28. Adaline
“Miss Moore?” My head swivels from the plane window to the co-pilot, who popped hishead out of the cockpit door. “We’ll be landing at LAX in around fifteen minutes, go ahead and put your seatbelt on.”
Great.
“Okay,” I do as I’m told, strapping my seatbelt around my waist and slyly hoping there’sa problem with the landing gear so I can stay in the clouds for a while longer. I tell myself that the wind speed will be too high, so we have to circle the airport before attempting to land. I pray that the grey may the city is cursed with every year will for once be a blessing, and the smog is so thick that no one can see the runway.
But then I think about the little sister I’ve been dying to see since she called me twoweeks ago, and suddenly LAX becomes the most appealing it ever has.
And I love Miley Cyrus, I do. But I can confidently assume that every person who haslanded in LAX has been extremely disappointed that it was nothing like she told us. Sure, when you land here for the first time, you have a little montage play out in your head about the bright lights and movie stars you’ll see whilst exploring the city of angels, but once you walk through one too many never-ending grey hallways just to grab your luggage, it sure does lose its sparkle.
So does the rest of L.A.
When I jump in the cab, all I’m thinking about is how long it’s going to take to get to thehotel all of the cast will be staying at. It’s in West Hollywood, which, when you look at the distance from LAX on the map, doesn’t look too far away. But I can bet my life on the fact that I’ll be sat in this car for over two hours.
When I look to my right and see the Hollywood sign, firstly, I can barely see it, andsecondly, all I do see when I make out the big white letters through the fog is a career that I never loved the way I love writing.
But it’s home, and if I shut my eyes tight enough, I can overlook the bad and rememberthe one speck of goodness waiting for me.
We landed on time, right into the welcome party of paparazzi on the runway there to greetme with deep heckles and camera flashes. Why do they even let them on the landing strip? Surely this is a safety hazard? Right?
I hurry past them with not a hint of a smile on my face and hop straight into the car that’swaiting for me, along with my bags, and I speed off onto the 405. And just as suspected, it takes just over two hours for me to step out of the car at the hotel, the highway fumes from L.A. traffic clinging to my clothes and making me feel, weirdly, at home.
I spot Nigel in the lobby as I check in, giving him a quick hug before I head off to myroom, the penthouse suite, and wait for my luggage to be dropped off.
I would say that the view from the stretched-out balcony makes the trip worth it, but itdoesn’t, not when it’s three o’clock and the smog from the roads is the only thing noticeable about the view. I can hardly make out the horizon, the slight glisten from the ocean barely a glimmer.
At least the sun was shining, directly on me, like a spotlight, but one I didn’t want to shift from under. I liked this one.
But before I get too comfortable and spend the rest of the day falling asleep in thesunlight, I duck back into the living area and pick out an outfit I’d rage-packed into my suitcase last night. I settle on a ditsy floral summer dress, green with tiny white flowers, and some sandals to slip on, and with a quick curl of my hair, I head out the door and find the car I’d requested waiting out front of the hotel.
Luckily, the school that Goldie attended wasn’t too far from the hotel, meaning the trafficI expected to run into wasn’t as much of an inconvenience as it was earlier. She doesn’t know I’m picking her up today, so once I arrive in the school parking lot, I park right by her car. I know it’s hers because I bought it for her. A 2006 VW Beetle. Convertible. A present for her sweet sixteenth.
I get out of my car and make headway for hers, admiring how perfectly clean it is, howthe lemon-yellow paint is gleaming in the sun, not a scratch in sight. I did want to keep the car for myself when I found it, but I suited her, and the coast, far better.
Plus, the look on her face when I drove it to her was worth more than a car. More thananything, really.
I perch on the edge of the hood for around ten minutes before I hear a bell sound outinside the school, floods of high-schoolers pouring out of the doors the second they could, before a familiar face, one similar to mine but with more freckles and blonder hair, becomes clear, easy to spot.
I felt my body breathe a sigh of relief when I saw my sister.
“ADDY!” She screams as she runs towards me, not caring about the people she has topush past, rushing out ”sorry’ as she does, as she bounds over to me, her arms flailing in a way that makes me want to cry and laugh at the same time.
And I do, I don’t realise it for a second, but I soon feel the stream of tears running downmy face. But I’m smiling, my cheeks hurt from how much I’m smiling, watching my baby sister get closer and closer to me. I wipe the tears away just before she reaches me and throws herself into my arms, as I wrap mine around her, squeezing just enough so she doesn’t suffocate.
“I’ve missed you,” I mumble into the top of her head. She got mom’s height like I did,but I was an inch or two taller for whatever reason.
“Missed you more,” she mumbles beneath me, pulling her arms tighter, synching mewith the strength of a year’s worth of hugs all in one.
