Chapter 14
Note to self:
Why does becoming a nudist sound easier than sharing my feelings?
“Did you know Texas ranks third in the states with the most practicing nudists?” I was stretched out on one of the two beds in our tiny little cabin. “Behind Florida and California.”
“The mosquitoes must love that,” Theo said, from behind his laptop, where he’d studiously been typing away for over an hour.
I chuckled and flipped over on my back, wondering how this day had started out so normal. Here I was, staying in a cabin at a nudist retreat with Theo Goodnight. A sentence I never even imagined existed, let alone one that would be true.
I’d spent the last hour lounging on a bed while Theo got some work done. Right next to the Gideon Bible in the nightstand, I’d found a welcome packet with all kinds of interesting info.
“It’s bingo night tonight.”
“I’ll pass,” he mumbled, not looking up.
“Yoga in the morning, too.”
Now his head came up. “Naked yoga?”
“That’s what it says.” I waggled my eyebrows. “You interested?”
“No, thank you.” He paused, the corner of his mouth curling ever so slightly. “Not in public, if you know what I mean.”
I gasped and threw a pillow in his general direction. “There is it again. That was flirty.”
His cheeks turned pink in the most adorable way as he went back to typing.
I stared at the wood plank ceiling. From what I’d seen so far, the Longhorn was a nice place, secluded and quiet. As the brochure explained, the entire property gave guests lots of room to roam…freely. There were cabins, yurts, RV sites, and even primitive tent camping.
While I had no desire to strip off my clothes and join them, I had begrudging respect for people who didn’t have a lick of concern about their bodies and weren’t afraid to let it all hang out. The people I’d seen hadn’t had rock star bodies or movie star good looks; they were just normal. Like neighbors or the high school counselor or the guy who worked the deli counter at the grocery store.
I propped my head up and peeked at Theo. His mouth quirked to the side as he concentrated, and the dragon wings fluttered for no reason except Theo was Theo.
With a grunt, I buried my face in a pillow. What would happen if I stood up right now and confessed my feelings for Theo? The thought terrified me, opening myself up like that, knowing that the chances of him returning those feelings were zero. Or was this the fear talking again? Either way, I couldn’t even handle revealing feelings I’d harbored for years. In fact, stripping naked sounded easier.
“I think I’m going to get ready for bed,” I announced.
Tap. Tap. Pause. “It’s only eight-thirty.”
“Yeah, but it’s been a long day. I’m beat. You can keep working. The light won’t bother me.” I dragged myself out of bed and over to my backpack next to the desk where Theo sat. I bent down to grab it and jumped at the sudden loud click of his laptop snapping shut. Frowning, I turned toward him.
“What are you doing?” he asked, his eyes darting between me and the laptop.
Slowly, I held up the backpack. “Getting ready for bed. I just told you that.”
“Oh, right. I’ll do that too.” Abruptly he stood, but I didn’t have a chance to take a step back to give him room. I stumbled. His hands wrapped around my shoulders to steady me, pulling me closer to him.
I had to tilt my head to see his face. Blue eyes peered at me cautiously; one of his curls was smack in the middle of his forehead and I itched to reach up and brush it aside.
“Bed sounds like a great idea,” he said, his voice a little rough.
“Flirty,” I whispered. “Definitely flirty.”
His gaze moved between my eyes and dropped to my mouth. I swallowed, my breath becoming shallow. If he leaned down and I rose on my tippy-toes, we’d meet in the middle.
Stop it, Ramos. Love Sabbatical, remember.
With a shake of his head, he dropped his hands and stepped back. “You want the bathroom first?”
“You go ahead.” Disappointment reared its head. I plopped in his seat.
He hesitated, then plunked the laptop off the table and stuffed it into his messenger bag.
“Oookay. That wasn’t suspicious.”
“What?”
“What kind of project are you working on?”
He licked his bottom lip and, not gonna lie, I watched. I was impossible. “Something for work.”
“At the paper? Like the same sport article about all the sports you were talking about earlier?”
He shrugged, a definite non-answer if there ever was one.
“Can I read it?”
With a sigh, he set his hands on his hips. “What are the chances you’ll forget about this project?”
I pretended to think about it for a millisecond. “Zero. The chances are zero.”
“That’s what I thought.” He skirted around me and headed for the bathroom without another word.
“You still do that?” Theo asked from his bed where he’d been reading for the last fifteen minutes.
I held up my current journal. Leatherbound with scrollwork stamped into it, it had been a gift from Mom on my last birthday. Mom had given me my first journal on my eighth birthday and every birthday since.
“It’s habit now.” Every night before bed, I wrote something. Some days, there wasn’t much to say. One entire entry last week read, “I’m here.”
Today’s entry was much, much longer.
He laid his book on his lap. “What do you write about?”
“Everything and nothing.” I made an exaggerated period, closed the journal, and set it on the nightstand.
“I remember you doing it as a kid.”
“Oh, yeah, do you also remember the time you boys found my journals and decided to read them?” I asked in a most salty voice and stretched out on the bed.
I’d been ten years old and mortified. Back then, my deepest, darkest thoughts ran more toward how much I hated them all because they were so mean. Except Theo. He wasn’t mean to me.
He grinned sheepishly. “It was Abe’s idea.”
“Shocking.”
“If it makes you feel any better, I thought you had really nice handwriting.”
I threw a pillow at his head. “Go to sleep.”
With a laugh, he snapped off the lamp. “I did like reading your list of the reasons boys are the worst. ‘Boys are smelly. Boys think farts are funny. Boys think girls can’t do the same things boys can do.’”
“I still stand by that.” I turned over so I was facing him. The cabin was pitch-black, but I could barely make out the faint lines of his body under the covers. “I can’t believe you remember that.”
“It might have been the itching powder prank that came a few days later that has kept it fresh in my mind.”
I burst into laughter, remembering how I’d carefully planned out how and when to douse their gym clothes. “That was a classic.”
He groaned. “Imagine being in fifth period gym class playing basketball, and the itching starts.”
“Good.”
“Where is your sympathy, woman?”
“Buried deep in my cold, black heart, of course.”
Our laughter trailed off and both of us grew quiet. Sleepiness washed over me and just as my eyes slid shut, I thought I heard Theo whisper, “I’m really glad you’re here with me.”