CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN
The marquee was full and the music – played by a cheerfully flamboyant folk group – was getting everyone in the mood as we sat, tapping our feet in time and watching couples take to the floor for the Dashing White Sergeant.
Ellie and Zak were doing their best to cheer me up, but I was feeling like a prize gooseberry and all I wanted to do was go home, get into my pyjamas and watch some mind-numbing TV in bed. It would have been so much better if Polly had been able to join us, but she had a painting commission to finish and would be working round the clock.
‘Aren’t you dancing?’ asked Maddy, suddenly appearing with Katja.
They plonked themselves down, looking flushed and out of breath.
Ellie laughed. ‘Give us a chance. We only just got here.’
‘I’m just observing,’ said Zak wryly. ‘Getting some tips on how to do this stuff.’ He smiled at Katja. ‘Looking forward to your New York trip?’
She nodded enthusiastically. ‘Just a couple of days and I’ll be there! I can’t wait.’
Maddy groaned. ‘I can’t wait, either.’ She grimaced. ‘She talked about nothing else the whole shift today.’
We laughed and Katja shrugged. ‘You’re just jealous, Maddy.’
Maddy grinned. ‘Spot on.’
Ellie leaned forwards, her face flushed and excited. ‘Hey, guess what, everyone? Zak’s just heard his new book is going to be published!’
He smiled modestly as we all whooped and clapped at the news.
Ellie glanced at him. ‘Is it okay I told them?’
‘Of course. Actually, it’s all thanks to Rachel, my new agent.’
‘Ah, the mysterious Rachel.’ I winked at Ellie. ‘I can’t believe you managed to keep the whole thing under wraps for so long, Zak.’
He grinned. ‘Neither can I. But I wanted the story to be near perfect before Ellie read it. Because it’s about her as well, of course.’
‘I’m looking forward to meeting her. Rachel, I mean,’ said Ellie.
‘I’ve got a photo.’ Zak dug out his phone and found it. ‘There. That’s her.’
Ellie stared at the photo, looking taken aback. Then she started to laugh. ‘I’m such a clown. But I think I’ll blame the hormones for sending my imagination into overdrive.’
‘What do you mean?’ asked Zak, looking puzzled.
‘Well, I was having all these brooding thoughts about you spending time with an absolutely gorgeous model-type creature. You know, the sort that has impossibly shiny hair down her back and a body to die for. And young, obviously. A voluptuous twenty-two at the most. But while she looks really lovely, this isn’t who I was imagining.’
She turned the phone so we could see the photo.
A handsome woman with fashionably-cut silver hair and glasses smiled out at us. She was wearing a smart trouser suit and holding up some kind of award.
‘Rachel’s just become a grandmother for the sixth time,’ said Zak. ‘Her youngest daughter, Taylor, gave birth a few weeks ago. She’s decided to come out of retirement to represent me.’
‘She looks really lovely,’ smiled Ellie. ‘I can’t wait to meet her.’
‘That’s such brilliant news, though, Zak,’ said Katja.
Maddy nodded. ‘I think it’s time for a celebratory dance,’ she said, nodding over at the floor.
I’d been listening to this amusing exchange, thinking I’d be spared having to get up and dance because I was there on my own, without a partner. But to my dismay, Zak decided to do the gentlemanly thing, and was now standing up and holding out his hand, asking if I’d do him the honour of standing up with him.
I smiled up at him. He was such a lovely man. Ellie had bagged herself a good one there.
‘I’d love to,’ I told him, and – exchanging a smile with Ellie – I let Zak lead me onto the floor, where we took our positions and watched a couple demonstrate the dance for those of us (me included) who were basically clueless.
Zak seemed to have more idea than me, but even so, we ended up getting it wrong several times and trying hard not to laugh. The music ended and I thought we’d be able to sit down, but apparently not. Another jolly, foot-tapping intro started up and we were back in hold for another round of trying not to trip over each other!
But before we could begin, Ellie appeared and I asked her if she wanted to take my place.
‘Okay.’ She smiled. ‘You can’t sit down yet, though. There’s someone else here who’s keen to learn Scottish dancing.’
‘Oh. Well, I’m not sure how that would work.’ Were they trying to set me up? I wanted to go home. I did not want to spend time stumbling around the dance floor with a complete stranger! ‘I mean, at least Zak had some idea – but putting two pure beginners together would be absolutely...’ I trailed off in shock as I saw who was walking towards us.
Joel?
‘Hi,’ he mouthed. There was a warmth in those gorgeous hazel eyes that had been very much missing during our last blazing encounter. Could he possibly have forgiven me? The intensity of his gaze seemed to be rendering me speechless, flooding me with so many memories from our past.
I racked my brains for something witty to say. But the best I could come up with was, ‘Hi.’
He moved a little awkwardly from one foot to the other. ‘So... I hear you’re quite good at this Scottish dancing thing. But the thing is, I’ve got two left feet... as you probably remember.’ He shrugged sheepishly.
I chuckled. ‘You need to get your facts straight. I am very definitely not good at Scottish dancing. In fact, it’s a wonder I didn’t put Zak completely out of action, I stepped on his feet so many times.’
A smile played on his lips. ‘Maybe we should sit this one out, then? We don’t want to risk getting arrested for GBH.’
‘Excellent idea.’ My heart was hammering so hard, I felt quite breathless. And when he took my hand and led me off the floor, and I felt his hand slip round my waist, I thought my knees might actually buckle beneath me at his touch.
