Chapter 57
Fifty-seven
Ihold the moonstone to my chest as a laugh escapes me.
Although emotionally depleted, I feel stronger than ever.
There is beauty in self-acceptance, and I bask in the feeling.
A sharp cry pulls me out of my triumph. “Lenny, no!” Aria exclaims. My bubbling jubilation deflates as I turn, looking for my friend.
Lenny falls to his knees, grasping his chest. The mirror in front of him sits shattered, a jet-black darkness dissipating from its center.
“Lenny!” I run across the center of the arena, crossing to him like I did the first time I laid eyes on him months ago.
Please be okay, please be okay. It’s bittersweet how quickly someone can become so important to you.
“Aria, what happened!” I yell as I sprint, my legs taking me as fast as the wind can carry me.
Celeste deserts her twin, breaking into a run beside me.
The remaining competitors abandon their task, turning their attention to the emergency at hand.
“He stabbed the mirror,” Aria weeps, sitting next to Lenny.
I come to a skidding stop, dropping to my knees beside him.
“No,” a strangled sob escapes me. “No! Fuck!” I scream louder.
Shakily, my hands reach for Lenny’s wound.
Blood pours from a large puncture directly in the center of his chest. I apply pressure, screaming across the coliseum for anything, anyone, to help.
No healer arrives, no divine power to save him.
“Lenny, what did you do?” My voice wobbles.
Lenny’s skin is ashen, slick with sweat.
I look into his chocolate eyes, widened with fear.
He has the kindest eyes. I’m not ready to let them go.
“I’m sorry,” his voice shakes. “I didn’t know.
I couldn’t take it.” He didn’t realize. What happens to your shadow self happens to you. “Will… will you hold me?”
Hands trembling, I guide his head into my lap. Despair detonates within my chest, imploding my very being. “It’s okay! It’s okay, it’s okay.” I try to convince both him and myself, as the words become my mantra. “You’re going to be okay.”
“Zellie,” he tries to reach for my hand, his energy depleting.
I reach for him, taking his hand in mine and kissing it.
Aria cries beside me, Celeste kneeling behind her, holding her shoulders in support.
“You were the best sister I could have ever chosen. I love you.” A single tear escapes, rolling down his cheek.
“Lenny, please don’t leave me. You’re my brother; I need you. I love you.”
“You made me feel,” he stops, resting his eyes, “like I belonged.”
“Lenny, open your eyes.” Tears fall endlessly, dripping down onto his chest.
“Open your eyes, Len.” My voice is firmer, my hand holding onto his with more force.
“Lenny,” my voice cracks.
Aria wails as Lenny’s breathing slows, coming to a complete stop. “Lenny, no, please,” I beg, closing my eyes as sobs wrack my body.
“He’s gone, Zell,” Celeste whispers quietly.
Time has stopped, and I will never be the same.
I failed him.
I failed him.
I failed him.
The warning horn blares, as does the one signaling the end of the challenge.
Still, I remain by Lenny’s side, refusing to leave him.
I brush back his cropped hair, the yellow streaks moving with each stroke of my fingers.
If not for his injury and the blood drying across his torso, he would look peaceful.
His eyes are closed; his long lashes lie still.
He was only a child, with his entire life before him.
A potential love story that was blooming ended before it had even begun.
Friendships forged that deserved time to strengthen with memories made outside of this sick and twisted environment.
An icy numbness creeps slowly through my body, consuming me.
I am cold, unfeeling. Salty tears have dried on my cheeks, leaving stiff trails in their wake. I brush his hair again.
“Zellie, get up.” In a fog, I watch Lenny’s face. He could be sleeping.
I failed him.
“Zellie.” A cold, stern voice cuts through the mist like a knife. I blink, unmoving. “Get up, Zell, or they are going to disqualify you.”
I failed him.
“I don’t fucking care,” I roar, throwing every ounce of hatred and disgust into the words.
Tears trail mindlessly down my face. Blinking through them, I realize it’s Leo.
He’s kneeling next to me, cupping my cheek, his thumb gently swiping my tears away.
“I can’t leave him,” I whisper, my chin uncontrollably quivering.
In a soothing tone, Leo murmurs, “He’s gone, baby.”
I close my eyes, calling on every ounce of self-preservation that remains in my body.
Leaning forward, I press my lips to Lenny’s forehead.
“I’m so sorry. I love you, Len.” Once more, I take his hands in mine, holding them for what will be the last time.
“I’m sorry,” I repeat, placing his hands gently on his chest. “I will make them pay.” I stand unable to tear my eyes from his body.
“I will make them all pay.” I won’t stop until Pluto Lazar is fucking gone.
The arena is silent, so quiet that I can hear my breathing.
When I look up, orb lights flicker to life in the crowd.
At first, they light without form, but within moments, they take the shape of an eight-pointed star.
A sign that the Children of the Constellation are here, that I am not alone.
A symbol of perseverance, of hope not lost. Hope may not be lost, but I am.
I can’t decide whether the outward display against the Kosmos is foolish or brave—likely both.
Celeste joins the side opposite Leo. Miles joins her, as do Atlas, Merri, and Aria. A line of humans drawn in the sand. I slowly raise my head to meet Pluto’s beady eyes and the rest of the order lounging on their stupid fucking dais, sticking my index finger directly at the leader of the Kosmos.
You did this.
And I’m coming for you.