Chapter 48 Love in the Chaos
~Felicity~
The funeral was smaller than I’d expected.
The funeral home had done exactly what Sandy promised—treated the family with dignity while keeping things simple.
The wake had been modest, with soft lighting and flowers that Macy had helped choose earlier in the week—white roses and wildflowers, beautiful and colorful.
Brad and his family sat in the front row to the right while Macy sat between Caden and me in the opposite row.
As we sat, Macy's small hand gripped her dad’s tightly while the minister spoke about Jessica’s life before the illness took hold, before the addiction and all the changes.
Macy wore the black dress we’d bought together yesterday, paired with the pearl necklace that had belonged to Jessica’s grandmother—one of the few family heirlooms Jessica had kept.
The service was brief, and sad. I looked around and realized how small Jessica’s world had become.
In addition to us, Caden’s family and mine were here—including everyone from the Barrett side and the Doyle side.
But for those representing Jessica specifically, there were just a few coworkers, and friends. Most came and left soon after.
The minister held the service and then Brad spoke for a few minutes, and that was it. No fun stories, no eulogies, just quiet.
After the service, we made our way to the cemetery for the burial. It was a gray day, overcast but not raining, which felt appropriate somehow. Macy was too afraid to approach the casket alone. She asked me to come with her. When I bent down, Lucas reached for her hand and said, “I’ll go with you.”
Funny how little moments can really change your outlook. In that moment, Lucas looked strong though he was just six. Macy looked down at him and his hand. Something shifted inside of her, like a realization that if Lucas could be strong, so could she.
So, the two of them approached the casket where it stood in front of her. She reached a hand toward it and placed a rose on top. Lucas leaned into her on her other side, holding her hand close to himself and leaning his head on her arm, not quite reaching her shoulder height.
Lucas looked up at Macy, as if she ruled the world.
Macy looked down at Lucas as if she had a purpose—to care for something more than her own pain.
It was beautiful to see this friendship become stronger than it had.
I could already tell that, while Lucas had a childhood crush right now, this could be the start of a true friendship—despite the age difference.
Back at our house afterward, Sandy and Cash had somehow managed to transform our home into what looked like a restaurant buffet. The dining room table was completely covered with casseroles, sandwich platters, salads, and desserts. Who did they think was coming? There wasn’t anyone at the funeral!
“I didn’t realize your mother was going to organize all of this,” I murmured to Caden as we watched Sandy direct traffic in our kitchen like a general commanding troops.
“Years of practice,” he said. “She’s been the unofficial coordinator for every family crisis since I was a kid. Death, divorce, job loss—Mom shows up with food and hugs.”
I approached her—with caution, “Sandy, I don’t know if this food will all get eaten. There wasn’t this many people at the funeral.”
“Oh, don’t be silly, Felicity. The whole family will come over to be here for Macy.”
“The whole family?”
“Oh sure. You know, everyone—those who could make it to the funeral and the rest of Caden’s cousins, aunts, uncles, and the like. All coming to be here with Macy now that we’re in a place she can let loose and be with her loved ones."
“Oh.” I was kind of dazed by it all. I hadn’t expected anyone else to come in.
It’s been a while since I’ve seen Caden’s full family—usually it was the cousins he would hang out with for Sunday football and such, but having everyone here at once, that was usually reserved for holidays or events once a year or so.
But I guess this counted as an event? Sandy is one of six and Peter one of six or seven, I think.
Regardless, they both have really big families.
It’s a wonder they only had two themselves—Caden and Cash.
As I was standing there, I heard the front door open and voices soon after.
“I told you to park on the street!”
“What does it matter! The driveway is a fine place for parking.”
“It is if you are actually on the driveway, Danny!”
“It’s only a small section of grass, Tommy. Shut up.”
I looked at Caden with raised eyebrows. “So, everybody?”
“Not everybody!” Sandy called from the kitchen, not even turning around from where she was orchestrating the food situation, “Just my brother Tom and his crew. Probably my sister Gladys and hers, and maybe Billy—he wasn’t sure if they’d all make it but said some of them would try.
Chris and Jimmy won’t be here with their broods though—too much going on.
That’s okay though, with everyone we have showing up, it’ll be a wonder if we get any leftovers! ”
Before I could respond, Patty Doyle’s voice filled the house, loud enough to also be heard from the kitchen too—so glad for that open floor plan... “Sandy, where the hell do I put this lasagna? This kitchen looks like it’s been hit by a food tornado!”
“Patricia Anne!” Sandy shot back immediately, spatula in hand. “Watch your language in front of the children!”
I smiled despite everything. Some things never changed—Sandy and her sister-in-law, Patty, had been bickering like this for as long as I’d known them, but they could organize a small army if needed.
Tom appeared in the doorway behind his wife, carrying what looked like enough beer to stock a small pub.
“Sorry for the loud invasion, Felicity,” he said, giving me a quick hug.
“We tried to leave the kids at home, but they weren’t having it.
Turns out, you stop having any say-so when your kids become adults.
