22 the early bird catches the worm, and all that
22
the early bird catches the worm, and all that
Ava
Josie almost screams in shock when she finds me at the dining room table the next morning, hunched over my laptop and crunching loudly on the last of my toast, blinds still drawn to protect the sun-phobic demon I house within my body.
‘Holy Mother of God,’ she says, hand at her chest, the soft rollers in her hair and green silk pyjamas really heightening the whole Old Hollywood thing she’s got going on.
‘Nope, just me.’ I peer into my mug to find it empty.
‘At nine in the morning on a weekend. Who are you and what have you done with Ava?’ She approaches the table and shakes my shoulders roughly from behind. ‘Where have you taken her?’
‘Ha.’ I duck out of her grasp and push my chair back, peeling my bare legs from the wooden chair with a wince. ‘Tea?’
‘Always. Can you make one for Alina too? She’s in the shower.’
By the time she’s returned from taking Rudy out to the courtyard, the sound of the shower has just stopped and I’m adding milk to our mugs.
‘Are you going to explain why you’re up?’ She leans against the breakfast bar and eyes me suspiciously. ‘Wait, have you even gone to bed?’
‘I have in fact had a delightful night’s sleep. I got home way earlier than I expected.’
‘Proud of you.’ Josie leans on the counter and rests her chin on her linked hands. ‘Why’d you come home early?’
There Aiden was at the bar last night, too big for his stool in the way that my horny Neanderthal brain usually reacts to, but this time? Nothing. Not a flicker. Not even when he did that thing where he dragged my stool closer to him with his foot. Or when he laughed at every single one of my jokes. So, one drink later, when he asked if I wanted another, I did something I never do. I went home .
I reply, ‘Just wasn’t feeling it.’
‘And may I ask why you’ve decided to change a decades-long personality trait and have woken up early on a Saturday?’
‘I’m doing some work on my laptop and wanted to get it finished as soon as possible.’ It’s taken me a couple of hours to go through Finn’s presentation. If I help him with his pitch, hopefully he’ll get the job, he’ll leave as planned, and everything can go back to how it was before. ‘Speaking of which, do you know of a printing shop nearby?’
Alina sweeps into the room, short dark curls dripping on to her T-shirt as she kisses Josie on the head. ‘Morning. I didn’t expect to see you out of your hovel yet, Ava.’ I fake-smile at her and she snorts. ‘And sorry to eavesdrop, but I’ve used a printing shop down by Clapham North before. Or there’s the library?’
‘I think a shop’ll be better.’ I hand her a tea before picking up the other two, and we all make our way to the living area, Alina’s hand at the small of her girlfriend’s back.
They’re not one of those couples that falls all over each other at all times, but sometimes it feels like I’m intruding on the tiny moments they share – Alina moving something out of the way before Josie sits on it, Josie detangling Alina’s hair as they sit on the sofa listening to a podcast, the pair of them talking about art and music like it’s their religion.
‘Ava’s working on something mysterious,’ Josie explains, ‘on a Saturday.’
‘It’s not mysterious,’ I argue, curling into my spot on the right end of the sofa and pulling my massive T-shirt over me as far as it’ll go. ‘I’m helping Finn with something for a job interview.’
Alina’s eyebrows rise, and I can just tell Josie’s told her everything she knows about this man. ‘If he gets a new job, he won’t be around the coffee shop as much anymore, will he?’
I don’t know how to explain that he won’t be around the country as much anymore, but I still haven’t actually told Josie about the fact he was only ever going to be a temporary addition to my London life. ‘He’ll be stalking the coffee shop for a little while longer. It’s a long application process.’
‘Hm,’ Josie says. I can’t read what’s going on behind her eyes, but then she asks, ‘How’s your own job hunt going?’
‘Oh.’ My eyes water as I take a sip of too-hot tea. ‘It never really started.’
‘I thought you were going to apply to that internship Finn mentioned?’
Damn Josie and her impossible memory. ‘I didn’t get around to it before applications closed. And I’m not sure what else to try, so I’ll just stay at City Roast for now.’ My drink scalds my tongue at the same moment the image of me working there in twenty years sears across my brain again.
‘Come on, you hate that place.’
‘I don’t hate it. Not all of it, anyway.’
‘It’s not your passion,’ she says, momentarily distracted by Rudy nudging her hand with a toy in his mouth, which she tugs absent-mindedly.
‘Tell me, when have you ever known me to be passionate about anything?’ I pull my fingers through a knot in my ponytail. ‘I’m walking apathy.’
‘No you’re not. There’s more for you out there. You’re allowed to go and look for it, you know.’
I look over at the dining table, morning sunshine reflecting off the glass Finn took from Tamesis Dock. Would it be tempting fate to be a little brave in the hopes of being happy? Or would it be a disaster?
I make a non-committal noise and drink my tea.
‘Let’s go to the common today,’ Alina declares, now completely horizontal and soaking up the sun like a cat. ‘Ava, you’re coming too.’
‘I don’t want to get all hot and sticky and see all the bugs.’
‘Maybe the bugs don’t want to see you either,’ Josie argues.
‘That was mean.’
She shrugs. ‘You’re coming. And we can go to the printing shop on the way.’