23. Lucas
23
LUCAS
S ilver has the good stuff. Thick beef stock, organic carrots, fresh basil that I find in a dainty clear box on the top shelf of the fridge. I reach for my phone because I never use fresh basil, and I’m not sure if I should add more or less. Then I remember it’s charging in the guest bedroom.
And I remember the text messages I don’t want to see yet.
I make a quick guess with the basil, rather than going to retrieve my phone. Over the next two hours, I make Ruby’s recipe from memory, her voice echoing in my head, until I’m stirring a pot of finished stew. It smells perfect; it tastes even better. I’ve never been able to replicate Ruby’s recipe with the cheap stuff I have to work with at home.
I turn off the burner and set the ladle on the counter. My heart is at peace, the way it often is after a long afternoon in the kitchen. I think of my phone again and the messages I must face at some point. I feel braver now than I have since I got here.
If I hurry and check the messages now, I won’t have to worry about them while I’m eating with Silver.
I leave Silver typing away on his computer to retreat down the hallway and into the guest room. My phone is waiting on top of the pillow. I press the home button and wait for it to boot up. It’s old enough that it takes forever. I worry about the stew cooling on the stove. I could come back to this later, when my phone is finally on. But just when I’m about to stand, messages from Daryll pop up on the screen.
Are you fucking kidding me right now? You stayed out the whole night?
I went to the dine and they said you missed your shift. We need that money, Lucas.
Answer your fucking phone.
I hate this. Where the hell are you?
Answer your phone.
When I get a hold of you, you’re going to be sorry for this.
What’s your plan here? Take care of three pups on your own? I know your dads won’t take you in.
No one will take you in. No one else loves you.
The words on the screen pull me back to reality. Daryll is my actual mate. The diner is where I work. Rent is due in less than a week, and he’s right. We need the money. The last few days now seem like a dream—a dream I’ll need to wake up from at some point.
Except… I press my fingers to my swollen scent gland. The scab from Silver’s bite is still there. I reach into my pocket to find the piece of paper with a list of phone numbers on it.
There are people who love me.
I take out the piece of paper and add each of the names to my contact list. I text them too, starting with Quin.
Hi, Quin. This is Lucas.
I get a response almost immediately.
Lucas! Eeee! I’m so excited I have your number! Can I add you to the brother group chat?
I smile. Just like that, I’m his brother again.
Sure. That’s fine.
He sends a smiley emoji.
I send the same text to Coin, Link, and Tin. Coin responds first.
Hey, Lucas. It’s good to hear from you.
Link responds with a picture of Terrance wearing a bright pink feather boa. Check out what I found dumpster diving today.
I laugh. What a goofball.
Another text from Quin pops up on my screen, but this one was sent to four other people.
Guess what? I added Lucas to our group chat! Say hi!
Three of the people I already have saved as contacts: Tin, Link, and Coin. That means the fourth number belongs to Silver.
I send a text to that number.
Hey, it’s me.
I hear footsteps coming down the hall. Silver walks into the bedroom with a big smile on his face. “Hey. I have your phone number now.”
I smile back at him. “Yeah.”
“Thank you, baby.”
It seems a little silly. We had sex last night and he bit my scent gland. Giving him my number should mean nothing after that. But Daryll carefully regulates my phone. That means I rarely give my number to anyone. Normally, when I get a text, I know it’s from him.
That won’t be true anymore.
“Are you ready for dinner?” I ask.
“Absolutely. It smells like heaven.” He holds his hand out to me, and I take it, allowing him to help me up.
My phone dings several times. I take a quick glance at it to see the brother group chat blowing up.
Coin: Welcome, Lucas.
Link: Hi!
Tin: Hello
Quin: Link, you have to be on your best behavior so we don’t scare him away.
Link: What do you mean? What do you think I’m going to do?
Coin: Share more photos of your dead turkey.
Link: Whatever. That glam shot of Terrance dressed up in his new scarf was a delight.
It’s like sunshine filling up my phone. I flip it to silent before sliding it into my back pocket. The buzzing that follows is still a little scary. One of those messages might be from Daryll. But it also might be Coin teasing Link in the brother chat or Quin weighing in on whether the Terrance photos are creepy.
