Chapter Four #2
WE’RE SITTING AROUND the round table in the main hall. Well, they are sitting, I am pacing.
I can hardly breathe.
Ollie is sitting stiffly in a chair at the table, having rebuffed Lonan’s attempt to pull her into his lap at a chair near the fire, and refused Vale’s attempt to put an arm around her. Finn sits silently, holding her hand—the only contact she’ll allow.
She is using her other hand to drink deep of her second glass of wine. Both doors are barred. No one will interrupt this.
We wait. The four of us... we wait on our little Queen to be ready.
I continue to pace, trying to rid some of my energy.
Ollie places her wine glass down firmly as she takes a deep breath.
“I told you that my brother Alder imprisoned me.” Her voice is small.
We all nod, except Vale, who merely splits his time glaring at each of us in turn. He had shifted to fully human, wings gone, as we had entered the keep.
Oleander continues, “He took me at age sixteen. It was before I had hit puberty fully, but my powers had been clear. My control, was, as expected, incomplete. But one day, I awoke to screams. It was the middle of the night. My door was kicked in, and one of my maids was fighting with an intruder. A guard.” Ollie lets out a little chuckle.
“Fool I was, I thought it was a mistake. My brother, the king, had sent them to protect me and my maid didn’t understand.
He stabbed her and she slipped off his blade, to the floor, and he turned to me.
I started to scream. The next thing I remember, I was in a damp, dirty cell.
It was a few days before anyone came to see me.
The torch on the wall had long since burned out, so the light was shocking.
But my hunger was too great to try to hide.
As my eyes adjusted, and I heard the feet approach, I saw my brother.
Thank Goddess, this was all a mistake. He was tall, his skin a shade of pretty orange that I had always admired before this.
His flowing white hair was loose over his rich clothing.
But when he started to speak, my stomach turned over.
You see, he had killed my mother. Both my maids.
My tutor. Several of the main maids of the castle, the cook, the head groom, the grooms who managed my pony.
The mothers of my father’s three young sons, whom I doted upon.
The only one left alive who knew of me was my brother Lennox.
He was a kind brother, but often busy managing my father’s duties.
I often wonder if he noticed my absence at all.
Surely Alder just made up a lie to explain it. ”
Ollie’s voice breaks. She takes a deep drink of wine and continues.
“Alder threw a loaf of bread at me, and disappeared. The next two years, as best as I could tell, were about breaking my spirit. The minimum of food, of interaction, to keep me from losing my mind.” She shakes her head.
“I would have thought it couldn’t get worse.
But somewhere around my eighteenth birthday, something changed.
Ordained Rafe started to visit me. At first, I thought perhaps he would speak to my brother, speak well of me.
He was so kind in the beginning. But... it changed.
As he realized that my magic was manifesting more regularly, he made sure there were torches keeping the space lit.
He brought me to a shower room and offered me a bar of soap.
I cried. The luxury of cleaning myself was one I had nearly forgotten. ”
She sighs, her gaze inward, and I see her muscles tighten.
“He forced himself upon me the next day. The day after that, he strapped me to a table and took a piece of my flesh.”
Lo, Finn and I, all make furious noises but Ollie continues, almost trancelike, “He brought in another earth Fae, a man named Abel. They... took turns raping me regularly. They were worried my magic might manifest spontaneously, so they always beat me using... implements the day before one of them would rape me, to deplete my magic. The beatings caused my magic to spill from my skin, so a cold, brutal shower before I was held down and raped was normal. They would tie me up and cut pieces of skin from me to experiment upon. I learned they used a piece to kill my brother Lennox. It took weeks for him to die.”
Ollie chokes on a sob but we don’t move, aside from the small movements of Finn’s hand on her leg.
Ollie swipes at her eyes furtively. “When I was twenty-two or so, I had learned, on my own, to control my magic enough that I killed Abel while he raped me.” She grins coldly.
“That was the last time I was taken against my will.”
She shakes her head again as I grind my teeth, overwhelmed with rage.
“The next six or so years are a blur. The removal of my flesh continued. They also did experiments directly on me. My brother rarely ‘visited,’ the utter bitch.” Her tone drips with derision.
