The Forgotten Angel Trilogy

Chapter 11 Feather #2

So I aimed for the top of the feather, and when I got close enough, saw a shimmering glint on the surface.

A nub of what could be metal, jutting out.

A knob? I was worried I might crash into it, but by the time I could see that it was, indeed, a knob—an old-fashioned doorknob made of gold, poking out from the side of the enormous feather—I had slowed.

My song had almost run out, leaving me with a terrifyingly hollow sensation.

Like I only had a few golden droplets left in that musical jar.

The Celestial key was still there, though, tucked deep.

And the pools of energy Ry and Growly had merged into me were still nice and full.

Only my birthmark feather hurt now, and not nearly as bad as it had before this trip.

Time to go in, and get my basshole soulmate. I put my hand on the knob.

Nothing happened. I grabbed on tighter, and tried to turn the knob while I was singing. Still nothing, though the metal under my hand felt warmer. I turned and twisted, pulled at it, and sang. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch.

The song was almost gone, and too soon I was on what I knew was the last note. I fought to keep singing, but there was nothing left. I went silent. The void pulsed with despair all around me.

My lungs empty, my soul flailing, I fought to think of what to do now.

The weird shadows on the other side of the giant feather were up to something, I could tell.

There was a palpable sense of excitement, and more shadows flew past me, taking no notice of where I was, but rushing to join the crowd.

I was growing cold, so I wrapped both hands around Mike.

But then I started drifting off, and grabbed for the knob again.

It had grown cooler when I stopped touching it, and the gold had faded a little, but when I grabbed it again, it perked back up.

I wasn’t sure how I knew, but I was just certain this was the right spot.

I rubbed until my wrist was sore, and then I had an idea.

I grabbed Mike and set him against the knob.

Within seconds, the knob was glowing brightly in the Abyss. So bright, I was afraid the shadows might see. I closed my eyes and prayed. Help me. Help me get inside.

Someone answered. Don’t stop.

I set my ear against the side of the pearlescent wall, listening.

The voice came again. Don’t stop.

Don’t stop what?

Don’t stop… polishing my knob.

I yanked my hand back like the thing had burned me.

What the fudge? That had sounded really perverted.

But Sunny told me my mind was a twisty, depraved place, and that the rest of the world wasn’t filled with sexual innuendo and porn references.

I wasn’t sure I bought that. She hadn’t been on Earth for the golden age of the internet, and I had. Everybody was a freak now, not just me.

The voice didn’t come back, though, and I was out of ideas. So I put my hand on the knob and began singing. I was out of Celestial music, but I still had the classics, opening with a few lines from “Superfreak” as I rubbed the knob with Mike. The warmth came back, and the light, and then the voice.

I can’t believe you really did it.

Wait. I knew that voice. I’d heard it… Revel? I hissed when my ears picked up on rich, golden laughter. Revel, you pervert. Did you really just trick me into polishing your literal knob? Crap on a cracker. Of course he did. Of course the sentient gate was a degenerate. Everyone had warned me.

His laughter died down, and he said, Listen, Sacrifice, you’re the one who put a divine vibrating dildo on it. It’s the first fun I’ve had in… I can’t remember.

You’ve been a gate for a long time.

Yes, and I was asleep for centuries. Then, suddenly, you were there, trailing bits of your energy through as you went in and out—I’m not sure how you managed that.

You came through with others, and they all gave small sparks off as well, and then I could speak.

I hadn’t spoken in so long, I was afraid I’d forgotten how.

His voice cracked. I was afraid to fall back asleep.

I’ve slept forever. I don’t want to sleep any more.

There was so much sadness in his tone, I didn’t know what to do. Revel, I told your mom you missed her. I placed my hand on the gold knob and thought about Her, remembering the awesome power and compassion in Her voice. How She had called me Her daughter. How Imriel had told me I was his sister—

The knob flared so hot, I snatched my hand away.

You’re my sister?

A thousand voices cried out at once, all echoing, Ewwwww.

I sneered. Thus my disgust at the knob-polishing joke. I rubbed my hand on my thigh, trying to get the knob germs off. Imriel says we’re not actually related. So it’s not technically ince—

Stop. I don’t care. We never speak of this again, Revel wheezed. Never.

