Chapter Nineteen
Summer in Seattle meant warm weather and long days. The lingering sunlight fooled me into thinking it was earlier than it was. By the time we finished our conversation, I was exhausted. A glance at the clock on the mantle told me why. It was well after midnight.
“I didn't get to eat my ice cream,” I murmured.
“What was that, Lo?” Rune asked.
“My ice cream,” I said. “I dropped it while I was running away from that man.”
Rune chuckled as Merrick rolled his eyes. Braxen just got up and left the room. I guess he was done dealing with me.
“We can go out for ice cream tomorrow,” Rune said. “You look tired.”
“I am,” I admitted. “Physically and emotionally.”
“Come on. Let's get you to bed.”
“We still haven't decided how this will work,” Merrick said.
“What do you mean?” Rune got up and held a hand out to me.
I took it and stood.
“You've had time to cement your relationship with her,” Merrick said. “Now it's our turn.”
I froze. I understood what being with them meant, but I had only just accepted it. “I need some time to process this first.”
“You can process as you get to know me.” Merrick stood up and stepped over to us. Holding Rune's stare, he took my wrist and drew my hand away from Rune.
Rune let go.
“Seriously?” I asked Rune. “So, I'm supposed to what—go to bed with him tonight?”
“No, of course not,” Rune said. “We're talking about you two getting to know each other. Sex isn't important. I mean, it is. I believe it will be very important to securing the bond, but it's not integral to our emotional bonding.”
“Let her go,” Braxen said.
All three of us looked toward the doorway where Braxen stood, holding a bowl of ice cream.
“I said, let her go, Merrick.” Braxen didn't raise his voice or put any menace into it, simply repeated himself. But it was enough to send a chill down my spine.
Merrick let me go.
“Come, Lora,” Braxen said.
I looked at Rune.
“It's your choice,” Rune said. “Everything that happens between the three of us and you will be your choice, done at your pace. None of us will ever hurt you or do anything to you that you don't want done.”
“I wasn't worried about that,” I said, looking at Merrick. “I just need to take this slow.”
“Lora,” Braxen said.
And that settled it. Braxen's voice did something to me. It vibrated on a level that spoke to my primal brain. I knew immediately that safety lay with him. And for me, safety meant a lot. I had to feel safe with a man before I could trust him. And I had to trust him before I could love him.
I went to Braxen.
The other two men stayed silent as Braxen escorted me down the hallway and into my guest room. Walking out of the heavy masculinity of the office had an immediate, uplifting effect on me. I breathed deeply as I looked around my new bedroom, inhaling the scent of fresh linen and lavender. The space was decorated in a clearly feminine style, with a canopied bed and a pale color palette of dusty rose and cream. An army of pillows guarded the bed and the couch that faced the bay window. Paintings of flowers spotted the walls. French furniture did the same to the floor. A chaise lounge posed at the foot of the bed.
As happy as I was to enter a softer space, I was also annoyed. “You must have a lot of female guests.”
“We've never had a guest,” Braxen went to the couch and sat down.
As if pulled in his wake, I followed and sat down beside him. He handed me the bowl.
“Thank you,” I said. I took a bite. “This is Tillamook banana split.”
He lifted his brows. “Yes.”
I grinned. “It's my favorite.”
Braxen smiled. “Mine too.”
As I may have mentioned, Braxen was stunningly beautiful. Man-beautiful. Women-weeping-beautiful. But when he smiled, he became real. He went from a piece of art displayed on a pedestal to a teddy bear sitting on a bed. From something too wondrous to risk touching to something that required cuddling. The transformation was so startling that I dropped my spoon.
His smile vanished as he looked away, a flush creeping up his neck.
“You should smile more,” I whispered. “You're too beautiful without it.”
Braxen's head jerked back my way. “What?”
“You must know how handsome you are. It's a bit intimidating. Your size makes you even more so. But when you smile, it softens things. Makes you more of a man, less of a god.”
“A god?” He lifted his brows. “I don't think so.”
“Braxen, you're more beautiful than Hermes.”
“What?” he asked again, this time in a whisper.
I shook my head. “You really don't know?”
Braxen frowned. “I'm just a brute.”
“You have the body of a brute, but the face of an angel. The thing is, angels are wondrous, but they are also unattainable. I'd rather have someone I can be comfortable around. Your smile makes me feel comfortable.”
He blinked. Frowned. Blinked some more. I went back to my ice cream and let him work through the complicated compliment. I had my own shit to process. So, we sat in silence, me eating and Braxen staring out the window. It wasn't awkward. On the contrary, it was comfortable, just as I said. I found myself leaning closer to him, my body going lax from exhaustion and food. As if we had sat so a thousand times before, Braxen slung his arm around my shoulders and pulled me in against his side.
Then he looked down at me and smiled.
I smiled back.
“Your smile doesn't make me comfortable,” Braxen said, startling me out of my languor.
“What?” I jerked away from him.
He chuckled softly and pulled me back into place. “It makes me the opposite, but in a good way. My heart races when you smile.”
“Oh,” I whispered. Then I leaned back and grimaced at him. “Cute joke.”
“I had to find my footing after you felled me.”
“Felled you?”
“Knocked me over with your compliments.” Braxen nudged my cheek with his nose. “I'm the one who's supposed to compliment you, not the other way around. But now, if I tell you how lovely you are, how I've never met a woman more beautiful than you, it will ring false or fall flat. I can't tell you how I couldn't breathe the first time I saw you. How I instantly hoped that Rune loved you so that we'd be forced to fight for you. You're a woman worth sacrificing for, Lora. I knew it instantly.”
I cleared my throat. “It's all right. You can still try to tell me all of that. I promise to believe you.”
