Chapter Twenty-Six #2
How’s things?
Diana: Absolutely, thank you, you’re a gem
And no update, still radio silence
Leanne: Give it time. Have a little faith. I’m sure Molly will come round
Diana: What if she doesn’t?
She watched the dots bounce.
Leanne: She will. You need to stop beating yourself up. You’re only human
That hadn’t exactly been her friend’s response when she’d initially told her what happened—what the hell were you thinking, Di?—but she couldn’t blame her. Diana could hardly believe it had happened herself.
She shot her ex-agent a reply, thanking her, then lay back on her bed, looking up at the clean white ceiling.
At least she and Faye had those wonderful three weeks on the island. She wished she could say that was enough, but the lie wouldn’t stick.
Why hadn’t she reached out sooner? Why hadn’t she shared a bed with Faye?
Regrets drip-fed into her brain until they pooled around her.
She’d never hold Faye as night thinned into daylight, never feel the way sleep softened her in her arms. There were so many things she would never do and never say.
Faye had said once, “Don’t let me be something you regret.” But the regrets continued to rise, flooding the hotel room until she couldn’t breathe.
She forced her body upright, remembering the grounding techniques Dr Andrews gave her to calm her racing heart. She searched for senses. The twinkling city lights through the window. The hum of traffic below. Breathing in deep, she held it for a second before releasing. The soft hotel bedsheets.
Once she’d steadied her breathing, she flicked on the bedside light, casting a yellow glow about the room. When had it gotten so dark? The year, along with her brain, was running away with her. Always running. Always, always running. She was tired.
She scooped up her phone and opened the email she’d been avoiding.
Hello to all of you wonderful people!
I hope you’re having a lovely day, week, and year. We have some news to share with you from Sandy Springs—two of our own are tying the knot! Riley and Ella want to invite all of you to share the joy and celebration of their wedding day, October 11th.
Cabins can be reserved for free on a first-come, first-served basis. Boats to and from the island will also operate more frequently if you choose to stay on the mainland.
We hope to see you there to celebrate love in its finest form. Please RSVP your attendance.
Diana bit her lip, torn between the possibility of seeing Faye and the implications of returning to the scene of the crime.
The ache in her chest cried out for reconciliation, and the sensible part of her brain urged her to let it go.
As much as she’d love to see Riley and Ella get married, she had to put her relationship with Molly first. She couldn’t go back to the island.
Seeing Faye again had the power to completely unravel her and annihilate any hope of fixing things with Molly for good.
She darkened the screen and tossed it away from her, tucking her knees to her chest.
She’d bounce back eventually. She always did. But for now, she’d stay curled up, marvelling at how she could simultaneously feel so close and yet so far away from those she truly cared about.
* * *
Diana lingered on the kerb opposite her family home.
The red-brick semi-detached stood in front of her, unchanged by all the years that had passed.
The empty hanging basket still hung there, flowerless since her mother’s death.
It creaked as it swung in the breeze, barely clinging to the rusted chain.
She pulled her coat tighter around herself, the chill creeping into her bones—or maybe it was the ghosts of her past gathering around her. What was she waiting for?
She’d been so sure this morning, but now the black door loomed before her, and she shrank under its shadow. Like she’d reverted back to that little girl crying alone in her room.
She’d made her mum a promise in her letter.
To keep talking about her, not to shy away from her feelings.
Diana had accepted the reality of her relationship with her dad.
Some things couldn’t be fixed. If she wanted an apology from the stubborn man, or a heartfelt epiphany, she wouldn’t find one.
But maybe she could find her mother’s pictures.
She straightened her spine. He couldn’t control her now. He hadn’t for years. She could do this.
She forced her feet across the road and knocked loudly on the door. Her heart thumped hard, inching into her throat with every passing second.
There was movement on the other side. The thud of footsteps. Her breath caught as the door opened, and her heart plummeted into her heels.
“Molly?” she breathed.
Her daughter blinked back at her, confusion knitting her brows together until anger hijacked her features. “How did you know I was here?”
“I didn’t. I…” She glanced at the house, even though she knew it was the right one. She’d been staring at it for the last god knows how long. “What’re you doing here?”