Pull yourself together, for goodness’ sake. You’re a thirty-nine-year-old woman, not a romance-obsessed teenager!
We walked together to the entrance of the marquee, away from the dance floor and the music.
‘I want to apologise for my behaviour last time we met,’ he said. ‘I should have let you speak... to tell me how it was for you back then.’ He shrugged sadly. ‘Instead, I had to hear it all from Polly.’
I shook my head. ‘You’ve got nothing to apologise for, Joel. Nothing whatsoever. It must have been an enormous shock, finding out you had a daughter. Another daughter,’ I added with a smile, Polly having told me all about her half-sister, Rihanna. ‘Anyone would have reacted the same way in your position.’
‘That’s very gracious of you, Rhona, but I could tell you wanted to punch my lights out, and I really don’t blame you.’
I laughed at this. ‘You know, I still can’t believe you did the renovation on the house I used to live in.’
He nodded. ‘I know. Some coincidence. But I enjoyed it. It was like I was with you again. Especially when I saw the murals you’d painted on the walls of that bedroom.’
‘Do you like them?’ I felt oddly nervous asking.
‘I thought they were brilliant. I recognised your style. I thought Danny might think I was deliberately skiving off work because I was spending so long in there, just looking at the murals.’
He winced as the band started up again at full throttle. ‘Shall we go outside to talk? I spotted a bench by the pond over there?’
I nodded and we started walking over. Already, I was missing his hand round my waist. ‘This bench must have seen so much over the years,’ I mused. ‘Tears, tantrums, declarations of love. If only it could talk.’
He chuckled. ‘A talking bench, eh? I’d be out of here before you could say “Have a seat, love, and tell me all about it”.’
Laughing, I sat down, not even caring that the wood was damp.
‘Are you cold?’ he asked, sitting down next to me.
‘Surprisingly, no.’
‘I won’t give you my coat, then.’
‘No. You can hold onto it.’
He smiled at me, that full-on wide smile that had always made my heart lift with joy. Joel had always had that effect on me, right from the beginning, when he was Claire’s boyfriend.
‘How’s Claire?’ I asked.
He groaned and ran a hand through his hair. ‘We don’t see each other much. Claire is... still being Claire. She’s found herself a wealthy man, though, so I expect she’s happy at last.’
I nodded. ‘I bumped into her recently. She was getting new teeth and he was paying.’
He laughed. ‘Really? Why aren’t I surprised? By the way, Polly said you never got my letter and that’s why you never replied. I always thought it was because you didn’t care the same way I did.’
‘Oh, Joel, I hate that you thought that because it so wasn’t true.’
He smiled. ‘I know that now.’
I sighed. ‘Mildred – my great-aunt – kept your letter from me, I think because she was afraid I’d be determined to keep Polly if I knew there was a chance you and I could be together.’
‘I wish we had been. Together.’
My heart leapt as he took my hand. ‘Me, too.’ I swallowed, looking deep into his eyes.
His firm squeeze of my hand – and the way he kept it there – told me everything I needed to know. He’d missed me as much as I’d missed him. Tears sprang to my eyes. Happy tears.
‘She’s a great girl, our daughter,’ he said, moving nearer so that we were shoulder-to-shoulder.
A shiver of longing rushed through me. He was so close now that I could feel his breath on my cheek. ‘She’s lovely, isn’t she? An artist, just like you.’
‘Like both of us. She’s a chip off the old block. I can’t get over those murals you painted.’ He shook his head. ‘Polly said she cried when Ellie showed her your work and told her you’d painted them just for her.’
‘Did she? Oh, bless her. I think Ellie was hoping it would make Polly realise how much I’d loved and wanted her.’
‘Well, it did the trick.’ He paused. ‘Rhona?’
‘Yes?’
‘Can I kiss you?’
I smiled at him, my heart full. ‘Right here? In public?’
‘Right here in public.’
‘But people might see.’ I tried to look disapproving but inside, I was feeling so dizzy with desire that a succession of girlish giggles escaped instead.
What on earth was happening to me?
His eyes sparkled with mischief. ‘I take it that’s a yes, then.’
‘Yes,’ I squeaked, turning towards him.
He kissed me then, hard on the mouth, gripping my arms and sending waves of longing through my entire body. He pulled back and we gazed into one another’s eyes.
‘Rhona,’ he groaned, and then he was dropping butterfly kisses on my closed eyes, my temple, my neck, and I arched against him, wanting more.
Someone cleared their throat loudly and I pulled away. An elderly couple were walking past, looking disgusted to see two middle-aged people making out on the park bench!
I stifled a giggle and Joel grinned and pulled me back.
‘We can’t. Not here,’ I whispered. ‘Why don’t we go back to mine?’
‘Sounds good.’ He glanced around, an intense look in his eyes. Then he stood up and took my hand, and he led me firmly across the green until we were standing in the shadows of the little copse of trees on the other side of the duck pond.
‘What’s going on?’ I managed to squeak as Joel took me in his arms, pressing me back against the solid trunk of a tree. I felt the delicious weight of him against me and then his mouth came down hard on mine. And after that, no words were spoken for a long time.
I wanted Joel so badly. I wanted his love... the love I’d been longing for all these long, lonely years that we’d been apart. And I was floating on a cloud of bliss knowing that Joel felt the same...