Chapter Adam #2
“He was quite seriously injured,” John says.
“His health declined after the incident, and possibly he developed epilepsy. The point is…” He smiles broadly, a little sheepishly.
“Nothing, really. It’s just a story, and I confess I don’t find any deeper meaning in it.
Except to note the irony in Rousseau, lauded as the precursor of all modern autobiographers, being happiest when he forgot who and where he was. ”
“Read the part again where he describes the feeling,” Ethan says.
“I felt throughout my whole being such a wonderful calm, that whenever I recall this feeling I can find nothing to compare with it in all the pleasures that stir our lives.”
“Peace,” Dane says. “He means peace.”
John raises eyebrows, pleased. “And what is peace?”
“The mission of the Danelaw.”
By now, Nomi has laid her head on her crossed forearms and dozed off. Ethan, though, is looking at Dane. His gaze goes far away, then comes back to stare hard.
“What?” Dane says, not wanting Ethan to stop looking at him like that, but morbidly curious why.
“Nothing, I was just thinking.”
Not too long after the Rousseau lesson, Dane finds a note on his pillow:
Do you remember the night we met? At the Montresor Gallery?
Your sister introduced me to Gideon Perfect and on the spot, he commissioned me to do the cover for his next album.
I don’t ever remember being terrified by a commission.
I’d never been the least bit nervous at making bespoke art for someone.
But this was Gideon Perfect. The chance of a lifetime.
I felt sick at the thought of screwing it up.
I was almost in full-on panic mode, considering changing my mind and telling him no, I wasn’t the one he wanted.
Then you walked out of the bathroom and straight into me.
Do you remember?
I was knocked over by a Great Dane, just like JJ Rousseau.
Just like him, I felt this wonderful calm.
It was instantaneous. I looked at your face and your eyes and all my panic and doubt and fear vanished.
It was you. Not just inspiration for the cover but you.
It was the Great Dane and the peace of the Danelaw.
It barreled into me and I forgot where and who I was.
I was knocked down, but I only knew peace.
I’ve known nothing to compare with it in all the pleasure that stirs my life.
The mission of the Danelaw is peace.
And I will go to war for your peace.
It is not lost on Danelaw Strong that the very first love letter of his life is sent by a boy.
When really fired up on a topic, John will pull out his massive whiteboard.
He paces to the bookshelves to browse, to the window to think, then back to the board to scribble.
Dane follows the circuitous path, sometimes writing things down, but mostly listening as John explores gender roles and identities in different cultures.
They discuss the Polynesians first, then Native American traditions.
The world’s indigenous peoples seem to have no trouble whatsoever eschewing a binary.
But Judaism, too, has some surprising game.
Six identities in all. John reads them out and Dane writes them on the board:
Saris: male at birth but develops female characteristics at puberty. Can be broken down into:
—Saris hamah, female characteristics develop naturally.
—Saris adam, female characteristics through human intervention.
“Human intervention, meaning what?” Dane asks.
John grimaces. “It’s a nice way of saying castration.”
“There’s no nice way to say that,” Ethan murmurs.
Ay’lout: female at birth but develops male characteristics at puberty.
—Ay’lout hamah, male characteristics naturally develop.
—Ay’lout adam, male characteristics through human intervention.
“So I’m saris hamah,” Dane says. “Born male and the female characteristics developed naturally. But then my father intervened and forced me back to male. Wait, does that make me a saris adam? Or an ay’lout adam?”
“Or an androgynos adam,” John says, jumping up for a book.
He finds the commentary of Rabbi Yirmeya ben Elazar: “Adam was first created with two faces, one male and the other female. These the Lord set back to back, as we read in Psalm 139:5—You have formed me behind and before, and laid your hand on me.”
“Adam was created androgynous,” Dane says slowly.
“Genesis 1:27,” John said. “So God created mankind in his image; in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.”
“Them,” Ethan says. “Adam’s pronouns were they/them.”
“God is they/them,” John says. “Elohim. Plural. Many gods. Genesis 1:26—God said, Let us make man in our image.”
Our image, Diane says, a little smugly. See? I told you.
“The first beings were hermaphrodites?” Dane asks, exhilarated and confused.
John’s eyes light up. “Now, that word has a backstory everyone gets wrong.”
He goes after another book, a beat-up tome of Greek myths. He tells his young charges that Hermaphroditus was the offspring of Hermes and Aphrodite. Salmacis, the water nymph, fell in love with Hermaphroditus. Wanting to be helpful, the gods made them into one androgynous male/female being.
“Many people think Hermaphroditus was the intersex being,” John says.
“No. Salmacis and Hermaphroditus were merged into an intersex being. But notice the female name Salmacis disappears and ever after, this new person is known only as Hermaphroditus? Or a hermaphrodite? The feminine name is completely absorbed.”
Like you and me, Diane says breathlessly. The gods made us, Dane. We were merged into one. I’m Salmacis—the absorbed female name.
Her awe fills the space behind Dane’s blue eye, then his brown one. His mind fills with understanding. He feels seen. Recognized, ordained and anointed. He feels historical. He cries and cries, because it’s all starting to make sense.
John has no idea what he’s done or how he’s just changed Dane’s life, but he hugs the boy tight, knowing an epiphany when he sees one.
“You are not outside the bounds of God’s image,” he says, rocking Dane against his chest. “Far from it. You are closest to God’s original creation. Adam androgynos. You were made in their image and they adore you.”
“You think…” Dane swallows a sob and tries again. “You think God loves me?”
John holds Dane away, a thumb roughly wiping tears away. “By whatever number and whatever name, God in their multitudes loves you.”
One day, many decades later, Dane will rescue an Australian Shepherd with one brown eye and one blue eye. He will name her Salmacis. Salma for short.