24. Zane Ortiz
24
Zane Ortiz
It’s just me and Tyler left in the gym. With everyone else having gone home after our lifting session, I seize the chance to ask him to stick around and join me on the stationary bike.
I’ve been wanting to pick his brain about my recent thoughts, but I haven’t found the perfect moment to broach the subject. Every time I’ve tried to bring it up, someone has interrupted us during our workout.
“What did you want to ask earlier?” Tyler asks, pedaling slowly. The goal isn’t to raise our heart rates, that’s for sure.
A feeling of timidity floods over me for a few seconds, but I remind myself that Tyler is the best person to ask about this. He’s been a friend when I wanted to know nothing about his faith, and he’ll walk me through my roadblocks without judgment.
“I don’t understand why God became a man to come to this world to die for our sins. Couldn’t he have maybe come to eradicate all the suffering instead?” I finally say, feeling a bit vulnerable.
A curve forms on Tyler’s mouth, his smile lines betraying the few years he has on us. “I know suffering seems like the world’s worst problem to us. But not to God. Sin is his biggest concern. It’s what brought suffering into the world back in Eden, and it’s what continues to perpetuate it. Sin is the one thing that separates God from human beings because He can’t coexist with it. That’s why He sent Adam and Eve out of Eden. After creating them and seeing that it was good, it must have broken His heart not to have a relationship with them. The only way to bridge that gap was through the sacrifice Jesus made on Calvary.”
I blink twice, trying to absorb this new information.
Dying for a relationship with us?
“What does a relationship with God actually mean?”
Tyler leans back slightly. “It means that after believing that Jesus is your Lord and Savior—acknowledging that He died for your sins—you can have fellowship with God,” he explains thoughtfully.
I widen my eyes. “In layman’s terms, please.”
“When you have a relationship with God, He is with you all the time.” He clears his throat. “When you’re suffering, He’s there to comfort and ease your pain, granting you peace amid life’s storms. When doubt creeps in, He strengthens your faith. When you’re lost, He guides you. You never have to face anything alone when you have a relationship with God.”
I feel a lump form in my throat as I’m about to share a piece of my pain with him. “Sometimes, I feel like no one can comfort the suffering I’ve endured. Never knowing my mom, and feeling responsible for her death in some way... It’s a burden no one I’ve ever met can understand. No one knows what it’s like to walk that path. It’s made me question if this life is worth...” I trail off, noticing his expression softening. “It didn’t help that I grew up with a dad who liked to remind me of the pain I brought into this world when I was born.”
Tyler extends his hand to rest on my shoulder. “I’m sorry. I can’t even begin to imagine how hard it’s been for you all these years. And I understand wanting someone else to fully understand your pain, but that doesn’t guarantee healing. Only Jesus heals.” He continues. “The Bible calls Him a man acquainted with sorrow. He faced suffering of all kinds, and I know for sure grief was one of them, having lost His earthly father and later a close friend whom He resurrected.”
He then dismounts from the bike, reaches into his pocket for his phone, and continues. “There’s a Bible verse my family and I always turn to in hard and painful seasons that reminds us to go to Jesus. It’s from Hebrews 4:15-16: ‘ For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things just as we are, yet without sin. Therefore let’s approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace for help at the time of our need .’”
I’m amazed at how Tyler and Pearl have these Bible verses memorized. The Bible seems like a dense book and full of history, but when I hear these quotes, they’re exactly what I need at that precise moment .
“Thanks for sharing that,” I say. “Do you really think anyone can have a relationship with God? I mean, I’ve been unkind to people who didn’t deserve it—all in the name of trying to get even with the hand I’ve been dealt. I’ve pushed away people in my life who tried to care. Do you think I deserve this Christian life too?”
Tyler shakes his head, “You don’t deserve it, but neither do I. Nobody deserves the love God showed us on Calvary. He had His son suffer in our place. What we all deserved was to be on that cross. And I’m grateful God doesn’t give us what we deserve; that’s why salvation is a gift. We can’t earn His love, so neither of us can boast about doing something right.”
“How do I start this relationship with God?” I ask.
“You ask Him to come into your heart as soon as you believe in what He did. When you truly believe and invite Him in, He will come into your life. Then, you’ll need to exercise faith to believe it—it’s a continuous process of trusting and relying on Him. Building a relationship with God happens when you engage with His Word; it’s the primary way to know His nature and His will for us.