Silver and I return to the kitchen where the big pot of stew is still steaming on the stove. I fill the two bowls I got out earlier and carry them over to the table with crocheted hot pads identical to the ones Ruby used to have in her kitchen. Her omega dad always gave her a stack of them at Christmas.
Silver grabs the spoons and glasses, which is nice. Daryll never helps set the table. He brings a loaf of Quin’s bread and a water pitcher to the table, too. In less than a minute, we’re ready to eat.
I sit down and inhale the scent of Ruby’s beef stew. Silver sits across from me, eagerly picking up his spoon and digging in. He moans appreciatively as he takes the first bite. I watch him eat for a few moments. The satisfaction of knowing I’m the one who gave him this simple pleasure drowns out all the fear and anxiety.
“You spoil me, baby. I wish I could eat your cooking every day,” he says.
“Maybe you could.” My voice is soft and tentative. It seems like a scary thing to say. Not because I mind cooking, but because of what cooking for him every day would mean.
He looks at me for a long moment. “I’d like that.”
We get lost in each other’s eyes for a while. I get drunk on Silver and the wonderful meal until I’m so full of happiness and food Daryll doesn’t seem important anymore. Silver dishes himself up a second bowl of stew, and I watch him eat that, too.
“The consistency of the carrots is perfect. Not too soft, but not crunchy. And that beef. It’s spiced perfectly. This might be better than my mom’s.” He chatters on about the broth and the potatoes in a constant stream of praise.
For a moment, I think I might be enough to make Silver happy, if only in the kitchen.
No, not just the kitchen. There’s one other thing that I am very, very good at.
“Hold on, I’ll be right back,” I say.
I wander into the living room where there are several large throw pillows. I grab two and return to the kitchen.
“Will you scoot your chair out a little bit?” I ask, flashing him a flirty smile.
“What are you up to?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. Trying to make you happy.”
His smile fades. “Baby, you do.”
“Please. Will you let me do this? I really want to,” I say.
He pauses for a moment, then he scoots his chair out like I requested. I place the pillows on the floor in front of his chair and rest my hands on his knees as I kneel down in front of him.
“What’s this?” he asks.
I press a kiss to his inner thigh. “I think you know what it is.”
“You don’t have to?—”
“I know. I want to.”
I reach for the button of his jeans.
He catches my hand in his. “Shouldn’t we do this in the bed where you would be more comfortable?”
“No. I want you to eat your favorite stew while I go down on you.”
He tilts his head, his eyebrows furrowed with worry. “That isn’t necessary?—”
“Please, Silver. This is something I want to give to you.”
He threads his fingers through my hair. “Okay. I won’t say no to having your pretty mouth on me.” He traces my lips with his thumb, making my skin tingle in his wake. His every touch makes me come alive.
He scoots his hips forward until he’s sitting at the edge of the chair, and widens his stance, allowing me easier access. This time he doesn’t protest when I unbutton his jeans and glide his zipper down.
“Remember when you used to blow me in the back seat of Coin’s car?” he asks.
I smile. “And we’d hide under that musty blanket so no one would see us?”
He laughs. “Oh my God. That thing smelled so bad.”
“Yeah, but you smelled so good, it didn’t matter,” I say.
I pull his pants down and lean forward to nuzzle the growing bulge in his underwear. The musky scent of him overwhelms me with want. I mouth him over the cotton fabric and exhale my hot breath onto his length.
“Fuck, Lucas. That feels good.”
I yank his underwear down to reveal his growing erection. It’s still a little soft, so I take it in my mouth and suck. It has that perfect salty flavor of a man who’s showered somewhat recently, but not recently enough to wash away his natural scent. I take him deep into my mouth until the scent of his pubic hair is thick and heady.
He threads his fingers through my hair and stares into my eyes. They dilate as I lift up and take him deep again. Not deep enough to choke myself, but deep enough that his cock hardens in my mouth. His smooth flesh is hot and heavy on my tongue. I pull off him with a pop and lick his cock from root to tip, locking eyes with him as I do it.
“Damn, you’re hot when you do that,” he says. His eyes are hooded and his nostrils flared. I don’t think he’s just flattering me.
My thigh muscles tremble a bit as I take him into my mouth again and bob up and down. I’m not as strong as I used to be. I balance one hand on his thigh and grip the base of his cock with the other, determined to rock his world anyway.
