Chapter 26
Interlude
Sixteen hours earlier…
Meeting my brother at his locker, I fist bump Darrel as he walks past on his way to the quad; it’s our normal hangout during lunch on most days.
I haven’t seen Ryder since first period.
I’m glad I went over to his house this morning.
I should have done it sooner. I’m trying to be a better person, a better friend. More like Ryder.
Julien stops beside me and enters the combination to the lock for his locker. “Just ran into Brea a few minutes ago. Apparently, Ry’s dad hasn’t told Faith or the girls that Ry’s with Liz and Fallon in Spain.”
“Did you tell Brea anything?”
“No, man. Not going to be the messenger that puts myself in the line of fire of Ryder’s mom.”
If I’d been the one who Fallon had called—yeah, like that would ever happen—I probably would have been on the next plane out of here as well, consequences be damned. So, I really can’t blame Ry for doing exactly what I would have done if the situation was reversed
It also doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together. I basically knew the answer when Julien showed me the text from Ry.
“Liz and Ry are back together, aren’t they?”
Julien holds his locker door open and turns to stare at me. I look away from the solace in his eyes.
I had been afraid to ask Jules his opinion, needing to live in denial a little longer. Eventually, I’ll have to man up and keep the promise I made Ry this morning about not interfering if Liz chooses him.
Liz had her memories return, and she came back to me.
For a few glorious hours, I had my girl back.
But I can no longer exist in that fantasy.
I have to face cold, hard facts and find a way for us to go back to being just friends.
One thing I do know, I’ll never be able to walk away from her.
I need Liz in my life like I need air to breathe.
This entire situation is FUBAR’d to the nth degree.
Over the past two weeks since Liz left, I have questioned my sanity.
To outsiders, our melodrama must appear absurd.
Me and Ry loving and fighting over the same girl.
A girl we grew up with and are best friends with.
Julien loves her too. Always has since we were six years old.
But, like Ry, he loved her enough to let her go when she and I started dating.
And now freaking Fallon is added to the mix.
You just don’t whisk someone off in a private jet to travel around the world.
I always knew he was infatuated with Liz.
How is any of this normal? How can one girl make four guys lose their minds?
What makes Liz so special that we are all willing to put her on the highest pedestal and worship the ground she walks on?
It’s ridiculous—but it’s not. Because how could we not fall in love with her?
She’s not only gorgeous on the outside with a smile that will light up your darkest day, but she is also smart, insanely talented, witty, loyal, and she has a heart bigger than the expanse of the universe.
We always called her our princess for a reason.
So yeah, what the four of us have together may be unusual, but it’s ours.
“There’s something I’ve been meaning to talk with you about,” I tell him as he closes his locker and reengages the lock
“Jay, you know you can tell me anything.”
Being twins means that we’re closer than most siblings, but there have been a lot of times that I haven’t felt comfortable talking with him about me and Liz
“How do I give her up? How do Liz and I go back to being just friends?”
Jules grabs my arm and takes a detour down another hallway, pulling me along with him. We walk out the side exit that leads to the faculty parking lot.
“Do you want my honest opinion, or do you want me to just blow truisms up your butt?”
Kicking a pebble on the sidewalk, I reply, “I need honesty right now.”
He slides his backpack to his front and unzips it, reaching in to take out a bagged sandwich and some chips. He passes me the chips and sits down on the concrete curb of the parking lot. I take a seat beside him and pull open the bag, eating a few of the barbeque-flavored chips.
“I have a feeling this talk may take up all of our lunch period,” he says, biting into his sandwich. “First question: Do you still love Liz?”
“Yes,” I say without hesitation.
“That needs a little bit more elaboration,” he says.
“Fine. Yes, I still love Liz. In a way, I feel like there hasn’t been a time that I haven’t loved her—you know?
But everything is just so messed up between us now.
We had that big fight the night I found you and Elijah together, and right after that, she was in the car accident.
Her uncle took her away and when she came back, she was different.
She wasn’t my Liz anymore, no matter how hard I tried to make things go back to the way they used to be.
Then all that crap with Ryder happened. When I found out the two of them had been dating behind my back, I felt betrayed.
