Chapter 40
The thick branch above me creaks as I push the swing back and forth with my toe.
It’s after ten at night and I asked Fallon to drop me off here.
I hear the front door open next door and footsteps in the grass.
I smell Jayson’s cologne and his clean soapy scent first before I feel his hands at my back as he gives me a push in the swing.
“I love this swing,” I tell him, the porch lights of the Jameson house casting a soft glow around us.
“Want me to turn on the tree lights?” he asks.
“No, but thank you.” I’m enjoying the dark night surrounding us. It’s tranquil and serene.
“How was the recording studio? You never texted back. Fallon sent me and Jules some videos. You sounded amazing, Liz. I’m sorry we weren’t able to come.”
I lean my head back so I can see him. He’s upside down. “Next time?”
All Our Next Times. It’s something Jayson would say to me when we were dating. It was a reminder that we always had many more times together to look forward to. I hope we still do.
He grabs both ropes holding up the swing and stops its movement. He looks down at me, his silver eyes like a full moon on display.
“How was he today?” Jayson doesn’t need me to say his name to know who I’m inquiring about.
“He looked good. Being all wrapped and masked up was a little weird. We played some video games and basically just hung out.”
I hate asking because it makes me feel like a needy idiot, but I still do. “Did he ask about me?”
Jayson bends over so his eyes meet mine and his nose brushes my forehead in our reversed positions. “He watched the videos Fallon sent. I also noticed the poster boards stacked against the wall.”
So, the answer is no. Got it.
Jayson raises back up and gives me another small push in the swing. “He loves you, Liz.”
“I love him. But I can’t put my life on hold forever, hoping one day he’ll come back to me. I’m not giving up on him. That’s not what I’m saying. But I’m not going to be stuck in limbo either.” Getting out of the swing, I loop my arm through Jayson’s. “Walk with me?”
There were many nights that Jayson and I would stroll through the forest that butted our backyards.
When we were younger, I would pretend it was an enchanted forest full of magic.
Jayson and Julien were my princes, and I was their princess.
So many years have gone by since the day I met them and gave them each a piece of my young heart.
I hear a noise outside the fort. Could it be them?
It’s probably Hailey or deer or a brown rabbit.
I adjust my tiara on my head because it’s beginning to slip sideways, and I walk out of the fort.
I give a startled shriek when I come face-to-face with two upside-down heads giggling at me.
Dangling from their knees, upside down from the tree branch that hangs in front of the fort’s entrance, are two brown-headed twin boys with silver-gray eyes.
They’re here! I smile a huge grin that shows my two missing front teeth, and they mimic me also showing they are missing two front teeth as well.
“Hi,” I say while moving my right foot back and forth along the dirt on the ground.
One of the boys grabs the tree branch he’s hanging off of and flips over to land on his feet.
“Hi. I’m Julien.”
The other boy swings up and over to sit on top of the branch and starts to swing his feet.
“I’m Jayson. Our mom said we had to come rescue Princess Elizabeth. You her?”
“Yep,” I say, popping the “p” at the end of the word.
The boy named Julien grabs my hand and starts to run off in the direction of the creek. “Okay. You’re rescued.”
Jayson links our fingers together and tucks our joined hands to his chest as we walk. The air is so still and quiet, the only sound the crunching leaves under our feet. I look over my shoulder at my childhood home.
“It’s going to feel good being back here,” I say.
“You don’t know how many nights I’ve gone to my window thinking I would see you across the way smiling or waving at me. Habit, I guess.”
I walk over to my window and gaze out. Across the way, two faces are looking out the window of the house next door. They see me and raise their window. I raise mine.
“Good night, princess!” Jayson calls out.
“Sleep tight,” Julien shouts after him.
I blow them each a good night kiss. I wave bye to Jayson and Julien but keep my window open. I notice they do the same. I feel happy and safe knowing my two princes are nearby and can hear me if I call for them.
“I’m going to go and see Ryder tomorrow.”
Jayson stops us and turns to face me. “You are?”
“Every Sunday. I’m going to be there for him.
He’ll have to get security to carry me out of there if he doesn’t like it.
Just like you and me, Ryder and I were always friends first. We may not be a couple anymore, but that won’t stop me from being his friend.
And before you offer, because I know you’re about to, I’m going alone. ”
I feel Jayson’s exhale, his warm breath caressing over my chilled face. “He won’t say it, but I know he’ll be happy to see you. Not seeing you or talking to you is killing him on the inside.”
Reaching up, I smooth the frown lines wrinkling Jayson’s brow. “Fallon and I had a very long talk today. It was a hard talk, but one I needed to hear as much as one I needed to say.”
My hand lingers a moment on his face before I slide it down to his shoulder.
Jayson and Julien are identical twins, but they always looked so different to me.
Maybe I was just good at spotting the small things like the different number of freckles they had that bridged over their noses.
Julien used to tease me and say that I had witchy powers.
“Oh?”
I smile at Jayson’s one word answer. Not knowing how to breach the subject, I decide I just need to rip the Band Aid off in one go. “Fallon told me about what you guys talked about on New Year’s after the fireworks.”
I can feel his heart slam against his chest, his heartbeat speeding up. It matches the tempo of mine.
“And?” he says.
“And…” Jayson looks at me expectantly, waiting for me continue. “And I’ve got a lot to think about.”
We finish our nighttime stroll and head back to his house. The light in the twin’s bedroom is on so Julien must be up. It’s been a long day. A great day, but I’m exhausted.
“Would you mind giving me a ride back home?” I ask Jayson as we approach his front porch.
He scans my face. “You look tired, Liz.”
A huge yawn escapes me, and I chuckle. “You jinxed me.” I yawn again.
He tugs me with him up the porch steps. “I’m calling a sleepover.”
Jayson, Julien, and I used to have sleepovers at each other’s houses all the time. We would stay up all night eating junk food, watching movies, and talking. They were some of the best times of my life.
“Let me call Daniel and let him know. I’ll need to borrow some sleep clothes.”
Jayson’s face displays happiness at my acceptance of his invitation. “I think I have a spare CU T-shirt you can borrow.”
I fake a shocked reaction and slap a hand to my chest. “You are willing to share one of your prized CU shirts with me?”
He bumps my shoulder and rolls his eyes in an exact imitation of me. “Want to prank Jules for old time’s sake?”
“Oh yeah.” My grin is almost as wide as Jayson’s. “Do you think Freda would get mad at a little water because I’m thinking water guns.”
Jayson kisses the side of my head as he unlocks the front door, and we walk inside. “Girl after my own heart.”