The Fear of Falling (Love Connections #5)

1. Chapter 1

Avery

“It’s for the best,” I whisper to myself and type out a cutesy caption that perfectly opposes my mood. “You both knew it was a bad idea.”

A bad idea to disrupt the status quo of our six-year courtship and try to turn it into something more permanent. A bad idea to mix business with pleasure. A bad idea to think I could experience my own love story instead of only reading about it.

I let out a heavy sigh.

It’s hard to think about anything to do with love when yesterday should have been my wedding day.

Instead of leaving for my honeymoon, I’m looking up synonyms for romance.

Courtship , affair , liaison , passion .

None of them fit right, but I think the root cause of my poor mood is the fact that Eric, my fiancé—my ex -fiancé—went into a panic this morning about the social media account for our shared publishing company not being trendy enough.

He’s not wrong, especially as we start gearing up to announce my sister’s second book.

But that doesn’t mean I want to be fixing it right now.

I’m still planning on going on the trip we booked for our honeymoon, but my flight time is creeping closer by the minute, and I’m still at the office because Eric doesn’t think we need to hire a social media manager.

While I work, my mind won’t stop thinking about how we wouldn’t have had this disagreement if we hadn’t broken up.

He always listened to me when we were a couple.

Not so much lately.

My phone dings for the eighth time in the last ten minutes, and I don’t need to look at the screen to know it’s Dani.

My little sister is…persistent when she wants to be.

It’s a trait we share, though I’m not usually on the receiving end, but I guess this is what I get for hiding from her yesterday.

If she’d known where I was, Dani would have kidnapped me and done her best to distract me from the fact that I am still very much unmarried.

She means well, but I doubt any of her plans would have been beneficial to anyone.

So I worked at the library instead of here at the office or at home, leaving my phone on silent so I could focus on work and get everything done before today.

Dani had the right idea when she ran away to Oregon last month to get her book finished.

While I thought I’d set myself up for success, Eric apparently thought otherwise. So here I am. Making cutesy posts about our lineup of romance books while trying not to think about how my own love story failed.

“I’m fine,” I say out loud and rearrange the text on the graphic. “I’m fine today, and I was fine yesterday, and I’m totally fine.”

“Fine people don’t talk to themselves,” a cheery voice says in the doorway.

I groan without looking up from my computer. Maybe I should have looked at my phone. It probably would have warned me that Dani was coming into the office. She might be my best-selling author, but I regret giving her a key.

Even if I hadn’t, Lynda, our office manager and receptionist—and, of course, Eric’s mom—would have let her in anyway.

“Avery,” Dani says, her tone full of warning. “Your flight leaves in like two hours.”

I glance at the clock, wincing when I realize I’ve spent more time on these graphics than I thought. But I need to get the whole week done so it’s not all on Eric. “Two and a half,” I hedge. “I have time.”

“Security has gotten faster,” a male voice says, “but not that fast.”

I look up, my stomach twisting at the sight of Dani’s brand-new boyfriend, Mason, embracing her from behind. They look so…happy. I shouldn’t hate that they look happy, given I helped get them together, but I do.

“I still have time,” I whisper right as a message pops up on my computer.

It’s from Eric, which is funny because his office is right across the hall from mine. Literally within speaking distance. But over the last couple of months, since the breakup, we’ve both done a pretty good job of avoiding face-to-face interaction whenever we can.

It’s really fun working with your ex…

Eric:

Do you have those quotes from Feinman Printing? I can’t find the email.

I open my email and find the message he needs, forwarding it to Eric though I can feel my sister glaring at me. If we want to switch to this other printer, we need to do it sooner than later so we can get on their schedule, so getting the info to my partner quickly is crucial.

“Avery,” Dani says again.

Another message pops up.

Eric:

I’m going to send you the projections spreadsheet so we can get that nailed down before Sonny gets here next week. Let me know if you see any issues.

My jaw clenches when I read that one. While I’m glad Eric hired a consultant to help us figure out how to scale our company, I’m not sure why he thought the week after what would have been our honeymoon was a good time to bring him in.

Dani twists in Mason’s arms, looking behind her—toward Eric’s office—before meeting my eyes again. “Give us a second,” she tells her boyfriend. In a flash, she slips out of Mason’s hold and shuts herself in my office, leaving her man in the hallway. “Is he the reason you haven’t left yet?”