” He shook his head when he said it, as if he was disappointed, but the smile on his face belied his words.
Behind him came the parade of people he was referring to—Tommy with Rachel and their kids, the twins Mike and Joey carrying coolers. Coolers? Why in the hell do they have coolers? Then came Danny. The house instantly filled with the chaos of a Doyle family gathering.
“Macy!” Danny called out, spotting her in the living room. “Come here and give your favorite uncle a hug!”
“You’re still not my uncle,” Macy said, but she was smiling as she walked over to him. I remember when she was younger, she would run to him. I don’t know if it’s time, or the circumstances, but she seemed so much more withdrawn from the little girl she used to be.
“I keep telling ya! I’m your dad’s cousin, which makes me your Cuncle—practically the same thing,” Danny said, scooping her up in a bear hug.
“Besides, I brought you something.” From his jacket pocket, he produced a mid-size, wrapped package.
“Made this for you. Nothing fancy, but I thought you might like it.”
Macy unwrapped it carefully, revealing a small wooden box, about seven or eight inches wide by four or five long, with her name carved into the lid. “It’s beautiful,” she said softly.
“It’s for keeping special things. Memories, pictures, stuff like that.
” Danny’s voice was unusually gentle. “Sometimes when we lose someone we love, it helps to have a special place to keep the good memories safe. Tommy stained it and did the engraving.” At this, Macy ran her fingers over the engraving of her name, clearly in awe of the handiwork.
“Thank you,” she said in a hushed voice, “I’ll put Mom’s necklace in here.”
“You can put whatever you want in there, kiddo. It’s yours.”
“Aunt Felicity,” Samantha, Tommy’s daughter, appeared at my elbow. “Dad said we should ask before we set stuff up in the backyard. Can I put some games up? Like cornhole and stuff?”
“Of course, sweetheart. Whatever you need.”
Within the hour, our quiet, grief-heavy house had been transformed.
The Doyle energy was like a force of nature—loud, warm, and completely overwhelming in the best possible way.
Kids were running between rooms, adults were debating the proper way to heat so much food at once, and someone had started a card game at the kitchen table.
Brad had come in a few minutes ago and seemed to be blending in, though he appeared to be quiet and reserved, unsure of what to make of all the crazy around him in the midst of his mourning.
I found myself standing in the middle of it all, watching Macy move from group to group, being passed from cousin to cousin, each one making sure she felt included and loved. This was what she’d needed—family, love, fun—a reminder that she was part of something bigger than her grief.
“You doing okay?” Maliyah appeared beside me, shoulder bumping me.
“Yeah, I am.” I nodded my head toward where Macy was helping Tommy’s wife Rachel arrange sandwiches on a platter. “Look at her.”
“The Doyle effect,” Maliyah said with a smile. “They don’t know how to do anything quietly, but they sure know how to be there for one another.”
The front door opened again, and I heard a woman’s voice calling out, “Sorry I’m late! Had to drive around the block three times to find parking with all these cars!”
“Andi!” Macy called out, apparently having already met her at some previous family gathering.
Andi Doyle, Caden’s other cousin, appeared in the living room doorway, wild curly hair escaping from what had probably started as a neat ponytail, carrying what appeared to be to-go boxes of coffee.
She took one look at the scene—kids everywhere, adults passing plates of food, conversations happening all around—and grinned.
“Well, this looks about right for a Doyle family crisis response,” she said. “Who needs caffeine?”
“Everyone,” Danny called out from the kitchen. “Especially if we’re going to keep up with this chaos all day.”
“On it.” Andi made her way toward the kitchen, stopping to ruffle Macy’s hair as she passed.
“How you holding up, sweetheart?”
“Better now,” Macy said, and I could see she meant it.
The doorbell rang, cutting through the comfortable chaos. Mike, being closest to the door, went to answer it.
“Uh, Caden?” he called out, his tone shifting. “You might want to come out here.”
The noise in the kitchen died down. Caden appeared in the living room doorway, curiosity written all over his face.
“What is it?” he asked.
Detective Morrison stepped into view behind Mike, looking somewhat shell-shocked as he surveyed the scene—kids everywhere, adults passing plates of food, the kind of organized chaos many never see in their lives.
“Detective Morrison,” Caden said, immediately alert. “What’s going on?”
"It is. I just came to pay my respects."
Relief flooded Caden's face, I don't think either of us could take any surprises at this point. "Please, come in."
With Morrison entering, he made his way around, fitting in well with the family. Turns out, Caden's cousin Danny already knew him since Danny works for the Boston Fire Department.
I approached him with a plate from the kitchen, "I thought I'd make you a plate."
"Thanks, I'm actually starving."
My sister joined us and I introduced them. "Morrison, meet my sister Maliyah. Maliyah, this is Detective Morrison."
"Reed," he said as he reached out to shake her hand. "You can call me Reed." I could swear his cheeks pinked up when he looked at her.
As soon as she placed her hand in his, I could see interest spark in her eyes and a shy smile tip up the corners of her mouth.
Oh boy.