His hips tilt up, his body moving with my mouth, his fingers now gripping my hair instead of gently caressing it.
“Oh my God, I forgot how good you are at this.” He leans his head back, squeezing his eyes shut. He’s breathtaking like that, his Adam’s apple jutting out, the tendons in his neck bulging.
“It’s been too long since someone treated me this good, baby. I don’t think I’ll be able to last,” he warns me.
I ease off him, not ready for it to be over. “We just made love last night,” I tease.
He runs his thumb over my lips again. They’re wet with spit now. “You didn’t do any of this last night. Don’t get me wrong, last night was heaven, but this…” He pushes the tip of his thumb into my mouth. “Brings back memories. Do you remember that time in the art closet?”
During our senior year, Silver and I were tasked with organizing the art closet when we got detention for skipping class. The art teacher left us in there alone, and I was feeling bold that day. I asked him to lean against the door while I sucked him off. He kept laughing, like he couldn’t believe his luck, and he came ridiculously fast.
I came, too, with nothing but a little rubbing over my jeans to help me along.
“Do you remember that time with the bear?” I ask, circling his tip with my tongue.
Every summer his family would go on a road trip in his uncle’s old camper, and Ruby invited me to come along. The summer before our senior year, we went to the Grand Tetons. The mountains were cool with evergreen trees that stretched toward the sky and hiking trails flat enough that I could occasionally keep up with Link. It was magical there. But Silver and I were fucking like rabbits by that point, and going a full week without sex felt impossible. So we snuck outside the camper in the middle of the night, and I blew him behind a copse of trees.
The last night we heard a deep rumble, and I turned around to find a bear lumbering through the forest behind us. Silver covered my mouth to stop me from screaming.
“I remember how sexy you were in those tiny shorts you wore hiking,” he says. “I could almost see the bottom of your ass cheeks in those things. Hiking behind you was torture.”
I smile up at him. “I know. That’s why I got them. To torture you.”
Back then, my body was something I was only beginning to understand the power of. I loved the way Silver ogled me and how his knees would go weak when he came in my mouth. It made me feel sexy and on top of the world.
I suck Silver into my mouth and grip the base of his cock, the way I know he likes. He groans. This time when I start moving up and down, I go slow at first. It feels like such a luxury.
Back in high school, we were always in a hurry. I savor the slippery shape of his cock in my mouth and the strength of his scent. I watch the tic of his jaw as I speed up—the flare of his nostrils. The way the tension rises in his body and the involuntary thrust of his hips are mesmerizing. As his breath quickens, and his cock thickens in my mouth, I slide my other hand into my own pants. I want to come with him, the way I used to all those times back in high school.
He cries out, and my mouth fills with thick, salty cum. I stroke myself only once before bliss skyrockets through me. I whimper around his cock, allowing his cum to slide out of my mouth. He thrusts once, twice more, holding my head in place. That’s what I asked him to do in high school. I loved it when he let go and gave me the most primal version of himself.
I worry that he’ll question his instincts now. I’m pregnant, and he’s been so careful with me. So I release his cock and lift myself up, the way I did back then. I never swallowed his cum. I always held it in my mouth until I could stand up and kiss him.
I climb onto his lap and grab the back of his head, bringing him in for an open-mouthed kiss. He spears his tongue in between my lips, shamelessly eager to taste his own cum. I moan, completely forgetting about my baby bump and changed body. It’s like I’m back in high school, wearing those tiny shorts, confident and powerful. Silver even grabs my ass and squeezes it, like he feels it, too.
“I’m sorry, baby,” he whispers against my lips.
“Why? Is something wrong?”
He sits back, his lips still shiny from his own cum. “I forgot to eat the stew while you sucked me off.”
I laugh. “Oh well.”
“In my defense, you were very distracting,” he says.
We kiss again. His lips are slow and lazy against mine.
“We could try tomorrow,” I suggest.
“Mmmm. We could.”
He presses gentle kisses down my neck and nuzzles my scent gland. My heart skips a beat.
“I love you so much, Lucas,” he whispers in my ear.
“I love you, too,” I whisper back.
Maybe if I try hard to make him happy every single night, our love could be enough.