“I could ask you the same question.”
“I…came for the photos. Mum’s photos.”
Maybe it was a trick of the light, but she swore Molly’s gaze softened, just for a second. Her fingers flexed on the handle, then the door inched open, inviting her in.
Not wanting to give her time to change her mind, she hurried inside.
Not much had changed in all these years.
The same worn green furniture crowded the coffee table, the same coals glowed orange in the fireplace.
It was surprisingly tidy—no pots or glasses left out, no dust gathering on the bookshelf, just a stack of old shooting magazines stacked by the door.
She removed her shoes, then hovered, feeling like a guest somewhere she used to call home.
Molly closed the door behind them, then took a seat on the sofa, crossing her legs.
Mum’s old spot.
“Thank you for letting me in.” Why was Molly here? She barely felt prepared to face her dad…this was something else entirely. She cleared her throat. “Is Grandad here?
“He’s out,” Molly grunted, shifting her gaze towards the TV, though there was nothing on.
“Molly…” Tears pricked Diana’s eyelids as she sank into the chair beside her. Close enough but not too close. “I’m so sorry for how things ended in Portugal.”
Her eyes cut towards her. “For fucking my ex under my nose, you mean?”
Hurt flared in her chest. “Yes. For all of it. But I want you to know, I didn’t know about your history when it first happened.”
“But then you did, and you still continued?”
It does sound bad when put like that. She sighed. “Yes.”
“Jesus Christ, Mum. What the hell were you thinking?”
Her head dipped. She didn’t know what to say. She had no excuse. “I’m sorry.”
“So you keep saying. But that doesn’t change anything, does it?
” Molly shook her head. “I finally thought we were getting somewhere. Like you were treating me like an adult and not a stupid kid, and then you go and do something like this. I wanted to trust you, but you’re always hiding things.
Don’t you get sick of keeping it all in? Of lying? Isn’t it exhausting?”
Her words hung in the air. Thick like smoke.
Diana blinked, but it wouldn’t clear. “It is exhausting,” she admitted.
“It’s the only way I’ve learned to cope.
But I’m working on things.” She focused on the embers glowing red in the fireplace.
“I’m continuing therapy. I’ve moved back to England and taken a job at Oxford. I’m trying, Molly. I really am.”
Molly crossed her arms. “What do you want? A round of applause? How am I supposed to trust you after this?”
“You can. You can trust me. I promise.”
She scoffed. “Yeah, right.”
“No more lies. I swear.”
Molly’s stare sent heat rising up Diana’s neck. “Did you sleep with her?”
She pressed her lips together, then answered, “Yes.”
“More than once?”
“Yes.”
“Fucking hell.”
The silence stretched, Diana’s neck pricking. When Molly finally spoke, her voice was softer, a stark contrast to the hard lines carved between her brows. “How do you really feel about her?”
Diana thought of Faye’s grin, of her weird and wonderful brain, her gentle, caring nature, and how deeply she loved all animals.
The way she touched her, looked at her, like she was something worth treasuring.
How safe she felt around her, like she could lower her weapons and defences and still be someone desirable. “It’s complicated.”
“Complicated?” Molly huffed. “You’ll have to do better than that.”
“I…care about her a lot.”
Molly was silent for a minute, suddenly interested in her hands resting on her thighs.
“I’m really sorry for belittling what happened, Mol.
I panicked in the moment. I was terrified of losing you.
” Diana swallowed. “I said I’d be honest, and I am.
It was just a holiday fling that got out of hand.
I do care about her a lot. But that doesn’t mean anything is going to happen. It’s over now.”
Molly nodded, seemingly satisfied. Diana let out a breath, hoping it would be enough. Hoping they could finally move past it.
“Why didn’t you tell me Dad cheated on you?”
The change of topic was like a slap in the face. “I…well.” She wet her lips, trying to gather her thoughts. “I guess I wanted to shelter you from it.”
“Why?”
“I didn’t want you to think differently of your dad or to be caught in the middle. Badmouthing each other doesn’t do anyone any favours.”
“He badmouths you.”
