Chapter 27
Feather
Iwoke to the smell of burned flesh and singed feathers, and the sound of weeping. A blanket—no, some form of net, made of golden light—lay tangled around my knees, and I kicked it down. It sank into the floor when it landed, vanishing.
“Rumple?” He was seated on a chair, head cradled in his hands, his wings and tail wrapped around him as if he were in deep grief. Or ashamed.
On his lap lay two long, brilliant Celestial swords.
To my left, I heard labored breathing. I didn’t turn to see. I knew, somehow, when I did, everything would change.
Rumple lifted his head after a moment, and his face was shining with a terrifying fire and a matching anguish as he spoke. “He needs you, little sacri…” He couldn’t say the final word, and that was what forced my head to the side.
Gavriel lay next to me, his hair half over his face.
He was still flecked with glitter, his golden skin shimmering between the streaks of purple and dark gray.
I hadn’t had many chances to just look at Gavriel this close, while he was sleeping.
He was so beautiful, it almost hurt. His nose, his cheeks and chiseled jawline.
I loved the strong curve of his shoulders and…
My thoughts stuttered to a halt. “Rumple. What did you do?”
My gut churned as I took in all of Gavriel. All that was left.
I leaned over the side of the bed, throwing up the meager contents of my stomach as the horror of what I was seeing consumed me.
“He only did what I asked him to.”
Gavriel’s voice had me sitting up so suddenly, my vision went dark for a moment. I sucked in a slow breath, then another, and turned back to him, fighting not to let my horror show. “Gavriel. What did you do?”
He sat up slowly, gingerly, with an odd half-smile on his face, though lines of strain remained around his eyes.
“I did what I needed to.” My eyes fell to the shoulders that were bare except for white bandages, wrapped around each side.
And beyond that, more white, an expanse of sheets. Not the gold that should be there.
I knew why Rumple was crying. And where the swords had come from.
Gavriel’s wings were gone.
“You…” I wanted to say mutilated yourself, but it was too cruel. “Why?” My face was wet, my mind wheeling.
He flexed his hands, making fists, then relaxing.
Getting used to the feeling of his arms without the glorious, sweeping golden wings that had balanced him for thousands upon thousands of years.
I could tell each movement was painful. “The Singer of Songs spoke to me only once in all my long life. It was when you left. She sent me a vision when I was alone in the nursery. She said I had another chance. ‘Let her teach you how to love.’ And I listened. At last, after centuries of not understanding, not seeing, I opened my eyes and my ears and my heart. I saw all that you had done, and knew that it was now my turn. My chance to show that I’ve learned how to love. From you.”
I dissolved into tears and fell back on the sheets, sick with remorse. Had I had something to do with this? Had Gavriel somehow imagined I needed or wanted this sort of sacrifice to prove himself?
“Shh, love, no. No, never,” he replied to my frantic thoughts.
Gathering me in his arms, he set me gently on his lap, like a treasure he was protecting.
“I did this for us. And for myself. I always wondered, if the time came, if I had a moment when I had to choose what was right and difficult, over the easier, less painful path, what would I do? Would I rise to the call of sacrifice? I realized for you, and for my heart’s friend, Seraphiel, the answer was clear.
I would give my wings and more to see you safe and happy. ”
His fingers were feather-soft in my hair, his breath warm on my cheek.
“Feather, I love you. I know you can’t love me, not yet.
But true love doesn’t require reciprocation.
It’s like grace, the sunrise in the morning.
It expects nothing in return, only the chance to shine down on a lifted face.
It’s like the rain that falls on Earth, my love.
It falls on sinner and saint alike.” His hand cupped my cheek.
I sniffled. “I hope you think I’m the sinner in that metaphor, because I’m no saint.” I looked up through tear-swollen eyes, and he tapped my nose.
“Are you sure, little soul? I can only see perfection when I look at you.”
It was ridiculous. I was snotty and tear-stained, covered with smut and glitter, and drained from the stress and anxiety of the past few days.
Exhausted from not being near Mikhail and Righteous.
And yet, when he declared me perfect, his voice rang so brightly with the truth, that the whole Hall echoed the tone.
“You love me?” I asked, almost afraid to believe it.
“With everything I am.” He pressed a kiss to my knuckles, smiling ruefully. “Though there’s not quite as much of me now.”
