Chapter 27
Twenty-Seven
At the end of dinner, I put my fork and knife on my plate and fold my napkin next to it.
The conversation swirls around me, mostly James and Beau talking in excited tones about the political landscape here in the UK.
I try to lean backward to make eye contact with Keir.
But he is absorbed in the conversation, adding a comment every now and then.
I clear my throat and look to Maura. But she has averted her gaze, looking determinedly down at her half empty plate with an unblinking gaze. Her lips twitch and she wrinkles her nose like she just smelled something decaying.
Yeah, no. If I want conversation, I am definitely not going to get it out of her. That leaves Natasha, who is sitting across from me and pushing peas around her plate with her fork.
I sit up a little straighter and clear my throat. She looks up at me, puzzled.
“So how is work?” I ask.
Natasha looks like I’m speaking in tongues.
“I’m sorry?”
I try again. “How are things at work? I don’t think I’ve ever found out exactly what it is that you do. All I know is that you assist in something, some kind of way.”
Her lips thin. “I always endeavor to make Lord Grayrose’s life easier in whatever manner possible.”
I frown. Why is she talking so formally all of a sudden?
But two seconds later, she licks her lips and edges her gaze over to peek at Keir’s mother. And it all clicks.
She’s performing the role of the prim, proper, dutiful assistant for Maura. I’m not sure why, exactly, but she clearly wants Maura to see that Natasha colors inside the lines and is exceedingly helpful.
“And how have things been at work?” I prompt, asking my question again.
She clears her throat and sneaks a peek at James. Could she be holding out hope that, in time, she can work for the family? It’s the only thing that makes any sort of sense.
“Fine.” Natasha gives me a cool smile. “Lord Grayrose has tripled our sales volume each and every year that he has been in charge of NewsCorp. And I’m glad to say that I’ve been a key part in his success.”
I tilt my head. She sounds like she’s claiming part of Keir’s winning strategy involved her. But that can’t be true, can it?
“You started three years ago. Right?”
Her cheeks flush scarlet. She nods slowly.
“Yes, that’s correct. Lord Grayrose and I make an excellent team. I am his biggest supporter.”
My attempt to keep the smirk off my face is mostly successful. “I’m sure. He also has Isla in his corner.”
Natasha rolls her eyes. “Yes. Though I do think that Lady Grayrose has quite the idea. Sending Isla to boarding school will be great for her. She’ll learn quickly that her tantrums and screaming fits do not fly when she’s not with her own family.”
I squint at her, not sure I heard her correctly. Maura’s ears prick up though, and she quickly turns to Natasha.
“I keep telling Keiran that exact thing. Our darling Saffron went off to Sacred Hearts Preparatory College when she was only eight. And look how wonderfully she turned out!”
“Oh! I didn’t realize Saffron went to boarding school,” I offer.
Maura looks down her nose at me. “Of course she did. Every one of my children went to boarding school. I spared absolutely no expense or fanfare on any of my children.”
She smirks at me. It’s hard to maintain my composure, but I do.
“And where is Saffron right now?” Natasha asks.
Lady Grayrose looks a bit taken aback. “I believe she’s at university.”
“She finished taking her exams last week, I think,” I comment. Screwing up my face, I pretend to think about it. “I could be wrong, but I think she mentioned that she would be moving into an apartment near her school for the summer.”
I just tossed it off casually, thinking that my knowing more than she did about her own daughter would make Lady Grayrose grumpy. But instead, all the color drains from her face.
“She what?!”
Her raised voice draws the attention of the men. Everyone looks at her and the other conversation dies off.
Lady Grayrose leans over, gripping my wrist and digging her fingernails into my skin painfully. “Saffron told you that she intends to get an apartment by herself this summer? This is the first I am hearing of it!”
Her eyes blaze bright blue, pinning me in place. I start to realize that I don’t know what kind of minefield I’m stepping into.
Is it too late to backpedal?
“I think so… but maybe I misheard her,” I say.
Lady Grayrose pushes her chair back and stands up, releasing my arm. “I have to go call my daughter and find out why she told someone who’s essentially the hired help that she’s renting an apartment in London. If you all will excuse me.”
I can feel the sting of her words as she lashes them at me. She hurries out of the dining room and I sink back in my chair.
Essentially the hired help. That’s how she sees me.
Natasha grins at me, her eyes mocking. She doesn’t say anything but she doesn’t have to. Everyone in here knows just what Lady Grayrose meant.
After Lady Grayrose’s departure, dinner breaks up.
I stand up and start moving away from the table with the rest of the dinner party.
Lord Grayrose looks at me, picking up a plate and offering it to me.
I stare at it for a second before I realize that he thinks that I’m going to gather the plates and take them into the kitchen.
“No thanks,” I say, giving him a puzzled look. “I’m not here to clear plates.”
His answering frown tells me what he thinks about that answer. He puts down his plate and moves away without another word.
Jesus, is everybody in Keir’s family the absolute worst? I’m fuming. I need to go somewhere private to let my emotions out or I’m going to fly off the handle at the very next stuck up rich person that so much as looks in my direction.
