellie comes around before the fighting begins, you can bet she’ll be the first at Arianna’s side.”
“Ellie is not fighting.”
Talon smirked, but Rion could see the sadness he tried to hide beneath it. “I look forward to seeing you tell her that.”
Rion swallowed hard. “She’ll welcome death too quickly. I’m not letting her fight in a war when she’ll only try to get herself killed.”
Talon’s smirk vanished entirely. His jaw worked, but instead of replying, he turned away.
They walked in silence until Rion finally approached the first of three creatures he’d captured with his magic.
He wrapped the grains around the animal’s frantic body, feeling its heart racing as his cocoon melted away.
Just as he’d thought, a rabbit. Rion didn’t dwell on the creature long before ending its suffering.
He stuffed the limp body into his satchel and moved on to the next.
Talon, apparently, couldn’t bear silence long. “Do you think Arianna’s mind will ease once we get to Nàdair?”
Rion wasn’t sure why Talon asked when the answer was obvious. Maybe he just needed the conversation to keep himself from spiraling. Rion’s thoughts were certainly deep enough to drown in.
“Only after she has us all placed in iron. Alec will convince her Saoirse isn’t a threat, but I’m afraid she’ll demand he lock me in the dungeons.”
Talon grimaced. “You won’t let that happen though, right?”
“Of course not. Saoirse wouldn’t allow it, either.” Rion’s jaw clenched again. Stop thinking about your mother. Stop, stop, stop.