“When you receive the Holy Spirit, the Bible becomes alive and relevant, revealing more about Jesus Christ, whom we strive to emulate. As you grow closer to Him, you’ll naturally desire to avoid actions that would hurt Him—not out of fear of punishment, but out of genuine love and reverence. When you get a glimpse of God’s love for you, you’ll not want to spend this life or eternity without your Creator and lover of your soul.”
Whoa , my mind just expanded with this conversation .
If starting a relationship with Jesus is this straightforward, I should’ve taken notes when Tyler was talking. He really said some interesting things. I hope I don’t forget any of it.
“I have to ask, bro. What’s with all these questions all of a sudden?” I’ve also stopped pedaling.
“I went to church once, and I’ve been replaying the sermon the pastor preached in my mind since that day,” I reply, leaving out some important details.
“Why didn’t you tell me you’ve been going to church? And what changed your mind? I’ve been inviting you for ages, and just when I’d given up, you finally give it a try. I mean, I’m happy but also super convicted that I stopped asking.”
“No, I’m glad you stopped asking. I don’t think I was ever going to change my mind,” I pause, deciding to let it all spill out. “I met this girl. She invited me to church, and I honestly went just to see her since she didn’t want to hang out with me. Well, I guess you’d say God used my interest in a girl to show me He’s interested in me too.”
“Who is this girl, and more importantly, why haven’t we met her yet?” he says, hands up in the air as if I said I was dating her or something. He’s going to be disappointed.
“Never mind who she is. She wants zero to do with me,” I reply, making a zero sign with my hands to emphasize her complete disinterest. “For a while, I thought we were becoming friends and had some hope, but she’s completely ghosted me. I guess I’m really not her type.” It had been a few days since Pearl sent me a message about the counselor she’d found for me, which was great. I’d met him briefly on a video call, but I missed Pearl so much. I tried to call, text, but she wasn’t replying, and the message was clear.
I thought having her at my house and just hanging out with her, not pulling out overtly flirty moves, at least as best as I could, would help her trust that I wasn’t just physically attracted to her. But I guess there wasn’t any way for her to trust someone like me.
I was a fool for getting my hopes up when I discovered she wasn’t a fan of hockey, thinking maybe she’d appreciate me for who I am. Yet, now it’s clear there’s nothing about me to admire, except my skills on the ice and the way I handle the puck. Apart from that, I’m just an empty canvas.
It’s time to cut my losses and give her the space she strongly desires.
I need to focus on finding my own path to fulfillment, much like Tyler, Carson, and even Coach seem to have found in their relationship with God through Jesus.
Tonight, I’ll say the prayer. I’ll ask Jesus to come into my life. I need to finally know what it’s like to have a good Father.
The semi-final game is a fierce battle, with our opponent proving to be a tough challenge. Sticks clash, the crowd roars, and the pressure mounts with every passing second. I’m being closed in from all sides, struggling to break free for even a moment.
I scan the stands for encouragement, hoping to find fans in my jersey. Maybe seeing them will remind me that I can score two more goals to win this game. But then, amidst the sea of faces, one catches my eye.
No, it can’t be her.
Pearl would never be at a hockey game.
She hates hockey.
She hates sports.
She hates me.
Well, maybe hate is a strong word for a Christian. She definitely doesn’t like me.
That can’t be her at my game, in my jersey.
But there can’t be another face as beautiful as hers on this planet. That’s the face that always takes my breath away. It’s the one I hate to have gone so many days without seeing.
A quick glance to her right confirms that it is indeed her with Robyn and the jersey she’s wearing is the one I gave Robyn.
Out of nowhere, a surge of energy courses through me, invigorating my limbs and sharpening my focus. The weight of the game falls away and is replaced by a newfound desire to win, fueled by the sight of Pearl.
If this is what it feels like to play with someone you’re a fan of, cheering for you, I’ll give Robyn whatever she wants to make sure Pearl comes to the final game.
I charge forward, dodging opponents with emerging agility. Hunter receives the puck, passing quickly to Fabrice, who redirects it to Trent. Tyler and I skate ahead, seizing the momentum .
When the play shifts in our favor, I see my opportunity.
I take the shot, the puck sails through the air toward the goal, and in that moment, everything slows down. The crowd holds its breath as the puck hits the net.
Goal!