Chapter Twenty-Three
Faye
Faye’s nerves didn’t settle until the afternoon.
It might have been her imagination, but she swore Molly kept glancing her way during yoga class.
Nothing could squash the unease growing in her chest—not stretching, not any of the breathing exercises, not even her last alignment session with Senhor Arenoso.
She cursed herself for not being more present, but she couldn’t tune in to the deep timbre of his voice.
All she could think about was how differently this morning could have played out.
If Molly hadn’t come in, Faye would’ve confessed her feelings for Diana.
Would she be elated right now? Or nursing a bruised heart?
And what if Molly had walked in on them together? What the hell would’ve happened then?
The very notion made her skin crawl.
“Faye.” His calm voice sliced through her thoughts. “You seem distant. Is everything okay?”
She opened her eyes, meeting his concerned gaze. “Sorry,” she breathed, shaking her head. “I just have a lot on my mind.”
“And the meditation isn’t helping?”
She shook her head again. “Sorry.”
“Nothing to apologise for here.” He smiled, and Faye relaxed a little. “Would you like to talk about any of those things on your mind?”
She blinked, refocusing on the room. The green behemoth plants hanging floor to ceiling, the salty air drifting through the window and tickling her face, the calmness radiating from the man in front of her.
Faye didn’t warm to many men easily. Her dads were the greatest in the world, and when it came to strangers, the standard was significantly lower.
But over the passing weeks, a bond had developed between her and Senhor Arenoso.
The safety in this room, the reminders of nature, the kindness and patience he showed everyone—and everything—around him.
He made it so easy to be herself and to be honest.
In that moment, she realised it was more than Diana she was going to miss.
It was all of Sandy Springs.
“I’m afraid of this ending.” Her heart squeezed as Diana’s beautiful face filled her mind.
Their unguarded moment in the shower before reality shattered it.
She had to talk to her, but her earlier confidence had dissipated after Molly’s loud reminder of her presence. “I’m not sure how to say goodbye.”
He nodded. “It’s perfectly normal to be apprehensive about returning to the real world.
There are many challenges to navigate on returning to work duties and family responsibilities, but it’s essential to remember your Sandy Springs mindset.
Easier said than done, I know.” He offered her a genuine smile.
“But goodbyes aren’t always a negative thing.
We need goodbyes to be able to transition.
Whether we’re transitioning from good or bad situations, the fear of the change is often the same.
But without an appropriate conclusion, things remain unfinished, ambiguous…
open. Saying goodbye gives us the chance to close one book and open another.
“This is partly what the Fire Ceremony aims to achieve. It’s an evening of celebration, but it’s also a marker to reflect on our journey.
A chance to say goodbye to old habits that aren’t serving us anymore, and welcome new ones with open hearts.
A chance to be thankful for what brought us here, but at the same time to acknowledge that, for growth to occur, changes are needed.
Sometimes getting what we want means letting go of something that we have. ”
Faye considered this. “I’m not good with change.
Waking up one day and having everything be completely different was really difficult.
Even if it did save my life…I resented my stoma for all the difficulties it brings.
It’s easier to focus on the negatives, but…
I have to admit, my quality of living is better now.
I still have bad days, but a lot fewer than before. ”
He steepled his fingers. “Adjustment can take some time. The discovery of your familiar, too, will help keep you grounded and guide you through these next steps.”
Faye nodded. She eyed the owl pendant hanging around his neck. She’d hadn’t given much thought to what animal she connected with most. She’d always adored them all.
Senhor Arenoso continued, and she lifted her gaze. “Consider what it is you want to gift to the flames at the ceremony tomorrow. It’s a moment of regeneration, of taking the next steps on your path. You’ve come a long way, Faye. Whatever the changes bring, you’re ready.”
Her breathing steadied, and she forced a smile. “I’m ready.” Even if she didn’t quite believe it yet.
After her session, Faye met Carla in the courtyard. The woman’s enthusiastic waving ignited a pang, knowing she’d have to say goodbye to her soon, too. She tried to ignore the sadness. There were too many feelings to contain in one box today.
But Carla wasn’t in the mood for chitchat as she bundled Faye into the buggy and sped off towards the rehabilitation centre.
