The Fix Up

Diary Room

Kiki: Ace is the most attentive lover in the history of me.

Plus, he has a big hammer—if you know what I mean.

We hammer a lot, three times a day usually, when I’m not working.

In fact, we just went to a retreat. The Long Erotic Weekend.

Day one you were only allowed to kiss. No hands, teeth or, uh, hammers.

Night two was hands and lips only. And if you think his hammer is amazing you should see what he does with his tongue.

Producer: I was asking about your opinion of Poppy and Decker’s relationship.

Kiki: I think they’re idiots. Now are we done? This BFF is upholding girl code. Plus, we’re demoing the bathrooms today and I have a wall to run through.