Chapter 16 #2
“Well,” I start, a smug grin starting to take over my face. “I am the Guardians’ Hero.”
“Oh, please,” she says with an eyeroll, pushing my face away from hers with an open palm. I hadn’t realized how close we got during the conversation, and I’m already missing it.
My stomach chooses that moment to growl with hunger.
We haven’t eaten anything all day. Only the coca leaves and ceremonial drinks still in our system kept us awake and moving.
I remember my constant hunger as a kid Mare’s age, and he’s only complained once.
The princess seems to read my thoughts because she goes back to the choclo and starts working it over the fire to warm up.
I go to the back and fetch Mare. He’s still half-asleep, but he fights against being picked up and insists on walking. The chumpi turned blanket drags behind him, and I feel like I should chide him to try to keep everything clean. Suyai would.
I look down at myself. My tunic is covered in dirt, front and back, from how the princess pushed me. I flush thinking about it again.
Who cares about some dirt?
We eat in relative silence. The princess and I share an unspoken desire not to disturb Mare out of his half-asleep daze. Once he’s done, I promptly guide him back to his sleeping spot, where he cuddles into the warmth with a smile on his face.
That is, until I start to leave.
“No,” he grumbles. “You have to stay.”
I hold in a laugh. He’s got a look of determination as if he’ll drag me back kicking and screaming.
“I’ll be in soon. I promise.”
“Why not now?”
Why not now? That’s a good question. I look over to the fire, where the princess sits chewing on some dried alpaca jerky. She looks mildly discontent at the flavor but swallows it anyway.
“Just a few minutes, Mare. I have to talk to the princess.”
“Oh, that’s good.” His eyes light up as he speaks. “Go now! What are you waiting for?”
The princess looks up at us when I yelp out a laugh at the insistent way Mare bats me away. I see where his priorities lie.
“Is everything okay with him?” she asks, and I hear genuine concern in her voice. It changes something in me, and I know we’re not going to fight this time.
“He’s okay. Are you okay?”
She sighs at my question. “I told you, I’m not getting my mimicry back-”
“No, not your mimicry. I meant, are you okay? You.”
Her head snaps up to stare at me. Her brows pinch together, and she looks more confused than I’ve ever seen her.
“Don’t you have more important questions you want to ask?”
I have a million questions, I don’t say, and go with a simple truth instead. “This is the most important one now.”
“You’re a fool if you think that.”
“I thought we already established I was. So, stop avoiding the question. Are you okay?”
She rolls her eyes. As soon as she smiles, it’s gone.
Her eyes go from amused to haunted as she thinks something through.
What I would’ve thought was a dead expression becomes so much more in the intimacy of firelight.
It becomes the look of a prey animal, a vulnerability that I was starting to recognize on her face again and again.
Just when I’m about to push her, she speaks.
“I want my mimicry back, but I can’t do it. I can’t do it,” she says, shaking her head and looking back down. It’s the first time I’ve ever heard her repeat herself. “I’m sorry, champion, but I can’t help you raise the island. I just can’t do it.”
“There has to be a way. How have you done it before?”
“I just told you I can’t!” she explodes, then winces. “I can’t do it, so you might as well drop me.”
“I’m not leaving you, mimicry or no mimicry. When will you get that Yanami?”
I hear the slightest hitch in her breath. Yanami. The firelight tricked me into an intimacy I have no right to, but it’s hard for me to regret my actions. She might pull away again or maybe…
She leans in.
“If you insist. Only if you really won’t leave me alone, then there might be a way.
I can’t guarantee it will work. My parents never believed so, but I have to try.
It’s not Lake Titicaca, but it’s on the way.
Four sacred lakes where I can commune with the Guardians. I’m going to go with or without you.”
It’s like the world opens before me. I’m no longer trapped and running. I’m in line with the fate I deserve for once.
“Stop looking at me like that, I swear to Pachamama,” she says.
“You swear to do what? Because include me in those plans too. Include me in all your plans because I promise I’m going with you,” I declare.
“You’re ridiculous.”
I jump forward and tackle her into a hug, and it must be her extensive training that has her make no noise except for a huff as she takes all my weight.
“I’m going with you, and then we’re going to Lake Titicaca,” I whisper into her shoulder.
“I haven’t agreed to that yet,” she stumbles through her words.
“It’s okay,” I say because I genuinely believe it is. “I’ll figure it out.”
I actually make her laugh. She wheezes into my shoulder, and I revel in the closeness.
I know in a few seconds we’re going to jump away from each other.
I know I’ve siphoned all the intimacy and quiet I can from tonight’s fire.
But for now, this is almost everything I want.
The princess wants to get her mimicry back, and I’m going with her.
If Suyai were here, it would be perfect.
But this must be destiny, the one that leads me to the Sun Staff and a fated battle.
I’m ready for it.