I was hurt. I am hurt. I was so sure that she would remember us and the way we were before—how she was before—and come back to me.
Which she did, and then, without a word, she ran off with Fallon.
” I take a deep breath after spewing my verbal word vomit all over my brother.
Julien tilts his head back, closing his eyes to the sun. “Basically, it’s all mussed up in a FUBAR kind of way.”
“That’s exactly what I was thinking,” I tell him, not surprised that he voiced the exact same thought I had minutes earlier. “But I made a promise to Ry this morning. I just need a little guidance to help me keep it.”
“Please don’t take this the wrong way, but I’ve been really proud of you.”
I know my reaction must show the consternation I feel. “For what?”
“You used to be uber territorial about Liz. You and I even got into an argument about it at the beach one time, remember?”
“I admitted the same thing to Ry earlier.”
“See?” Julien states. “Liz isn’t the only person who has changed these past several months. You have too.”
I munch on another chip and mumble, “Even though it doesn’t feel that way to me, I’m trying.”
He side taps my shoulder with his. “You have. Were you sincere about your apology to Ry this morning?”
Julien knows I was. It’s difficult for me say “I’m sorry” about anything. I’d rather eat shards of glass. I’m not the kind of person who throws those two words around lightly. So when I do say them, you know I mean it.
“Liz has been our best friend for a very long time. No matter what transpires, I hope that part of us stays the same. See, this is the problem with dating your best friend.”
I glance at Jules and then at the squirrel that’s foraging for food in the grass under a nearby magnolia tree. “It would be so weird going back to being only friends with her. After everything we’ve done together.”
Julien punches my arm. “I do not need to hear any details about what you and Liz did with each other.”
“Probably nothing that you and E haven’t done.” I smile, and his mouth drops open.
Jules recovers, a hot blush staining his cheeks, and remarks, “Besides, isn’t being friends what you and Liz have been doing the past three months?”
A girl’s high-pitched giggle has us turning our heads to see Davis and Celeste dashing around the corner toward the football equipment storage shed located around the back of the school building.
“Just like clockwork,” Jules comments, looking at his watch, and we both start chuckling. Davis and Celeste routinely use the last quarter hour of lunch period to go make out somewhere.
Balling the plastic sandwich bag up and shoving it into the side net pouch of his pack, Julien twists open his bottle of water and guzzles the entire thing down. He reaches inside his bag and hands me his extra sandwich.
“You’re going to need this if you want to survive the rest of the day.”
“Thanks.” I left my stuff in my locker, thinking I would pass by it on our way to the quad, so I am sans my lunch.
“Can I throw something out there for you, seeing as you’re being all chill about everything?” he asks me, leaning back on his elbows.
I lift the corner of the top slice of bread to see that the sandwich is a PB&J. Not my favorite but it should tide me over until at least fourth period. “Go for it,” I mumble between bites.
“The likelihood that you and Liz would have stayed a couple, gotten married, and spent the rest of your lives together is like twenty-five percent at most. Not to mention, almost half of all marriages end in divorce within the first ten years. I looked it up.”
I crack up at the thought of my brother doing online research about marriage and divorce rates.
“Hey, no laughing. I was curious. Elijah keeps bringing up our future and stuff, and it makes me nervous. I love him and I don’t plan for that to change, but can I honestly guarantee that it won’t?
We’re young and have so much more life to live.
Who’s to say that I’ll be the same person with the same goals and the same wants in ten years?
I may turn out to be a total douchebag or be working as a used car salesman by the time I’m twenty-five. ”
I’m laughing so hard, I have to clutch my stomach, but what he’s saying holds a modicum of truth. I mean, look how much Liz changed in just a few short months after she lost her memory. That new person, the new Liz, had to have been locked inside of her all this time.
Julien opens his mouth to say something but stops. He nibbles on his bottom lip for a few seconds. “Since it’s the day of confessions, I have to tell you something. And before you say anything, hear me out, okay,” he implores, reaching over to lay a hand on my knee.
“I hate it when you assume I’ll fly off the handle about everything. It’s like when you didn’t trust me to tell me that you were in love with Elijah. You’re my brother, Julien. Never be afraid to tell me anything.”