We stay like that for a moment or two, just soaking up being near each other again, therays of sun that had the power to break through the clouds beating down on us.
I open my eyes as I let her go, catching a few of her peers staring at us like we’re crazy,or they recognise me… or both. She stands in front of me, blue jeans and a graphic baby tee covering her, her golden hair in a ponytail at the back of her head.
She shakes her head at me, the same dopey smile I’m probably wearing resting on herface. “What are you doing here?” she asks.
I shrug, my fingers slipping through hers. “Thought I’d come and surprise you. We’re inL.A. for the month, for the rest of the shoot—”
“I know!!” She stomps her foot with a big cheesy grin. “I’ve had it marked on mycalendar since the moment you told me! I just meant… why are you at my school?”
“Because I couldn’t wait to see you!” Her head tilts, her fiery eyes going all doughy. “And Ithought we could do something, just us, before we have to do the inevitable…”
She nods, and neither of us has to clarify what I mean. I wish I could spend the month inL.A. without seeing them, my parents, but that would be like going to London and trying to avoid seeing a Union Jack; stupidly hopeless.
And now I’m angry at myself for thinking of London whilst staring down at my sisterwho will be moving there soon, because of them, and she’ll be even further away from me than before—
“Well,” I stop my thoughts from going any further, hiking up the corners of my mouththat had dropped. “Let’s get going because… well… you know.”
We both look at each other and say, “L.A. traffic.” at the same time, before collapsinginto laughter, another quick hug playing out before we hop into her car and drive off into the smog.
“When the hell did this open?” I ask my sister, my eyes glazing over as I take in the signto The Rolling Pin that’s opened up on Melrose Avenue.
“Oh, it’s been here for a few months now. Everyone from school comes here.”
A laugh staggers through my nose, my arms folded. “Is that because they know JacobEmerson’s moms own it?”
She shrugs. “Probably, but I come here because the iced honey lattes and apple pie areliterally the nicest things in the world.”
I smile down at her, “You know that apple pie is what brought Jacob and Flo together?”
“I do,” she smiles up at me, heading for the door and pulling it open. “But feel free to tellme the whole thing again, and again… or how about when I finally meet them, they can tell me themselves?” I follow in step behind her as she walks in. “It’s weird how I haven’t met them yet, isn’t it? You talk about them every time you call and they probably have no idea I exist. How weird.”
Her head angles over her shoulder, and I catch a glimpse of her smile. “I feel like afangirl. I know almost everything about them and we’ve never crossed paths. But we could cross paths if you let me come to New York for a while, but acting gets in the way and—”
“And I’d have you over in a heartbeat if it didn’t.” We both slide into a booth towards theback of the bakery. “And even if acting wasn’t in the way you’d be busy with school—”
“And I wish I could be busy with school. I know.”
“Exactly.”
Her head bobs to the window for a second. “But still, I want to meet them someday.”
“You will, I promise.” I put my bag to one side and slide out of the booth. “Apple pie andhoney iced latte?” I ask her, to which she nods like a lunatic, before whipping her phone out as I head to join the queue.
After taking a selfie with the girls behind the counter, I head back to Goldie with both ofour slices of pie and lattes in my hands. She digs straight in, apples and sugar coating her mouth in a way that makes me miss her even though she’s sitting right in front of me.
“So,” she mumbles, mid-bite. “How are you?”
“I’m okay,” I mumble back. “I should be asking how you are though.” Her smile drops,already knowing what I’m about to ask. “Have you told them that you don’t—”
“Yes. I’ve told them.”
I let the sounds of the bakery take over for a moment, before I ask her, “What even is theshoot anyway?”
“Some James Bond knock-off type. But like… for teens?” She says with a mouthful of pie.
“Oh,” I hum, the straw to my coffee tucked between my lips. “Like Agent Cody Banks?”
Her eyebrows furrow, like she’s never heard of— “Who’s that?”
Wow. I’ve never felt older in my life, and I’m only twenty-five.
“Never mind,”
I pull my head back and shake it, making a mental note to watch Agent Cody Bankswhen I get back to the hotel. For my own peace of mind. “When do you leave?” I don’t really want to know the answer to this, but I have to, I have to know the deadline.
Her pretty eyes meet mine as she grits out, “June fourteenth.”
Four weeks away. Two days before the Forever and Always shoot wraps.
Her head falls forward, strands of blonde almost getting tangled in her pie. “I’m supposedto be there until after the New Year.”
I shake my head. “You won’t be, Goldie. Because they can’t make you go.” I reassureher. “Tell them again. That you don’t want to leave.”
“I have.” Her head bolts back up.
“Well do it again, Goldie.”
“Addy,” I felt her sigh in my soul. “You know as well as I do that they may as well bedeaf. They. Don’t. Listen.”
