Chapter 26 #2
This wasn’t his royal bed, large enough for a troop of soldiers.
This makeshift mattress was barely big enough for two people.
I hated his proximity almost as much, if not more, than I’d ached to touch him earlier.
We were too damn close, yet too far apart, and it burned like hot coals had been raked over my chest.
He turned onto his side, facing away. So, I did the same, harshly yanking on the fur blanket like a petulant child. He didn’t yank back.
I tried closing my eyes, but my lids wouldn’t listen. All I could do was stare at the bluish dark void, anger boiling me from the inside like lava trapped in my flesh. My heart wouldn’t settle—thrashing, pounding hard enough that I could feel it in my throat.
The silence stretched until it felt like a punishment. Gods only knew how long we lay like that, neither of us speaking, chained to this stupid quiet sparring match, until, softly, the bastard yielded. “You can’t sleep, either?” he asked warily, as if I might chew his head off.
Maybe I would.
I expelled the irritation churning in my chest in one long exhale. There was no point in trying to mask my feelings. The asshole had heightened senses. He very well knew I was struggling to calm my nerves, let alone sleep.
“Hard to sleep next to someone who pretends they didn’t have their tongue down my throat earlier tonight.”
“Is that what you think this is?”
“I don’t know, Jack. Why don’t you define it for me, then?”
The mattress shifted and creaked, and when a hot breath tickled the back of my neck, my entire body froze. “Look at me, Syl.”
“No.”
“I know I fucked up.”
“No argument there.”
“You think this whole thing isn’t killing me, too?”
I tugged the blanket tighter and shrugged.
“Difficult to guess what you’re feeling when you won’t even acknowledge what happened between us.
The way you shut down. Like none of it meant a damn thing after I’d just laid myself bare.
” I swallowed back a sob. Uttering the words out loud had made me feel so foolish.
I already felt shame and regret for trying to start something I should’ve never even attempted in the first place.
“You honestly think I’m lying in this bed beside you, not thinking about that kiss by the lake?
Not thinking about the feel of your body under mine?
For Skadi’s sake,” he said more roughly, “I’m losing my godsdamned mind remembering how you just touched me.
The feel of your fingers on my waist is seared into my brain… I’m still fucking hard for you.”
A string tugged at the spot between my legs, but I pressed my thighs tighter. “Your actions say otherwise.”
The mattress dipped again as he inched closer, heat pressing against my back.
“How could I possibly think of anything else but you tonight? Gods, Sylvi. Tragedy struck our camp. We faced off against monsters. You almost fucking died on me again, and yet…the only thought running wild in my mind right now is of stripping off your damn clothes and kissing every inch of your body.”
“Then why did you stop me when I tried to touch you?”
This time he didn’t even give me a chance to breathe as his fingers slipped into my locks, gathering the strands and drawing them fully away from my neck.
Not roughly, but with a possessiveness that made my entire body shudder.
“Because once you touched me, I knew there would be no going back, Syl. And I wasn’t sure if that was the smart thing to do.
I don’t want to lose your friendship because we decide to give into this maddening need for each other. ”
“Not giving in might be what destroys this friendship, Jack.”
“You have no idea how long I’ve dreamed of tangling my fingers through your hair like this. Of baring your neck, your throat to my mouth…and sinking into you like I’d die without making you mine.”
His mouth hovered there, hot breath ghosting over my pulse. My skin burned where his lips brushed, where his chest pressed against my back. He was so hard, the ridge of his impressive length nestled right behind me, making my core ache to feel him push into me.
Intense heat erupted all over my body, pooling at my center, blooming over my breasts, my nipples hardening into pebbles.
“Jack,” I breathed. “You can’t torture me like this.
One instant you want me, then you don’t, and now you tease me with your words, your lips? ” But I didn’t pull away. I couldn’t.
He tugged a little harder, his fingertips skimming my scalp, angling my neck more toward him, his lips brushing over my ear.
“You have every right to be pissed at me. But I can’t help the way I feel.
This thing happening between us…it scares me to death.
” His mouth roamed over my skin more hungrily, his tongue leaving trails of warm wetness down my neck.
I moaned. Quiet, desperate. I was trying to stay angry—gods, I was trying—but he was melting me, pulling on every ounce of resistance I had.
