16. Pearl Davis
16
Pearl Davis
I slump back in my chair as my last client and his mom exit my office. Another successful session. It always warms my heart when foster parents are proactive about therapy. It not only helps the kids process their emotions but also strengthens the bond between them and their guardians.
It’s a known fact that children in foster care who actively seek mental and emotional support, with the help of the system or their caregivers, are more likely to find a forever home.
I love my calling.
Sometimes, it’s hard to believe that this is my job. A Christian therapist once saved me when I was just thirteen years old, angry at the world for never knowing my parents.
When Beatrice first suggested therapy, I was ready to put up a fight. No one had ever asked me how I felt in all the homes I had been shuffled through. But Beatrice and Fynn were different. They never had children, yet they cared for me more than I ever imagined parents could. Without them, I might have aged out of the system and ended up on the streets, maybe with a child of my own. That’s what happened to many of my childhood friends who didn’t get the blessing I did—to be paired with a God-fearing couple who helped me untangle the mess of my young emotions with a professional therapist.
I continued seeing the same therapist regularly even in my early twenties. While I knew I had found complete healing when Jesus entered my heart, navigating early adulthood was a challenge, especially with Beatrice and Fynn no longer reachable as they had been called to serve the Lord in Cambodia. Our contact was limited to sporadic emails updating me on their missionary work. My therapist became the only other person who truly knew me and whom I could confide in—before I met Robyn. Most of our sessions in college revolved around my relationship struggles with guys.
I’ve always been the type of person who genuinely enjoys getting to know people, which has often landed me in unexpected relationships with a lot of guys. Unfortunately, those relationships never seemed to last. Either I compromised my values to date unbelievers, or I fell for guys who pretended to share my faith in Jesus only to reveal their true intentions later on—that was Clay, two years ago.
My past experiences have taught me all I need to know about guys like Zane. I believe God has someone special for me; He’s promised me a family, and even at twenty-eight and single, I still hold onto that hope. In the meantime, I just need to get better at dodging the wrong guys.
It doesn’t help that I have a tendency to fall for someone in a heartbeat, and making plans with Zane this Sunday feels like the wrong move for a girl like me.
I glance at my watch. It’s time to go home. Robyn and I have a girl’s night planned every Friday.
I tidy up my desk and organize the files, making sure the file on top is the one for my first appointment on Monday. My organizational skills are always at play. Everything has its place, and I thrive on systems and routines.
I turn off the lights and adjust the thermostat to a slightly chillier setting. It’s not the warmest March, but there’s no need to crank up the heat and risk a high utility bill.
Robyn and I are treating ourselves to our favorite dishes at Fiesta Grill . I got my usual enchiladas with two sides of rice and black beans, topped with my favorite toppings. Robyn, on the other hand, switches it up between quesadillas, tostadas, and chalupas. Today she went for the chalupa with the same sides as mine, but her toppings are a bit spicier than mine. I prefer to keep it on the milder side.
The queso at Fiesta Grill is incredible—the kind that seems designed to spoil your appetite. We always end up taking some home because they serve so much! We love using it later with chips at home, although our chips aren’t quite as perfectly salted as the ones here .
“So, why are you keeping me waiting? I’m dying to hear what happened at the cafe,” Robyn prods eagerly, taking a bite of her food.
“First of all, I need you to be my best friend and not Zane’s fan when I tell you this.”
“I’ve always been both, but I’ll try,” she says, putting on a serious face.
I can only hope Robyn sees the danger in all this and brings me back to my senses instead of fangirling about some hockey player and our supposed friendship.
“We met again at Randy’s today, although this time he didn’t make it sound like it was an accident. He apparently wanted to run into me.”
“What? He said that?” She starts screaming and fanning herself with a napkin.
“Robs, focus, we already talked about this. I’ve been burned too many times with worldly guys. I can’t let Zane even be an option in my mind.”
“True, you’ve been in an awful lot of bad relationships.” She takes another bite of her chalupa.
Not the reminder I needed right now, but at least she’s focused.