That sentence hits me like a rounders ball to the chest. Which I’ve actually experiencedthanks to Flo dragging us all to Central a few months back to teach us how to play. It’s like baseball, essentially. Just less patriotic, and muddier.
“I could scream in their faces about how much I don’t want to leave, which I pretty muchhave, and they wouldn’t so much as blink.” She bobs her head towards the window, stealing a breath and composing herself.
She’s the mirror of me in that moment, and it scares me how I know every confusingemotion that’s racing through her mind.
“You know how they are, they wouldn’t listen to me even if I was on fire. Mom wouldlook over me, smooth out my hair and then she’d turn her back. Dad… I don’t think he’d react.” Her glossed lips pout, subtle enough that I would have missed it had I blinked.
“I’ve told them time and time again that I don’t want to act, that I want to go to collegeand learn and live my life without fear when I’m going to be stuck in an audition room next.”
“And… nothing?”
My sister shook her head. “Nothing.”
I take a sip of my coffee. “Well, maybe my being here will change things.” I meet hereyes, sadder than I ever want to see them, before she drops them into the pie, still steaming on the plate below her. “Hey,” I get her eyes again. “It’ll be okay, they can’t make you go if you don’t want to.”
“I’m not so sure about that.” She mumbles, but I catch it just enough.
A subject change. That’s what we needed.
“So… is there anything you really wanna do while I’m here?” She looks up withoutmoving her head. “Road trip? Shopping day? Hire out Disneyland?—”
“Can we hang out with Nate?” She lifts her head fully, “But yes, the Disneyland thingtoo.”
“Oh,” I ponder, trying to figure out what to tell her.
You know what Goldie, me and Nate kind of hate each other. Have done since he left forcollege. But we don’t really hate each other, I don’t think. It’s complicated. But we’re not best friends, or together, far from it. Sorry, I lied.
I could tell her that. Should tell her that. But there’s that sprinkle of hope in her voice, anoptimistic kind of glee cast in her eyes. The kind that always seems to show up when we talk about Nate.
“Or do you think he’ll be busy with that girl he was seeing?” She follows up, bobbing herhead to the side. “Amber… whatshername.”
I shrug. “They aren’t together.” I look off into space. “Well, I don’t think they are.”
I never did get around to asking him, but as I said, if the way he kissed me said anything,it was that he and Amber were merely a tremor. A light rattle compared to us; a force that would break the Richter scale.
“So he can come to Disneyland with us?” Goldie asks, a mischievous smile plastered onher face.
“I was joking about that. I’m not that rich.” I say, as she mumbles ‘except you are’ underher breath.
“How about dinner with him? Why don’t you invite him for dinner tonight? You’ve neverseen the Malibu house, neither has he.” She smiles up at me, like saying no to her would crush that last bit of hope she had inside of her.
Which is too sad to think about.
Goldie was like a birthday wish; a tiny flame that held so much hope. And at her age, she should be full of hope. She should live off it, not be scrapping the barrel for any remaining morsel of it. I shouldn’t be watching the flames that lived in her eyes die out, become nothing but an ember.
Which is why I confidently say… “I’ll ask him.”
Her hopeful eyes glisten, the beginning minutes of the golden hour brightening them, too.
“But he might be busy, so, don’t get your hopes up.”
She practically buzzes in her seat as she says. “I won’t!” Telling me already that herhopes have surpassed the blue in the sky and are now swimming with the stars.
We sit in silence for a while, basking in each others presence, in the familiarity of beingnear each other, before I whip my phone out under the table, pulling up my text conversation with Nate.
Nate
16:48PM
Hey, have you landed yet?
About an hour ago. Why what’s up?
Nothing’s up.
Just wanted to make sure I didn’t die?
No.
I mean, yes, obviously I want to make sure you never die.
Not that obvious, considering… us.
Shut up :)
But, are you free? Tonight?
Another walk?
It would be like a walk, yes.
If that walk was us walking into the fiery pits of hellmixed with a den of snakes and spiders and more evil things.
????
Dinner. With my parents.
Oh.
How come?
Goldie.
I’ll be there.
And then I smile. A stupid smile that I shouldn’t smile. But I do. Because I rememberthat there probably isn’t a thing that that boy wouldn’t do for my little sister.
Hislittle sister, in a beautifully twisted way.
I look back up at her, as she loudly sips the last drops of her latte, loud enough that a fewpeople stare over. I couldn’t care less. She could do that all she wants, so long as she’s here, around me, in her hometown where she’s supposed to belong until she leaves for the college she has her heart set on.
“He’s coming,” I say to her, and I can’t help but giggle at how quickly her head shootsup, her golden ponytail whipping her and her eyes hopeful again. How they should be.
“This is gonna be the best night ever.” She says, shaking her head with a hazy smile.
We’ll see about that.