My heart finished breaking, and I lunged for his lips, trying to show him how much I loved him. Wanted him. How I had forgiven him.
And how proud I was to be his soulmate.
“No, Feather,” he said, gently pushing me away. “You don’t need to do this.” His breathing was uneven, but I wasn’t sure why. Had I hurt him?
“Are you in pain? I won’t touch you if it damages you.”
His smile returned, wider. “When you touch me, I feel nothing but joy. And pleasure.” That was true as well.
“Oh.” Suddenly, I felt inexplicably shy.
He could still reject me; he had done so before with dismissive glances, cold stares, and harsh words.
The memory of him calling me trash and wishing me gone was still in my mind.
But this Gavriel, the man before me now, seemed as removed from that one as night and day.
“In that case, if it doesn’t hurt, would you mind if we, um…” I took a deep breath, mustering my courage. “I’d like very much to get the mating ceremony I didn’t have four hundred years ago.”
“Now?” His voice cracked slightly, and I nodded. “Are you certain?” His eyes darted to Rumple, who was still hunched over, his head still in his hands, as if he couldn’t look up and see his friend.
I heard a soft plea from him. “Please, little sacrifice. Please hold him.”
Gently this time, I wrapped my arms around Gavriel’s waist and turned my face up to his. “I would love to make love with you, my mate. And to join with your soul.”
He answered, and I knew somehow that his words were formal.
A vow. “I take you into my arms, my heart, and my soul, to cherish and protect from this day until the end of eternity. When the stars die, and all the realms become a forgotten song, still my love for you will remain. I will live in your heart, and you in mine, from now on.”
Then his lips were on mine, and his soul was wide open.
There were roses there, yes. But Gavriel’s soul was made of music.
It was an ocean of glorious sound, that swept me away and buoyed me up as his hands and mouth learned the curves of my body.
My hands moved to his thick golden hair as his skated gently over my face and shoulders, so light it felt like the edge of a feather brushing my skin.
“You’re perfect,” I said, tracing the curve of his ear, then his jawline, running my fingertips down his neck and smiling at the goosebumps that rose on his skin.
“You know better than that,” he replied, leaning over me, pressing my body into the soft sheets as his mouth descended to mine.
At some point, he had removed his leather trousers and now there was nothing between us.
I felt his hard length press against my thigh and arched up.
“Slowly, love,” he admonished, pulling away slightly as he returned to his task of exploring my mouth with his tongue.
I knew I shouldn’t compare my mates, but Gavriel’s leisurely kiss had more raw emotion in it than any I’d ever felt.
And when he dropped to my neck, nibbling and licking his way to my breasts, with his clever fingers moving along the edges of my outstretched wings, every sensation felt new.
As if it were my first time being touched.
I felt a climax begin to build. As if he felt it, too, he backed off once more, blowing cool air across my overheated flesh.
The feather in my chest ached as he pressed his lips to it. “All along,” he whispered into my skin, his tongue tracing the edges. “You were here all along.” Then he lavished my nipples with attention, bringing me close to the edge of orgasm twice before he dropped lower.
His slow, intentional movements were driving me to madness.
I whipped my head back and forth, wanting to beg him to go even lower, and opened my eyes to see Rumple staring at me.
His horns glinted in the low light, and he had a hand on his long, ridged cock, pumping every bit as slowly as Gavriel was moving.
His eyes were hungry, avid, as Gavriel finally reached the apex of my thighs and hummed, the vibrations traveling down into my clit.
I moved my thighs apart eagerly, and he began a maddeningly slow, circular route to reach my clit. I was pulsing with need, feeling as if I might spontaneously combust, when he finally drew it into his mouth and sucked gently.
“You’re killing me,” I managed to say, tears pricking my eyes for some reason. “Please. More, Gav. Please.”
He hummed again, moving his tongue around my clit as he sucked, like he was tasting every molecule, cataloging each particle of me.
Patience, he thought, and went back to slow-motion work, his hands holding my thighs apart when I attempted to slam them shut in frustration.
I found myself holding my breath, trying to force the climax, but every time I did so, Gavriel backed off.
After what felt like an hour of torment, Gavriel stopped entirely and pulled back, smiling down at me. “Now you’re ready,” he said gently, his eyes molten blue and gold spirals that were vaguely hypnotic.