Fine by me. As long as you let me in.

He sighed. I can’t just let you in. I need a boost of power.

I tucked Mike behind my back. Okay, I know we’re not actually brother and sister, in either the legal or genetic-material way of things, but I am not doing that. I’m a mated woman.

That you are, he replied, humor back in his voice.

Again and again. Since I woke up, I’ve heard some things.

One of your mates is still inside, and you’ll never believe this.

Another one of our siblings has woken. She’d been sleeping, too.

She was just nagging me about her mission.

Let me try to speak to her—it’s ridiculously hard to make myself heard on that side, but I’m trying.

He went quiet, and I reached out to try to eavesdrop. I could feel rather than hear the sounds of some great battle happening just inside.

Feather, you need to get in there. I saw Gavriel through my columns, and he’s fading fast.

I have to get in now. I grabbed hold of the doorknob and pulled. Let me in!

I can’t. I have to have a sacrifice. Something as important as a life.

And I will not take yours, little one. I was frantic, pulling at the knob.

I started hammering at the side of Sanctuary with the dildo, wondering if I could use it to break a hole.

But it wasn’t changing into some sort of Celestial blade or light saber. It didn’t matter to anyone but me.

I froze. Take Mr. Oxbig.

What? Who?

I grabbed hold of the doorknob. Take Mike.

This is what the Singer of All Songs gave me when I entered the Celestial Realm.

It’s the only thing I can give. It’s all I have.

Think about it—it must have serious power in it.

It’s fully rechargeable. And you’re stuck here, right?

Wouldn’t it be less boring with a… I didn’t want to say friend.

But sex toy seemed gross. This was my pseudo-brother, after all. Uh, with something to make you smile?

Everything was silent for a moment, and then the knob began to glow again. I really hoped it wasn’t his dick. Who knew which parts of him had transformed into what when he became the gate?

I accept your sacrifice, even though I’m not certain it’ll buy you a wide enough doorway. Move fast, and try anyway. I’m pretty sure they’re praying for a miracle. They’ll laugh so hard when they see it’s you.

They won’t laugh. They may try to squish me like a bug. I thought about the Guides seeing me come through the door as a Celestial Messenger. Not that I had the song anymore. But I still had the Celestial Message Imriel had wrapped in it. I could tell them that.

The thought worked me right up.

Go fast, little sacrifice, Revel shouted as a crack opened up in the side of Sanctuary’s pearly shell.

It was nowhere near big enough for me to squeeze through, but I darted for it anyway, pulling at the edges of it with my fingers to widen it.

At some point, while I wriggled and scraped my way through, Mike vanished.

But I didn’t care, because when I came tumbling out the other side, scratched up from what had felt like a thousand sharp ends of magical wire, I smacked right into someone.

Eyes that I had never seen, but knew at once, met mine and flew wide. “Sister?”

I knew this woman. Her shape, her form. I’d stared at her for hours, talked to her while she slept, and checked on her when some of the ashholes in this realm had started talking about chopping her up for parts. She wasn’t Dina, my earthly sister. This was Arabella.

But she was somehow a part of me. A twin. The word rang with truth when I repeated it back to her. “Sister?”

There was music everywhere, and the sounds of people dying.

Screams, flickering lights, and metal clanging.

And memories began flooding my mind, endless…

dances? But not exactly. The two of us had been moving, spinning together somewhere, for years and years.

Singing, and laughing. I shook my head, trying to remember her name, as the woman grabbed my hands.

She was Arabella, the one I’d overheard Imriel talking about.

He’d called her something else, I knew that, but those eyes—those eyes, and the spirit within them, belonged to the one I’d named… “Beauty?”

She lifted me off the ground in a wild hug. “Feather! I thought I’d never see you again.”

Over her shoulder, I could see a wraithlike shadow prowling toward us. I choked a warning—“Watch out!”—right as it lunged for us.

“Fuck’s sake,” she muttered, spinning around and making a motion with her hand, while singing a note that was so high, it would have shattered every wineglass in existence on Earth. The open space all around the Great Gate—which was now closed behind me—froze. Time froze, or at least slowed.

And the rest of the memories of this woman, my found sister, washed through my mind like a tsunami.

It was overwhelming. I had thought I was alone all those years.

