Six Months Later
Noel
J amie said once that opportunities get bigger the more of them you take, and it turns out so do the nerves.
Big, dinosaur-sized butterflies nest in my stomach as I stare out the kitchen window.
The peony stalks in Nana’s— my —garden are six inches high, and a trio of chickadees hop around the grass in front of them searching for worms. It’s spring, and today is the mural unveiling at Cara Bean.
I have to present my first professional commission to the world, or at least the city, and there’s been a slight tremble in my fingers since I woke up before the sun did.
I hear the bedroom door open, then the wood floors creak as Jamie steps into the kitchen behind me. He hasn’t slept at his apartment since we crashed there after going out on New Year’s Eve. He’s becoming a little bit of a homebody, actually.
“You have to get ready soon,” he says.
“I know.”
His lips sweep my cheek on his way to the fridge for an energy drink. He’s still in pajama pants and bare feet, bed head raging. He’s clearly in no hurry, but that’s because I have to leave before he does.
I stretch my arms over my head and gaze at the new tattoo on his back. The iris I drew months ago centered between his shoulder blades. He had me recreate it on paper, and he got it permanently done a few weeks ago.
“What time will you be there?” I ask, chewing my lip.
I’ve kept my promise to be braver over the past few months.
I’m already contracted for another mural job.
It’s at the second Fortune location that Jamie and Wes are opening this fall in Kennebunkport, so I had a bit of a leg up in the process, but I’ve also been doing watercolor tutorials on my website, and I finally gave Vi an official three month notice so I could focus on my Etsy store.
Still, when the nerves do start in, it’s him I seek out. Because he’s always there. And he always makes it better.
Jamie likes to say our nervous systems are perfect partners. When mine is an anxious mess—like during that call to Vi or the day my mother texted to say she’d lost her passport while in the Philippines—he reaches into his devil-may-care heart and transfuses his calm into my veins.
And when his is fried and unfocused, I lend him my executive functions until he can resurface.
Jamie’s busier than ever, even though he’s only behind the bar in the event of a staff shortage.
Getting his second location up and running is work .
But we have nights, and all winter we’ve had weekends until the festival season ramps up again.
And we take care of each other instinctually, our jagged parts fitting into each other like puzzle pieces.
I’ve come to believe that is what a soulmate really is.
Now, he steps behind me, kissing my shoulder. “I’ll be there before anyone else.”
I nod and take a deep breath, transfusion complete. “Okay. I’d better get ready.”
The ceremony goes off without a hitch. There’s a mimosa bar and Cara made all of the pastries herself.
When it’s time to cut the oversized ribbon she ordered to wrap around all three buildings, Cara makes a speech.
She says it’s like I read her mind with my design.
Like I saw inside her head and painted her thoughts.
I don’t actually know if Cara is aware of my brief psychic powers (it hasn’t happened again) or if it was a wild coincidence that she chose to phrase it that way, but it felt like the past and the future tying together in a pretty bow.
When it’s over, Jamie leads me by the hand to the parking lot. I’m giddy and light on my feet, and I can’t stop smiling.
“There were so many people.” I tip my head to look up at him, eyes wide, and he smiles back at me. When we get to his truck, he pushes me against the door and kisses me like he’s been wanting to do it for hours.
“It’s just the beginning, Noe. People are going to see your work all over this city.”
I want that. I’m not afraid, I say in my head because my mouth is otherwise occupied.
We pull apart before I’m ready, but we have to be at a restaurant further in town. Jamie drives, and I’m still buzzing when we walk in.
Kate and Colin arrive moments later, Cara and Em a bit after that. Then Wes.
He was at the Cara Bean too, in the back, arms crossed looking entirely pissed off.
But I know now that he wasn’t. It’s literally just his face.
It took me a while to come around, but when I decided to look past our first few interactions, I saw Wes for what he really was.
Shy in a way I could definitely commiserate with.
A fellow wallflower who isn’t quite sure which space belongs to him.
And, more importantly, Jamie’s brother who he’s happy to have a better relationship with now that they’re moving forward as independent business owners.
At the restaurant, we eat and drink, and when the waiter has cleared our plates and brought another round, Jamie’s fork clinks against his water glass as he pushes to his feet.
“Let’s have a toast.” His hand cups my elbow, lifting me out of my seat before I can protest, and I bury my face in his shoulder and groan, hiding the red blooming across my cheeks.
Jamie clears his throat, and I hear Kate whoop before I look up at everyone.
“Well, shit. Now that I’ve pulled her up here, I’m afraid I’m going to fuck this up.
” There’s a smattering of laughter, and he tugs at his collar before turning his eyes toward me.
He’s never been able to hide a thing on that beautiful, expressive face, but still, the emotion there tonight catches my breath and whisks it away.
“Noel, I didn’t think there was anything in this world as beautiful as you until I saw you with a paintbrush. You’re amazingly talented, but you’re also patient, giving, and kind. The rest of the world is about to see your magic, but I promise I’ll always be your biggest fan.”
“I’m yours,” I whisper, and he presses his forehead to mine.
We’re staring into each other’s eyes when Wes shouts, “You have to toast, Jameson.”