Questions about why the woman was so eager to get there were answered with just a grin or by miming zipping her lips.
Normally, this would make Faye nervous, but with everything else going on today, she just sat back and let Carla drive her there for the last time.
As the green trees blurred past, the mountains towering in the distance, Faye tried to commit them to memory.
The abundance of colour, the jagged and smooth edges, the way the air filled her lungs with purpose.
As though she could do anything she wanted—be anything she wanted. And it was coming to an end.
She scolded herself, trying to remember Senhor Arenoso’s words. “Goodbyes are good. Change is good.”
Pretty sure that was the gist of it.
So then why did everything feel so very bad?
Her old overthinking habits were back in full force, and she’d not even set foot off the island yet.
Carla pulled the buggy to a stop, the gravel crunching under the tyres.
They walked the short distance to the centre in comfortable quiet, listening to the chatter of wildlife up high in the trees above, with the sunlight projecting patterns on the forest floor.
When the wooden cabin came into view, Carla flashed Faye an excited grin, putting her arm around her shoulders.
“Just so you know,” Faye mumbled. “I don’t like surprises.”
“I think you’ll like this one.”
They stepped into the rehabilitation centre, the bell jingling, and Riley greeted them with a beaming smile.
“Hey! I’m so glad you could make it.” She eyed Faye, eyes sparkling. “Are you ready to send Pinkie back home?”
“What, now?” Excitement licked up her spine. “I thought she had a few weeks to wait?”
“She’s ahead of schedule.” Riley lifted a shoulder, grin stretching. “She’s ready if you’re ready.”
“Of course I’m ready,” she answered, but this time more convincingly.
They headed back to Carla’s buggy with Pinkie in the carrier.
The sun had baked the dirt track pale and chalky, gravel popping beneath the tyres.
Carla drove along it, this time at a steadier pace, making her way as close as she could to the ruins, where the path surrendered.
They entered the shaded forest at the bottom, walking further into the dense trees, the morning heat trapped and close.
It was important to release the parakeet close to where they’d found her, in the hope she’d find her flock again.
Over the next few days and weeks, the centre would keep a close eye on her using the tracker they’d attached.
With a bit of luck, she wouldn’t need any intervention.
Riley broke the quiet, her voice low as they hiked further into the woods. “Thank you again, Faye, for your part in discovering Tiago’s involvement.”
“It’s my pleasure.” Her footsteps sank into the soft earth. “Honestly, I would’ve felt awful leaving knowing it was still going on.”
“It wasn’t your problem to solve, but I really do appreciate it.”
“How’s Duarte holding up?” Faye asked.
Riley glanced at Carla, who wiped her brow with the back of her hand. “He’s not good,” Carla said. “Beating himself up like it was him who’d done it. I think he feels responsible for bringing his brother here.”
“Maybe I need to have another chat with him,” Riley said, twigs snapping under her feet. “I know he would have nothing to do with something like this.”
“What will happen to Tiago?” Faye asked.
“He’ll be tried and fined. Maybe even a prison sentence, depending on how deep it goes.”
Good. The word settled solidly inside her. “I just hope the animals are safe now. Will the centre be alright?”
Riley hesitated, lifting her eyes to the gaps in the canopy where golden sunlight passed through.
“Catching the poachers won’t fix all of our problems, but it should help with the strain on resources at least.” The sound of birdsong grew louder, closer, and Riley set the carrier down carefully, crouching on the forest floor.
“This is my favourite bit about all of this,” she whispered.
“To see them back where they belong.” She straightened, turning to Faye. “Do you want to do the honours?”
“Really?”
“You found her. It seems only fitting you release her again.”
Faye knelt in the mulch, her finger hovering over the lock. She slid the metal clasp open and eased the door wide with a soft creak.
Nothing happened.
The parakeet stood still, head twitching and assessing. A breeze threaded through the trees, lifting the hairs along Faye’s arms. Then Pinkie hopped forward, as though the leaves had whispered their encouragement. Then another hop.
They waited, the moment stretching, Faye’s breathing too loud. Faye could understand the bird’s hesitancy. “Come on, Pinkie,” she whispered. “It’s time to go home.”