But I’d had her from before the beginning.

She held onto me as I recalled every moment of the years in the Well. “It was years, wasn’t it?”

“More than a few,” she whispered back. “Decades, at least. When I entered that stream, I lost so much of myself. I knew it would be difficult to navigate, but I needed to help Revel. It was the only way. And then I met you, coming through—”

For a moment, we were in the Well again together, a place without words or language, only music. A divine music that shaped us as we spun.

I’d been singing alone, singing my name… when something had struck me. Damaged me, and my voice faltered. I’d cried out for help. And help had arrived.

Who are you, little one? The voice was smooth and sweet, and dulled the ache of the damaged part of my song-self.

I don’t know, I answered, surprised I could answer. Then delighted to have someone there, even if I was damaged. Did you smoosh me? The presence was glittering and glowing much brighter than me. Maybe some of her glitter had come off on me. Maybe I would be as beautiful as her now.

It wasn’t me. She danced around me, the colors of her name song running brightly through her melody. BeautyBeautyBeauty, it sang. I didn’t want to look away.

I’ll call you Feather, she hummed at last.

Why? It seemed like a very small name for a soul as… significant as I would be. Yes, I would be the leader of all the souls. They would sing my name, they would sing—

Feather, tiny little Feather, the beautiful one sang, twirling me around. Everyone will sing for you. Everyone will honor you.

Tiny? I’d show her. I sang my song louder. Then louder. Then… too loud. I went spinning away from the stream of spirit-song, and only her bright green descant caught me before I careened into the silent spaces. She really was much bigger than me. That didn’t seem fair.

You’re so beautiful, she hummed. So familiar. Are we family? It feels like it. Keep me company, beautiful Feather. Don’t leave me.

I won’t leave, I promised, pressing myself to her so that we danced together. I’ll stick right to you, no matter what. But you’re the beautiful one.

My Beauty.

The memories expanded, and suddenly I could recall the thousands of verses we had sung as we followed the stream of spirit song to our destination, the opening of the Well of Souls in the Maker Hall. “I remember now. We crashed into each other, and you smashed me flat!”

“Not flat! And you crashed into me.” Her laughter rang out, clear and high, over the muted clamor of the slo-mo battle going on around us. I noted a trickle of sweat falling down her cheek, and knew what she was doing was hard.

“We don’t have long to talk, Beauty, do we?” I held onto her, not wanting to let her go, not for an instant.

“We don’t. Feather, Gavriel told me a long story.” Her eyes flashed with distant lightning. “He said you were in the Celestial Realm.” I nodded. “But how did you get back through the gate just now?” Her eyes fell on my wings. “What did you sacrifice?”

“The gift I got when I entered the Celestial gate,” I said, sighing heavily. “I’ll miss that dildo.”

Her face split into a smile. “You always did tell the best jokes, Feather.” She waited a beat, but I just quirked an eyebrow and brought my memory of receiving Mike to the front of my mind. That set her laughter off again; she couldn’t breathe for a few minutes.

“So, fill me in?” I said, noting a shadow that was slo-mo moving toward us. Beauty—Arabella—was empty-handed. I didn’t have any weapons to fight with either now. Not that Mike would have come in handy for fighting shadow demons, but I had a feeling I was going to need to help her out pretty soon.

She let out a small growl, clenching her teeth. Was that a trickle of blood coming from her nose?

“What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” I couldn’t see any physical damage, but she might have been hurt already.

“I’m weaker than I should be. Talking is hard, but thoughts are harder.

I came here for Revel. I’ve shared my message, practically begging him to come home.

And I need to use the power I’m hauling around, and soon.

But he’s being an ass, as usual. He keeps talking about a dark feather. Says he has to stay.”

“Did he mean me?”

She shook her head slightly and the blood flowed faster. “Not you. But this is his only chance to escape. This realm… it’s falling to the Abyss. Seraphiel made a hole big enough for a shadow army to get through. We don’t have weapons. We don’t have anything.”

The world around us started to speed up again, and I saw the shadow zip closer. It reared up, and Arabella and I practically fell over each other, both struggling to push the other behind us. Both of us trying to sacrifice ourselves… and then it was too late. We couldn’t save ourselves.

Because Gavriel had already done it.