Excusing myself from the dining room, I quickly walk through the hallways and toward the castle’s rear exit. I stop at a closed door just before the exit, a little mud room.
Inside, Lady is laying in an oversized bed, her puppies black and gray squirming balls of fur just beside her. She sits up and growls at me, letting me know that I’m invading her space.
I close the door behind me, put my hands over my mouth, and let out the scream that’s been building inside my chest since this morning. Putting my butt against the door, I lean down and let my feelings out. My hands muffle the sound a little as I feel tears welling up in my eyes.
Blinking back my tears, I have this distinct memory, as clear as day.
I was probably only six or seven, ending my first day of school. My father came to pick me up, and he found me crying. He picked me up, his tailored suit crushed under my weight. I cried into the shoulder of his jacket.
I will always remember the feeling of starchy navy wool against my face, tender from crying.
Between hiccups and tears, I finally managed to tell my dad that somebody had bullied me all day. He walked me out of school, around the corner, and then put me down. He knelt and looked at me with a very serious expression, his brown eyes grave.
“You can’t let the person that hurt you see that they’ve made you upset, honey.
That tells them that they have won. Not only that, but it tells them that they can make you react.
That’s giving them power over you. Don’t ever give them the satisfaction of knowing that they can get to you, baby girl. ”
I think about that as I vent my frustration and anger here, in an ancient, god-forsaken broom closet. Sure, I’m on the other side of the world from where my Daddy gave me that advice. But that doesn’t detract from the lesson my father taught me, not in the least.
I scream into my hands one more time, then straighten myself. Wiping at my eyes, I allow myself one curse.
“Fuck!”
Lady looks at me, growling again. I nod and wipe my eyes again, using my dress to dry my tears. Putting my hands up in the air, I quickly grab the plastic bowl of shredded chicken.
“Hey, Lady,” I say softly. I uncover the plastic wrap. The scent of the meat wafts out, smelling strongly even to my weak human nose. “You want some?”
She licks her chops, her eyes fixing on the bowl. Standing up, she gives a soft whine.
I fish a couple of choice pieces out of the bowl, feeding them to her slowly. Sinking down to sit on the floor beside Lady, I reach out my hand to her, letting her sniff and lick my fingers.
When the door swings open, I freeze. Lady growls at Keir as he pokes his head in.
“What the fuck is going on in here?”
I shrug, looking at Lady. “I just wanted to be with somebody that wouldn’t judge me for a while.”
He slides in the room, giving Lady a distrustful look. “So you chose the half-feral dog?”
I frown. “She’s not half-feral. She’s just skittish. And yes, she seemed like my best option at the moment.”
“Ah.” Keir gives me a rueful glance. “Mum was pretty hard on you. I’m sorry about her.”
“She is really…” I bite my lip, refusing to let Keir see me upset. “She’s something else.”
“Yes. My family causes problems, everywhere they go. It’s not just my mother, either. My father and James are just as bad.”
I let out a dry laugh. “No kidding. Lord Grayrose tried to give me his plate at the end of dinner. Like he wasn’t sure if I was going to clear the table for him? It was really confusing.”
Keir squints. “How embarrassing. Again, I can only apologize.”
“That’s nothing. James actually cornered me and tried to kiss me in the kitchen earlier.”
“He did what?!” Keir peers at me, his eyes going wide.
“Don’t worry, Mrs. Wolf chased him off. He did it right in front of her, almost like she wasn’t there. I’m very glad that your brother is blind to the staff, I guess.”
Plowing his hands throw his hair, he makes a frustrated sounds.
“Fuck, Ella. I’m sorry.”
“You keep saying that.”
“Well, I am. My family has behaved abominably. I can’t apologize enough.”
At his pronunciation of abominably, I smirk. He slurs it just a little, sounding so very British that I can’t stand it.
“You’ve been drinking.”
“I admit it. It’s hard to make it through dinner without drinking a whole bottle of whisky.” He looks down at me, amusement in his eyes. “Did you come in here to hide from me, then?”
I tilt my head to the side. “I came in here to hide. Not from you, in particular.”
Keir’s gaze spears me in place. He takes a couple of steps towards me and sinks down against the wall, leaning his head back and looking at me.
Something in the air pulses between us. I bite my lip, trying not to smile.
“Want to know a secret?” I whisper.
“What’s that?”
“Natasha likes you.”
“Oh.” Her rolls his eyes. “She does not.”
“She does. She’s totally in love with you.” I point my finger at him, jabbing him in the chest. “Maybe you should go charm her instead of me.”
He leans closer. I can smell the faint scent of aftershave coming from his neck, where he has unbuttoned the top button of his collared shirt. He arches a brow, smirking. “Is that what I’m doing? Charming you?”
I shimmy closer, breathing him in. Looking up, I’m caught in his beautiful blue gaze.
I shiver. “Why is my body so attracted to your body? I find your personality so repugnant. But…”
“Shhh.” He reaches out and brushes a knuckle over my exposed collarbone. “Enough talking.”