Chapter 4 #3
That was a strong word. “I’m not, I just—this feels like our first good sign from the universe, you know?”
Gabriel stared at him. “You think a premonition of your death is a good sign?”
“I mean, no, but it shows we have options. The future can change. We might already have changed it, so why can’t we again? Last week, your death was the only path we knew, and now look. We’ve got it down to a fifty-fifty shot.”
“We’ve bettered my odds at the expense of yours. How comforting.” Sarcasm was a dangerous weapon when wielded by someone as scornful as Gabriel.
“The point I’m trying to make is, we know there are other paths out there now.”
“I choose to stay on this one.” Gabriel yanked away and to his feet, leaving behind a smear in the dust. “It’s not worth the risk. We leave it be, let the future happen as it’s supposed to. If trying to save me is going to get you killed, I don’t want it. I won’t do it.”
There was a bruise in Miles’s chest, one he wanted to press harder. It was a good kind of pain, the sweetest sting. He selfishly wished he could bottle this moment—Gabriel, defiant and afraid for him, willing to do something so irrational and stupid to keep Miles safe—and tuck it away to keep.
“You know I won’t do that. I promised you.” He’d told Gabriel, that night in the graveyard, that he wouldn’t leave him to face his fate alone.
“I don’t care about your promise,” Gabriel said fiercely, spitting the words from between clenched teeth. “Take it back. I don’t want it anymore.”
He was ready to walk away. It played out in Miles’s mind with crystal clarity: unanswered phone calls, ignored texts, a locked iron gate. Gabriel could make it happen, and there was nothing Miles could do to stop him.
Except, possibly, one thing.
“That decision might be what puts us on the path where I die. Because I’ll keep going alone.
We both know we’re going to end up in that tomb, and if you’re not there with me, watching my back…
” He let his words hang long enough for Gabriel to fill in the blank.
“The vision might be a warning that if you give up now, your death becomes mine.”
It was manipulative of him, but not untrue. They couldn’t separate now, Jocelyn never would’ve involved him if he couldn’t stop it. He had to keep faith.
“You don’t understand,” Gabriel snapped. “I saw you die. I was on my knees beside you, your blood on my hands. I felt you take your last breath. I felt—your mind extinguished and gone dark. There was nothing inside you, just this awful emptiness. You were gone.”
He sounded like he was standing on a cliff, the edge crumbling beneath his feet.
“You know I understand. I’ve known since day one you were going to end up in a grave if I couldn’t save you.
I’ve been living with this for weeks now.
” And it was supposed to be his burden to bear alone.
He’d never wished it on Gabriel. “I’m willing to carry that weight and fight if it means saving you.
But you want to call it quits and run away. ”
“That’s not fair.”
“It’s true.”
“It’s different for you.” Gabriel’s face was bloodless, so pale he almost blended in with the white wall behind him. “You’re better than me. Braver. When you told me you would change the future and wouldn’t let me die, I believed you. But I don’t believe in myself. I’m not like you.”
His words slid between Miles’s ribs, razor-sharp. He knew Gabriel thought he was speaking the truth. That he wasn’t brave, wasn’t worthy, wasn’t good.
“I know you. You’re not going to let me die because you’re scared. I believe in that, in you, more than anything.” Had anyone ever told Gabriel they believed in him before? “That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? Trying to find a way to save me?”
Gabriel’s shoulders slumped. “I was going to tell you once I found a solution, so you didn’t have to be afraid. I needed you to stay away from me and safe until I knew how to fix it.”
This conversation was giving Miles serious déjà vu. “You said that’s not how the future works. We can’t alter it by avoiding each other.”
“I changed my mind. Your optimism must finally be wearing off on me.”
Miles didn’t know if he should laugh or cry. “Well, I’m glad you’re feeling so positive, but we agreed we were in this together. You should’ve talked to me, explained what was going on so we could try to—”
“Try to what? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but our way hasn’t worked.
We’ve only made things worse.” Gabriel glanced around at the stacked boxes.
“Nadia’s family has a huge collection of magical items stored here.
If there’s something that can help us change the future and save your life, it’s in here. I just need to find it.”
“Emily told me what kind of items this place deals in. Interacting with dark magic is the last thing you should be doing.” Miles could still picture the black stain spreading hungrily across Gabriel’s skin, trying to swallow him whole.
“I’m fairly certain the last thing I should be doing is letting you die.” If Gabriel was aiming for humor, he missed it by a mile.
“This isn’t just about us,” Miles reminded him. “Bram’s counting on you to break this curse. He needs you.”
“You’re asking me to choose between killing you and dooming my brother.”
“I’m asking you to do what we’ve been doing this whole time: telling fate to go fuck itself and making our own future.”
That was the only way this could end—stopping the curse, the murderer, their deaths, this cycle of pain their families were caught in. All of it.
“It’s you and me,” he stated, repeating his promise from that night in the cemetery. “I’m with you as far as this goes, remember?”
Their gazes caught and held, the whole tumultuous sky in Gabriel’s eyes. Miles felt stripped bare, all his vulnerable insides exposed with nowhere to hide. He didn’t dare look away.
Gabriel let out a grim laugh. “Fine. You win. Let’s see this suicide mission through to the end, whatever that may be.”