“I’m scared that everything will change,” he murmured, mouth moving across my skin.
“Jack…”
“But that’s no excuse for wounding you like I did. And I know I should’ve also protected you better. Should’ve stripped Varik of that emblem much sooner. I should’ve never used Voice to force you to stay. I should’ve never left you at the lake’s edge…”
His lips tracked a path down my neck until he was kissing my shoulder and nudging my gown off the rounded edge. “Mostly, I’m sorry for making you feel like I didn’t want you. Because Náldrún curse me, the way I want you should make the gods tremble on their thrones.”
“Jack…”
His hand tightened on my hip. “These sounds you make…it’s better than anything I could’ve imagined. I want to worship your body just so I can hear you moan my name over and over and over…”
Jack’s hand slipped under my gown, brushing up my bare thigh.
His breath hitched at the feel of my naked skin.
I’d forgotten I’d not been wearing any undergarments.
His hand paused, and I thought he might dive straight to the spot between my legs, but his fingers gently skimmed over my bare hip and right to the area below my breast, where my injury had been.
His thumb rubbed at the phantom wound, and I drew in a soft hiss. Not from pain, not even a whisper of it. The feel of his hand on my bare flesh sent electric currents pulsing to every nerve ending.
“I know the wound is gone—I can’t even feel a scar—but I want you to know I’ll never forget I almost lost you, Syl,” he whispered, his hand scaling higher, cupping my breast.
I arched into him, our bodies flush as a moan escaped both of us. He palmed one breast, then the other, pinching my nipples and making them so hard they could’ve cut glass.
His breaths, his moans, his growls… This was a Jack I didn’t know, and it was thrilling to hear him panting, to know that my body was making him feral.
“Touch me lower,” I said, breathless.
“If you want me to touch you there, you’ll need to part your legs, elskan.”
I shifted to grant him access, and the moment his fingers touched my slick heat, I swore the stars must’ve tilted in the heavens.
“You’re like fucking silk,” he growled, one hand still wrapped in my hair as he teased the swollen bud with the other. “Gods, how I’ve dreamed of touching you…of feeling your warmth, your wetness. Of feeling your clit throbbing for me…”
The world erupted into chaos as he swirled the pad of his thumb over that sensitive spot.
Something close to a sob pushed from my lips as I spread my legs wider for him.
“That’s it. I want you to enjoy every second of this.
I want to make you feel endless pleasure.
I want you to forget everything but the feel of my fingers touching you, playing with your body like no other male ever could.
Because no matter what happens, Syl…there’s only one person you’ll ever belong to, and that’s me, elskan. Only me.”
“Oh, gods, Jack. I’m so close.”
He rubbed a little harder, faster.
“I want to feel you, too,” I panted as he brought me to the edge of oblivion.
I didn’t wait for permission and reached behind me, grabbing his length through his trousers. He was so thick and long, and once again my mouth watered. I reached below the waistband, and this time he didn’t stop me.
He was warm and velvety, veiny and throbbing. Hard as godsdamned stone.
Jack moaned as I stroked him, and it was a sound that would make the sky fall.
This was more than feral; this was desire and lust incarnate.
“Fucking Hel, Syl…the way you’re gripping me—” A growl vibrated in his throat and suddenly the room was bathed in an icy blue light, followed by the sound of ice frosting over every surface of the tent.
A bead of moisture slicked the head of his cock, and he rocked into my hand as my fingers slid over it. More moans rumbled in his chest, and I couldn’t get enough.
“Sylvi… Fuck. I… I need to be inside you,” he whispered over my ear.
Those words made my head spin. I couldn’t believe this was us. Jack and Sylvi, exploring our bodies for the first time. Drawing pleasure from each other like two starved lovers.
“I…I’m not on any contraception tonics.”
“There is more than one way to be inside you,” he said as he slowly slid a finger down my opening before driving it inside.
My body arched again, and I thought I would erupt into flames. I tried holding back moans, fearful the camp would hear me, but it was near impossible when the sensation of his finger, then another, pushing inside me sent waves of sugary heat all over my body.
This was the stars and the moon and sun. He strummed my inner walls, and mounds of ecstasy built low in my abdomen.
He pumped his hand harder, faster, and something surged inside me. I was about to gush all over his hand.