Chapter Thirty-Eight
The air was heavy and humid, as though a storm was closing in. The farther Helen disappeared into the trees, the more the
scream built up inside her. She moved quickly, tripping on her untied shoelaces once and stumbling into a thick tree trunk,
scraping her hands on the bark, almost dropping the lantern. She stayed there for a moment, breathing in the wood rot of the
damp night.
She pulled the coat she was wearing more tightly around her and realized this time she had grabbed Wade’s.
Then she tied her shoes and pressed on.
She had a violent vision in her mind of her body plunging off the edge of a cliff, an unseen drop into a hidden lake she had
found once somewhere in this direction, so icy and deep that it would finally be final. Searchers in orange vests would gather
the next day, poking their long sticks into the brush. They might come upon the lake and wonder. But even if they swept the
water and found her body, they’d never find her. All the things she never said and never did would stay with her in those deep, still waters, while all the things she felt
would float away through time and space and find their way to Tyler.
Tyler, Tyler, Tyler.
Maybe she was already fading into a ghost. This was her last earthly walk, taking her into the next realm.
Something sharp hit against her bare leg and she cried out. Wade’s coat reached just under her hips, so anywhere below that
was unprotected. Her nightgown went to her knees, so her lower legs were completely exposed to rough bushes and branches.
She was sure she’d cut the front of her shin, and as she whimpered, it was the sound of her voice more than the pain in her
leg that reminded her she was still alive, still here. So she screamed. God, it felt almost energizing to get it out. She
wanted to run now, just run and run so the darkness couldn’t catch her. And just as she started to, she received a reply to
her scream.
Helen skidded to a stop.
Not too far away, howling. It sounded like more than one coyote, but she knew that the way the trees bounced the sound could
create that illusion. She tilted her head back and howled, then waited. More howling, and this time it definitely sounded
like more than one.
Maybe she could find an entire pack!
She didn’t know what she wanted exactly. Wade had shown her how to haze a coyote by making noise and throwing rocks near it
to scare it off, but no one had shown her how to join the pack.
She lifted her lantern and walked until she reached a small clearing with two coyotes in it. One was sitting and one was wandering
restlessly around the other. In the distance, she heard more howling, and then she saw the seated coyote tilt its head back
and answer the call with a low, long howl. It was two different packs communicating across the distance.
The second coyote, the fidgety one, turned and looked right at her. She was impressed by its size. It was larger than any
coyote she’d ever seen before.
“Hi, I came to join you,” she said, and because she didn’t know what else to say or do, she set the lantern on the ground.
It seemed disrespectful to be shining the light in the animal’s face.
She was surprised the coyotes didn’t show any real reaction to her, no fear. Maybe they sensed she was one of them.
Helen stood there watching for several minutes until gradually the sense of a new invading presence came over her. It was
the feeling of an ambush. She lifted the lantern from the ground, and as the glow passed over her legs, she saw her shin was
bleeding where it had been cut. She spun in a slow circle, shining the light across the open expanse. A pack of coyotes was
coming out of the woods and beginning to surround her.
This wasn’t right. This wasn’t what coyotes did.
Coyotes normally hunted smaller mammals. They only ate bigger prey, like elk, if they were lucky enough to find a carcass.
They didn’t take down large animals alive, and yet, the way they were circling Helen right now made it clear they were the
predators and she was the prey. They were going to take her down.
Perhaps they smelled the fresh blood on her leg.
There were almost a dozen of them, too many to haze, and they were so big too. She’d never seen coyotes so big with such broad
faces. Something seemed different, and suddenly she realized what it was. These weren’t coyotes at all. These were wolves,
which was impossible, because there weren’t any wolves in this part of the state.
But yes, they were here. Wolves.
One of the wolves bared its teeth and she took a step back. She didn’t have to look, but she knew the two behind her in the
center of the clearing were coming closer too, she could feel it.
She lifted the lantern above her head and shook it back and forth. “Go away! Go home!” she shouted, nonsense words but desperate.
“Go! Get!” She waved her other arm and stomped her foot.
This did nothing to deter their approach.
They were going to tear her to bits.
She dropped the lantern and took off Wade’s coat. As one of the wolves closed in, she shouted and swung the heavy canvas coat and hit its face. The wolf yelped and recoiled.
She continued to swing the coat around her body, to show the wolves that she was the aggressor and they should retreat, but
instead it riled them up. They began to growl, and one of the wolves got hold of the coat with his teeth and ripped it from
her hands.
She cried out as the coat was snatched away, and for a moment, everything went still as the wolves measured their new status.
She picked up the lantern and shined it in their eyes. A couple of the wolves stepped back.
But then the largest wolf stepped closer.
She closed her eyes and felt regret in her heart. She didn’t want to die this way. They would eat her alive, rip the flesh
from her torso while her heart was still beating. She’d feel the whole thing.
In her head, Helen said goodbye to the world.