CHAPTER FOURTEEN
As Zak was leaving, I remembered something. Dashing through to the living room, I found the book I was looking for.
I handed it to him with a smile. ‘It’s the book you found invaluable when you were starting to self-publish.’
‘Right.’ He looked puzzled.
‘I was thinking that . . . Rachel . . . she might find it just as useful?’
His brow cleared. ‘Oh, I see. Yes, of course. Great idea. I’ll let her borrow it.’ He grinned. ‘In fact, she can have it. It’s not as if I need it anymore.’ He popped it into the side of his laptop bag, gave me a final kiss and dashed to the car.
‘Phone me when you get there,’ I called, feeling panicky all of a sudden.
‘Will do. Love you.’ He got in the car and shut the door.
‘Love you, too,’ I called, but he didn’t hear me because he was already starting the engine and driving away – back to his gran’s and her next-door neighbour called Rachel...
*****
It was the hormones. That was all. Having a baby was making me so damned emotional all the time!
It was nothing to do with Zak’s murmured conversation with the mysterious Rachel that I’d accidentally overheard. Nothing at all...
‘Are you okay, Ellie?’
‘Sorry?’ I looked across the shepherd’s hut at Rhona, who’d paused for a moment in the business of thumping a duck down pillow. ‘Oh, yes. I’m fine.’
‘Are you sure? You’re probably missing Zak already, are you?’
‘I suppose so.’ Looking at the genuine concern in her eyes, I felt my chin wobble dangerously.
‘You’re sure to feel vulnerable,’ she murmured. ‘You’re nearly seven months pregnant and your husband is miles away. But you’ve got plenty of people who care about you, you know, who’ll make sure you’re all right.’ She smiled. ‘Including me.’
The sympathetic note in her voice was too much. I felt a tear spill over. And then Rhona was urging me to sit on the bed while she got me a glass of water, and somehow, I was pouring out all my ridiculous worries about Zak and this ‘Rachel’ person.
‘I’m up here and he’s down there, and there’s not a thing I could do about it anyway,’ I muttered, ‘even if he did have his head turned by some glamorous woman who’s younger than me and whose body measurements don’t currently rival those of a double-decker bus. I bet she can get through a turnstile no problem at all.’
‘A turnstile?’
Tears were running down my cheeks now. I couldn’t seem to stop them. ‘We took Maisie to a fun fair last month and it took me ages getting my bulk through the bloody turnstile. People were looking at me and grinning, but it really wasn’t funny.’ I sniffed unattractively. ‘I wouldn’t blame Zak at all for going off me, looking like this.’
‘Gone off you?’ Rhona smiled. ‘Well, I don’t believe that for a minute. And the fact that you’re having his baby will make you even more attractive to him, not less .’
‘Do you think so?’ I looked at her sceptically.
‘I know so.’ She grabbed some hankies from a box nearby and handed me two. Then she took one for herself and blew her own nose furiously. ‘You’re so fortunate, Ellie, to have the adoration of the man you love, and to know that you’ll be bringing up this baby of yours together.’ I suddenly saw that tears were glinting in Rhona’s eyes. ‘You’re so very, very lucky. So just enjoy this time, okay?’
I nodded, having realised with a shock that I wasn’t the only one here feeling emotional.
‘Are you okay, Rhona?’
‘Me?’ She laughed through her tears. ‘Oh, yes, I’m fine. I’m always fine.’ She blew her nose again, threw the tissue in the waste bin bag and smiled at me. ‘The hormones take over when you’re having a baby. It can be...’ She shook her head, shuddering as if at a past memory. ‘But you need to forget about this Rachel and just trust your lovely man, okay?’
‘Okay.’ I looked at her curiously. Had she been remembering something from her past? Or had she simply been telling me something she’d read in a book or a magazine... about the hormones released during pregnancy that could cause mood swings?
I was feeling better, though, having talked it out. We finished cleaning the shepherd’s huts in a cheerier frame of mind, promising ourselves a hot chocolate if we managed to get finished within the time we’d set ourselves.
Maisie was sleeping over at her friend’s house that night. So as I’d have the evening to myself, I decided I’d drive over to Bogg House later and spend some time measuring up for the new kitchen.
The wall separating it from the dining room had yet to be removed but that wouldn’t stop me planning where my gorgeous shiny new units and kitchen island would be installed, along with the herringbone pale wood flooring I’d set my heart on. There would be pristine white shutters at all the windows, and every time I thought about how they would look, my heart gave a little skip of joyful excitement.
I was aware I was possibly borderline obsessed! But owning this house truly was a dream come true for me. Mac seemed confident they could complete the renovation job in another six weeks, which would then give us ample time to move in and get settled before the baby arrived.
Even better, Zak would be home by then, the first draft of his book hopefully finished and destined to be a best-seller!
My hand went to my bump and I felt a lovely warm glow inside.
I was worrying for nothing.
It was all going to work out perfectly...