She let out a humourless laugh. “Well, yes, that doesn’t surprise me.”
Molly snapped. “Do you know how frustrating it is to be kept in the dark about these things? Don’t you think I deserve to know, so I can make my own mind up?”
“You do. But I was doing my best to protect you. I never want to see you hurt.”
Molly sighed, putting her head in her hands. “It’s quite a surprise to find out both my parents are set on lying to me about everything my entire life.”
Diana looked at her daughter and started to piece things together. “Is that why you’re at Grandad’s? Are you staying here?”
“Just temporarily. I needed space to think.”
She nodded. Pleased that, if nothing else, she’d raised a daughter who could think for herself.
She’d been so worried about what direction her life was going to take, but she should’ve had more faith in her.
Any person with half of Diana’s DNA was bound to carve their own path. Molly was going to be fine.
She sighed. “I really am sorry, love. For everything.”
Molly’s blue eyes met hers, softening. “I know.”
She breathed out a sigh of relief, and something shifted in the space between them. Like a fresh breeze through an open window, clearing all the heavy air.
“Did you receive the wedding invite?” Molly asked.
Her heart squeezed again. “Yes.”
“Are you going to go?”
“No. Like I said, it’s over. It’s best to focus on my new start here.”
To her surprise, Molly frowned. “You should go.”
“What?” Is this a test?
Molly released a long, annoyed sigh. “Mum. You’re one of the smartest people I know, but sometimes you’re so dumb.”
When Diana continued to look back at her, completely dumbfounded, Molly continued, “Look, I admit the idea of you shacking up with Faye wasn’t on my list of top 100 moments, but, contrary to popular belief, I’m not stupid.”
“Molly, I know you’re not stupid, but—”
“But what?”
“But nothing can happen between Faye and me. I won’t let anything jeopardise our relationship again.”
Molly’s brows pulled together. If this were a test, Diana was sure she’d get an F. “You said no more lies, Mum. But you’re still lying to yourself.”
Diana blinked, unsure if the words she was hearing were real or if she was still in a hypnotic state, standing outside on the street, imagining this whole conversation.
“This holiday ended in a shit show, alright,” Molly said, “but you were different. You’ve always been so uptight, career-focused, but on the island, you were happy. Fun. I liked that side of you.” She tilted her head. “Dad moved on, so why haven’t you?”
Of all the lines of questioning, Diana hadn’t expected this one. “I have moved on. I haven’t had any feelings for your dad in a long time.”
“I mean, why haven’t you found someone else?”
She sucked in a breath. “I…just haven’t wanted to. I wasn’t ready.”
“And what about now?”
She looked at her daughter then, her face serious, eyes assessing. “Molly…”
“What?”
“Isn’t it a little unusual to discuss this with you?”
“Honestly? Yeah. But didn’t you learn anything from Sandy Springs? Life is short. Yeah, I was mad at you, but I think once the shock wore off, I was more angry about all the lies and the secrets. I’m not a kid anymore. I don’t want you to keep things from me.”
“No more.”
“Promise?”
“I promise.”
Molly nodded once, final. “So, what are you going to do then?”
Good question. Her brain had been through the blender in the last ten minutes.
“As much as it weirded me out, you deserve to be happy, Mum.”
“Thanks, love.” She blinked back tears. “I still don’t know what to do, though.”
Molly rolled her eyes. “You do. You’ve just got to listen.”
Diana relaxed the tension in her shoulders, sinking back into the armchair. So many conflicting emotions were wrestling inside her. Relief, apprehension, surprise, doubt, all bouncing around like ping-pong balls.
If Molly could have a change of heart, so could Faye. But maybe it was too late? Even if she did go to Sandy Springs, there was no guarantee that Faye would go at all.
But Molly was right. Deep down, she already knew the answer. So she closed her eyes and focused on her breathing, allowing herself to listen.
Breathe in…breathe out. And there it was. The flutter of wings beating together, starting small, then rising, louder, bigger.
Hope.
She opened her eyes, meeting her daughter’s. “Thank you.”
Molly nodded. “So…” Her mouth curved into a small smile. “Do you want to see Grandma’s pictures?”