Chapter 32 Max #2
“I tried,” he said, and I felt Daisy’s ripple of shock.
“Before the rehearsal dinner, Scott and I argued. He said he couldn’t be with someone who was fine with hiding who I really was—who I really loved.
He told me…” His voice choked. “He asked if that was the example I wanted to set for my daughter.
“I went to my dad after dinner and told him I was going to call off the wedding. I thought of all people, or at least out of the two of them, he’d understand.
I told him how I felt—that I was gay. He responded…
” He let out a strained laugh. “He wasn’t unsupportive.
I guess I can give him that. But I guess I was hoping for a little more understanding than ‘I don’t give a shit who you fuck behind closed doors, but in public, you’re a McCormick, so you’re going to marry the girl you knocked up, and you’re going to continue this legacy, just like I have. ’”
“Did you tell him that you knew the truth?” I asked, a not-so-small part of me wishing I was crueler to the man I’d threatened earlier.
“No.” The sound he made then was the ragged groan of hope being buried alive.
“Even if I thought it would make any kind of difference, he didn’t give me the chance.
He said if I called off the wedding, he’d disown me, and without anything, Daisy…
with the pregnancy and the baby…I wouldn’t have been able to support you.
” He speared a hand through his hair. “I didn’t know what else to do.
I didn’t want to hurt you. You have to believe me.
You deserved better than this…than me. You deserved… the man who’d always wanted you.”
There wasn’t even a shadow of malice in his gaze as it steadied on me. He knew how I’d felt about her…just like he knew I’d never do anything to betray him.
“So you disappeared.” I wanted to blame him, be angry, but it was hard to.
“Maybe there were other options, Max, but at that moment, I was drowning in alcohol and fear that I was about to trap myself into a life of being someone I wasn’t, and I was going to take Daisy and the baby down with me.
So I disappeared.” His expression shuttered.
“I knew my parents would want to avoid a scandal, so they’d make up some excuse for me—for what happened.
In the meantime, you would’ve still had the house to move into and access to my credit card. ”
“Did you really think I’d use them after you left?” Daisy demanded, and Todd had the decency to flinch.
“No. I mean, if there were no other option, I knew you would, for the baby. But I knew it wouldn’t come to that,” he admitted, looking to me again. “I knew Max would never let it come to that.”
“So why come back now?”
Todd blew out a breath. “I wasn’t planning on it,” he admitted. “I thought it would be better—easier if I were just gone, especially after I learned from my mom’s ranting voicemail that you’d gotten married. I guess she thought that would provoke me to return or to at least reply. When I didn’t…”
“She approached me at the fundraiser.”
“I tried to make it in time, but my flight was delayed twice. By the time I landed early this morning, she’d left me another voicemail that they were going to ruin Max’s business and then fight for custody of the baby.
I came straight here to tell you everything and figure out a plan, but it sounds like I’m too late for that as well. ”
I tightened my teeth and nodded. “They won’t be coming after us anymore.”
Todd’s throat bobbed.
“I told him if they tried to make a claim for the baby, they’d have to submit to a DNA test, and I was pretty sure he wouldn’t want the results of that made public.”
He nodded again.
“I’m sorry,” I said roughly.
“Don’t be.” His expression was pained. “They…did this. I’m just glad you’re both okay—happy.” The hurt started to wash away.
“What are you going to do now?” Daisy asked, her voice soft.
“Go back to Providence with Scott. Finish my program. Heal.” A half-smile appeared on his face. “Figure out how to…be.”
Lucy let out a small whimper then, and all of us looked to the tiny human who tied us all together.
“One day I’d like to know her,” he said, giving a brief but slightly sad smile. “One day, when I know myself a little better.”
There was another knock at the door then, and Jennie popped her head inside. “I’m sorry to bug you again, but I have the birth certificate ready to fill out. It’ll just take two minutes.”
Daisy’s hand tightened, but I couldn’t look away from Todd.
“It’s no problem. I was just leaving anyway,” Todd said, and then, with a look to Daisy and me that spoke volumes, added with a poignant tenor, “Congratulations again. Lucy couldn’t have asked for better parents.”
There were a lot of things that were clear in what he said. His happiness for us. His relief that it had all worked out. And the subtle expectation that it was my name going on that birth certificate under father, not his.
Daisy and I shared a look, and then as soon as Jennie moved by me, I was out the door and calling for Todd.
He stopped just a few steps from the room, surprised to see me. It took me a beat once I caught up to him to figure out what I wanted to say.
“Are you okay?”
His head tipped, and then he smiled, and it was probably the easiest smile I’d seen from him in a long time that wasn’t alcohol induced. “I’m figuring out how to be okay, but in the meantime, I’m happy.”
I smiled back. “Good.”
“Sorry I never told you,” he repeated and let out a deep breath.
“I should have. It wasn’t you. I just…I knew you’d never let me continue being something I wasn’t, especially with Daisy, and I didn’t know what I was.
Who I was. I guess I just thought keeping it to myself would help me figure it out. ”
“To be fair, I never figured out how to tell you how I felt about Daisy.”
“True.” His chuckle sifted into silence. “I’m happy for you, Max. For both of you.” He extended his hand, but instead of shaking it, I took it and pulled him in for a hug. It was the only thing that felt right.
“I’m happy for you too,” I said. “If there’s anything I can do…anything with your parents.”
“Thanks, but I can handle them. Finally.” He smiled tightly and drew back. “Take care of Daisy and that beautiful little girl of yours.”
My chest strained. “Always.”
I watched him walk away until the end of the hall, and then he turned the corner, and I turned back to Daisy. To my daughter. To my future.