“Oh. Right.” Jamie raises his glass, his mouth popping open, then snapping shut. “To…”
He looks helplessly at Kate.
“To destiny!” she calls out, and glasses clink around us.
Jamie dips his head so his lips are at my ear, and touches his glass to mine. “To bravery, baby.”
I forgo the sip of my wine and cheers instead with a kiss, tipping to my toes to press my smile to his. His lips part and his tongue slips over mine, deepening the kiss in a way that is entirely inappropriate for a crowd. I eat it up like candy. Let them see me want.
After dessert, people shrug on their coats and linger over goodbyes. The waiter brings back Jamie’s credit card slip, and I slide it toward me, filling in the tip for him. He squeezes my thigh under the table in a private thanks, and we head out the door to the street, hand in hand.
“Can we make one more stop before we go home?” he asks.
There’s a glint in his eye, and I match it with a raised brow. “Where?”
“You’ll see.”
The city lights are on, though the sun is still lingering low behind brick buildings and old glass.
The cold of early spring sends a shiver through my entire body, and Jamie takes my hand in his, leading me uphill, away from the water.
We take a left and walk two more blocks, then head up again, toward Congress St. We pass the museum, and the sidewalks turn from brick to cobblestones.
Jamie shifts from holding my hand to holding my elbow so I can balance on them in my heels.
When we get to Monument Square, a light mist rises from the stones around us, making it all feel like a dream world. But it’s definitely a real place because I’ve been here with Jamie once before… but higher.
“What are we—?”
“You’ll see.”
I look up at the brick buildings, side by side and lining the square.
He leads me toward a door at the corner of the most familiar of the triplet buildings.
We wait maybe four minutes in the cold before a group of college-age kids pushes out, slipping their coats on as they go.
Jamie grabs the door and gives them a nod, as if he’s been standing there waiting to greet them.
As soon as they stumble off, he tips his head and I reluctantly follow him into the stairwell.
“ Jameson .” I’m trying to go with it, follow his lead like I have been for months. But he also hasn’t taken me on any trespassing adventures since the fire escape.
“Trust me, baby.” He gives me the Jamie Smile, and I sigh.
When we reach the top landing, Jamie wraps his knuckles on the metal fire door, and it swings open. There’s a kid, maybe nineteen, wearing a Bruins tee and a bored expression standing there. He exchanges a nod with Jamie and lets us pass, then disappears the way we came.
“What on earth…”
My eyes bounce from Jamie’s mischief smile to the roof. It’s exactly the same, mismatched potted plants, an indoor/outdoor rug, string lights, and when he slips his hand into mine, I feel whatever force was at play that night pulsing in our joined palms, flowing from me to him on a current.
My legs are wobbly as Jamie guides us toward the edge, to the wall where he was sitting that night when I first laid eyes on him, so beautiful and happy and wild.
He steps behind me, and when I press my hands to the brick and lean forward, I gasp at the view.
My prize for daring to come so close to the edge this time.
I can see the water from here, the glitter of the rising moon and a hundred lights on the glassy surface. The sound on the streets below us rises like steam, mixing through the air.
“Don’t look so nervous,” he says with his mouth at my neck, and I laugh because I’m sure I do, but it’s not a bad nervousness.
It’s anticipation, excitement. It has nothing to do with a psychic connection or me and Jamie being destined for each other.
I know him inside and out and I know it’s a good thing, whatever we’re here for.
I know by the flash of his dimples like he can’t contain them.
The way he keeps only half of the air he needs in his lungs when he’s gearing up to say something he’s practiced.
I’m vindicated in that intimate knowledge of Jamie Bishop when he says, “Let’s get married. ”
Except I have to admit, I didn’t know it would be that.
I turn over my shoulder, mouth hanging open, and he catches it with a kiss. When he pulls away, his smile rivals the view.
“I promise this isn’t off the cuff. I’ve thought it through. And if you need time, we can have a long engagement. If you don’t need time, we can do it this summer. I want all the things, Noel.” He pauses for a thick swallow. “Am I freaking you out?”
“Amazingly, no.”
His hand slides over my hip, pulling me flush against him. “Maybe you just knew it was coming. Somehow.”
I laugh but the back of my nose burns with emotion.
I haven’t had a single vision since Jamie and I chose each other, but I didn’t need one to know if he asked me this someday, I’d say yes.
He made it clear from the beginning that he would jump for me.
Jumping with him is a choice that I plan to keep making.
His hand trails up over my neck, sweeping my hair aside to make way for his lips. It’s a long press that has my eyes slipping closed and my back arching, and then I feel him sink, his heat sliding down my body, leaving my upper half cold. When I open my eyes again and turn, he’s there on one knee.
“Almost forgot this part,” he says with a bashful smile and color on his cheeks.
He reaches into the pocket of his coat, and my hands cover my mouth.
“I love you, Noe.” He flicks the box open with his thumb to reveal a vintage looking diamond ring with filigree flowers on the band.
“What do you say? Can we start our destiny now?”
“Yes.” I laugh, that same girlish giggle he’s gotten from me from the start. I bend and reach for his jacket, tugging until he’s back on his feet and arms are around my waist and his lips are in my hair.
“Yeah? You’re saying yes?”
“Be crazy together, right?”
“Forever.”