As Eric sends another message, I try not to let my stomach tie itself in a knot. “Who?”

“Ave, you have to go!”

“On my honeymoon? By myself ?” My words come out harsh—too harsh—and Dani flinches, flooding me with guilt.

She was planning to come with me to Italy and take Eric’s spot, but then she met Mason.

He’s been good for her and is the only reason I got a first draft of Dani’s next book, but thanks to him, Dani isn’t spending the week with me in Florence.

Sighing, I get to my feet and wrap an arm around her.

“I’m sorry. I’m not mad at you. It’s not your fault you tamed a handsome womanizer while you were supposed to be writing me a bestseller. ”

She smirks—apparently I’ve been forgiven. “I did write you a bestseller.”

“We’ll see.” I’m joking, but also not. I want her second book to do as well or better than the first, both for her sake and for Rose & Quill.

The little publishing company Eric and I started a few years ago has suddenly made a name for itself thanks to Dani, and I would hate for us to be a one-hit wonder.

Are books called hits, or is that just songs? Where did that phrase come from, anyway?

Dani nudges her elbow into my ribs, hitting me right in my ticklish spot. I squeak and duck away, and she narrows her eyes at me. “You’re not scared to go alone, are you? You used to travel by yourself all the time.”

“That’s not technically true.” Most of the time, I ended up making friends whenever I went somewhere, so I was never alone .

Technically. “I’m not scared, I’m just…busy.

And no, Eric isn’t the reason I’m still here.

” That part’s a lie. He is the reason I haven’t left the office yet, though I haven’t figured out if it’s intentional or not.

Our breakup was mutual, and he’s known about my plans to go to Italy anyway.

Eric isn’t the type of guy to be petty, but I’m also leaving him for a week when we’re barely keeping our heads above water as it is.

I can hardly blame him for not wanting to handle the company on his own. But it’s only a week…

“Avery!” Dani snaps, opening the door to reveal Mason still standing there, patiently waiting for her.

She smiles like it hasn’t been mere minutes since she saw him.

“You need to stop working or you’re going to miss your flight.

All of this can wait until you get back, or your colleague can handle it. ”

Eric coughs from his office. Dani has refused to speak his name since the breakup, and it drives him nuts. Now I know he’s been listening to all of this, which makes his messages feel deliberate.

He’s trying to stop me from going.

As I glance at the clock again, sudden panic hits me, fueled by my independent streak that I’ve gotten used to burying since partnering up with Eric. He’s not my boyfriend anymore, so he can’t decide what I do or don’t do.

“I’m going to miss my flight!” I growl the words almost angrily as my mind kicks into gear.

I don’t bother shutting down my computer.

I just grab my purse and usher Mason and Dani out the door.

“I’ll be back next week!” I shout at Eric, ignoring whatever he says in response because I’m too busy listing out loud the things I still need to do as I hurry down the stairwell to the parking garage.

“I have to go pick up my suitcases. Water the plants. Check the fridge for leftov—”

“Whoa!” Dani grabs my arm before I can start running toward my car. “Relax! We have your suitcases.”

I frown and search for Dani’s CRV. “Why?”

“And we both know you’ve already watered the plants and emptied your fridge,” she continues. “I even grabbed the dinner you made for the plane even though they give you food on the flight.”

As she leads me to her car, I can’t help but wonder how she knows me this well. Yeah, she’s my little sister, but lately I’ve hardly recognized myself when my life is nothing but work and convincing people I’m perfectly fine. “Have you ever eaten airline food?” I mumble.

Mason opens the back door for me, and I’m halfway into the seat before I see the giant schnauzer taking up most of the space. “Sorry,” he says as I squish myself into the little available room left. “I was against taking Herc to Oregon, but I was outvoted.”

“Oregon?”

“Yep!” Once she’s in the passenger seat, Dani twists around to grin at me and scratch the dog’s ears. “That’s why we have your suitcases. We’re heading to Cascade Harbor for a bit, and since I couldn’t leave Hercules with you, he’s coming with us!”

I scowl at her, only sort of annoyed. “You’re heading to the airport,” I guess. “And you planned your flight to be close to mine so you could make sure I go.”