“Right. So he mentioned needing someone to talk to, and you know how I am. I’ve seen how not having anyone to talk to can lead to depression first-hand. We sat for coffee, and he opened up about a few hockey-related issues he’s dealing with.”
“ Ugh , lucky you,” she interrupts, slamming her hand on the table hard enough to make the water in her glass ripple. “I would have loved to be at that table. His last game ended with him in the penalty box again,” she adds with a touch of sadness in her tone.
I purposefully didn’t tell Robyn that I had watched the game at Kate’s, mainly because I was only interested in catching glimpses of Zane whenever the camera was on him. The last thing I want is for her to insist on going to a game with me in person.
I’d be caught red-handed, and I’ve kept my attraction to him a secret from her. It’s information I’ve deemed irrelevant.
“Not where I’m going with this.” I give her a glare.
“Okay.” She beckons with her hand, urging me to spill it already.
“So I saw Duke and Kate coming to the café from where we were sitting, and I tried to make a quick escape, but Zane delayed me, asking if we could get together again. I really don’t remember what I told him because I was panicking. I can’t explain why seeing Kate with Duke still makes me feel weird. I know I no longer have a crush on Duke, but I just didn’t want to be seen with a guy. You know how rumors can be. Anyway, I couldn’t exit in time, and we got to the door at the same time. Kate was happy to see me, and when she invited me to her engagement party on Sunday, I lied about having plans.”
“Why did you lie? You hate lies.” Robs’ eyes widen with concern.
“I know God does too. I’m not proud of it. But that’s not all.” I skip the part where Kate belittled me about never having plans. Robyn is intense and can’t stand anyone being mean to me; that would be the thread that breaks the camel’s back in her already-distant relationship with Kate.
“Go on.”
“So when I lied, she obviously didn’t believe me. It’s no secret I don’t have much of a life outside work, church, and, well, you. Then Zane came up behind me and blurted out that we had plans together on Sunday.”
“Wait, he was listening to your conversation?”
“You know Kate’s voice. She doesn’t need a mic to be heard. But I had no idea he was eavesdropping too.”
“How did I miss this epic movie?” She runs her hand across her face.
“It was embarrassing at best,” I say, rolling my eyes.
“But he saved you, didn’t he?”
“He did, but now he wants us to follow through with the Sunday plans.”
She smirks. “It’d be two lies if you didn’t.”
“Ugh, he said the same exact thing. But do you really think I should go out with Zane? I mean, me, Pearl Davis, the girl you’ve labeled as being boy crazy,” I say pointing both index fingers to myself.
“It doesn’t have to look like a date,” she says, and I furrow my brows, not understanding her point. “I won’t say no to tagging along if you ask nicely.” She shrugs.
My heart races. Why didn’t I think of this? “Are you serious? Would you come with me? I really need you to make sure I don’t get attached to him,” I say, biting the inside of my cheek to suppress any words that might reveal my growing attraction to him .
“Girl, yeah! I have so many questions about this season. I’d love to come. Just make sure you ask him first. Despite him being in your face all the time, he is a celebrity and needs privacy.”
She’s right. I really don’t see Zane as a celebrity. He’s not exactly subtle for someone supposedly famous. I mean, stalking someone like me in a coffee shop?
He also doesn’t know how to blend in. If it wasn’t for my advice, he’d probably show up next time wearing neon colors. That thought makes me smile. I’m glad Robyn’s looking down at her phone.
“I’ll ask him.”
“You have his number too?” she asks, surprised.
“No, he took mine to coordinate,” I say, swatting her for looking at me suspiciously.
“You are living so many girls’ dreams and you don’t even know it.”
“Robs, is this your dream? Do you want to date Zane?” I know Robyn doesn’t date, but what if all this is rubbing in her face something she’d want for herself? I’d hate for it to be the case, and I’d do anything to cut off Zane for this reason.
“Relax. I don’t date, and I absolutely would not date someone I’m a huge fan of. So trust me, I’m only saying that because I am on social media and I see how girls rave about Zane Ortiz.”
I sigh in relief, unsure if it’s because I’m glad I don’t have to cut off Zane immediately—though I know I’ll still need to if I want to avoid another disappointment or, worse, getting hurt.