“Didn’t want to get his hands dirty, now that I was dangerous, I imagine. ”
“Perhaps three years into it, I got a new gaoler, a giant of a water Fae named Red. He took pity on me, showed me kindness. Brought me books. The occasional treat of honey cake, snuck from the kitchen. Made sure I could shower regularly. Brought me fresh blankets and supplies for my cycle.” She shakes herself.
“I killed him. It was years before my opportunity came, but since I had little else to occupy myself, I had plenty of escape plans. He came in my cell a few days after my cycle, to see if Ordained Rafe could torment me again. And he touched me, his bare hand to my forehead. My control of my magic was haphazard, burned awkwardly in my brain, but there nonetheless. I murdered him. I left his body in my cell and fled. Fled with nothing but the shift on my back and the coin I had dug from Red’s pockets, and his cloth bag that held his lunch. ”
I can take it no longer, as my incredible mate pauses. I stride across the room and tug her chair out. Whereas before this, I would have simply pulled her into my arms, Vale’s words, his accusation, hang in my mind. I plant my hands on the arms of Ollie’s chair, bringing my face to hers.
I whisper roughly, “Say I can touch you, baby.”
Her coral eyes are locked on mine, tears dripping, as she nods.
And swiftly, I take her in my arms. I hold her tightly and her legs wrap around my body, my one hand lowering to the top of her ass, holding her flush against my body as I struggle against the sobs that are threatening to escape my mouth. My mate. My baby. My poor girl.
I stand, arms around her as she holds me around the neck with a desperate strength. I try to breathe, to keep my anger from overwhelming me.
“Kai,” Lo calls and my eyes snap open, looking to him. I realize he’s warning me of my control. The room must be heating. I struggle to pull my magic back even as I bury my face in Ollie’s neck, her soft white waves pinned between us.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper into her ear. “I would have never... never...”
Her head snaps up, and she meets my eyes. “Don’t you fucking dare, Kai.” Her anger is palpable.
“Feel sorry for my past, that’s fine. But don’t you dare to second guess our interactions.
Don’t you dare suggest you’d treat me differently because of what has happened to me.
You have never touched me without my enthusiastic, even if silent, consent.
So don’t you fucking dare.” She breathes hard.
“With you, I knew what I needed to say to make it stop. That was the fucking difference. You would have listened. It’s not the same.
” And she kisses me, her tongue forces its way into my mouth and I groan, holding her tightly.
“Don’t let go, Kai,” she whispers into my ear.
“I will never let you go, Oleander,” I murmur into her hair. I stand holding her tightly as the silence stretches.
“Then what, beloved?” Finn asks softly. I turn so I can see him.
“What?” I ask.
He looks chagrined. “The years don’t add up. There are several decades between your escape and now.”
I carry Ollie to one of the armchairs by the fireplace, incapable of putting her down right now, and sit with her on my lap.
She shifts but I glare. “You’re not going anywhere right now, princess. Finish your tale from here.” And I wrap an arm around her waist.
She sighs, but it’s not a frustrated one, it’s a comfortable one, and her body eases against mine.
Lonan, followed by Finn and Vale, come and sit in the other chairs as she speaks.
“I ran. I went east, knowing it was away from the nearest city of any size. I traveled at night and slept in fields and thickets during the day. I came to the forest. I was relieved at first but I soon found that fresh water in the forest wasn’t the easiest to come by.
One day, a small starling landed at my feet.
She hopped around, chirping angrily. I was too tired, too shocked to think about it properly—that she was probably a shifter.
But she wanted something so I followed her.
She brought me to a clean, dry cave near a clear-running stream.
” Ollie smiles, “It was perfect. Hard work, but I wasn’t afraid of that.
I made my home there for about two years.
Somewhere in that time, I had taken to visiting a nearby.
.. village is a strong word, but a cluster of homes with an open well and farmland.
I traded berries and useful leaves and roots for things like books and blankets.
Eventually, one of the older women convinced me to stay with her.
She was their healer, and she taught me even more herblore than I knew. ”
Ollie looks at Vale, one side of her mouth tilted up. “The starling visited regularly. I had lived with Oona, the healer, for a few years at that point, and one day.” A full grin. “A dragon showed up with the starling.”