Braxen chuckled and shook his head. “Now that I've met you, I know that your beauty is irrelevant. You don't just make my heart race, you also lighten it. And that's even more precious.”
I blinked, as thrown as Braxen had been. To be called beautiful was great. Who didn't like that? And Braxen certainly had a way with words. But to be told that I lighten his heart was soul-striking. I didn't feel as if I deserved it. What had I done to make him happy? I barely knew him. And yet, I felt it too. The rightness of him. What should have been insane, what I'd been calling insane, suddenly felt normal. Maybe it was magic.
That thought wasn't as lovely as it should have been.
“Do you think we feel this way because of Hades's spell?” I asked.
There went Braxen's smile, but it didn't turn into a frown. It became neutral. Pensive. “The spell is meant to draw our perfect mate to us. It does no more than that. What we feel is ours, Lomasi. It's real. I promise.” He leaned down and nuzzled my cheek, then whispered in my ear, “Does that mean I lighten your heart too?”
“Yes, of course,” I said without hesitation.
I felt Braxen grin against my ear. Then he nipped my earlobe. “I feel a lot for you.” He straightened and angled his head so we could look at each other. “Things I've never felt for anyone before. I want you.”
Braxen took my empty bowl and set it aside. With the same movement, he slid onto the floor before me. Holding my stare, he pushed my legs apart and eased between them. Broad palms coasted up my outer thighs, drawing my skirt up. Braxen leaned forward. I felt cocooned by him, ready for him to change me into a butterfly. And I knew he would. His body would do things to mine that would alter me forever. Maybe I'd even fly.
Hadn't I just balked at the possibility of having sex with Merrick? And yet, there I was, on the cusp of sleeping with Braxen. And it made perfect sense to me. To my libido, at least.
My breath caught when he pressed our chests together, his muscles flattening my breasts, then rubbing, teasing our nipples against each other. Hard little buds bursting with sensation. I groaned and spread my legs wider. It was a blatant invitation, and I knew I was going to fuck this man. All night, despite how tired I was. I decided.
Braxen braced his hands on the back of the couch and eased off me. He didn't leave, just gave us some space. He used that space to nuzzle my ear, then my throat. With light kisses, then flicks of his tongue, Braxen covered my neck, then made his way across my upper chest, grazing the tops of my breasts. I arched and tried to get him to go lower. Instead, he went up again.
Braxen whispered in my ear, “I want to fuck you, Lomasi. And I know you want it too. But this isn't about sex. I need you to see me first. See me as I see you.”
“I just told you how much I see,” I growled. “How many more compliments do you need?”
“That's just it. I don't mean my face. I want you to see past all that.”
“I said you lighten my heart.”
“I want to fill it too. Claim it.”
Braxen pushed back, putting his fists to the seat on either side of me. He looked like a gorilla about to pounce. Brutal. Terrifying. Beautiful. Wet and throbbing, I tried to squeeze my legs together to get some relief, but his body prevented that. I moaned and reached between my legs.
Braxen growled and bent to bite my wrist. I gaped down at him in shock. Had he really done that? Bit me? He rolled his eyes up to look at me, a warning in them. I nodded. He drew back, licking at the indents he'd left on my wrist before straightening.
“Tomorrow, I'll take you to the gallery. We can spend more time together. Until then, I want you wanting me.” He shot forward and claimed my mouth.
I grabbed at his shoulders, so turned on that I was ready to hold him in place with my nails and rub myself against the bulge in his pants if I had to. I knew it was too fast. Hadn't I said I wanted to take it slow? And yet, I couldn't stop myself. Braxen snarled into our kiss and grabbed my hips to shove me back. He nipped at my bottom lip in warning again, then slipped his tongue back into my mouth to lash at mine. Still, I fought for more, clawing at his back and arching into him.
Braxen grabbed my wrists and shoved them against the couch. He kissed me a few seconds longer, then pushed away from me, getting to his feet. It put my face in line with his crotch, and with his shirt disheveled from our kiss, I was able to see the top of his jeans. His cock peeked above it, the tip fully revealed, blushed pink and weeping. I moaned and leaned forward.
He jerked his shirt down. “Don't!” he said and backed away. “And don't touch yourself, Lora. I will know if you do, and I will be disappointed.”
With that, Braxen left the room. I watched him go, baffled that any man would walk away from sex. When the door clicked, it was like the snap of a hypnotist's fingers. I came back to myself with a jolt and gaped down at my rumpled clothes. Everything was skewed, my skirt hiked up, my top dragged down, and my legs spread wide.
“Holy shit,” I whispered and shuddered. “What am I doing? Fuck. I almost fucked him. Rune's brother. A man I barely know. I almost fucked him with Rune sleeping somewhere nearby. Fuck!” I rubbed a hand over my face. “Would he have been upset?” I thought about the way Rune had smiled when Braxen told him about our kiss. “Shit. He might have been thrilled.”
That realization turned things upside-down again. My sense of what was right and wrong got skewed. Between my legs was a serious ache, and as much as I was horrified to feel it, as much as I knew Rune was nearby and I should go to him to ease the ache, I couldn't stop myself from slipping my hand into my panties.
Rune couldn't help me with this. Braxen had brought me to the edge and only he could take me over. Well, him or my fantasy of him. I closed my eyes and imagined that things had gone differently. Braxen had pulled down my panties and lapped at my sex. Feasted with grunts and growls. His thick finger pumped into me, preparing me for his cock. He wouldn't even undress, just open his fly and shove himself into me. Join us with a single thrust.
I moaned as I imagined Braxen pumping wildly into me. My back arched, and I yanked my blouse open so I could massage my breasts. It was Braxen touching me. Braxen pinching my nipples. He'd suck hard on them. No mercy for his woman. Not when she needed to come. He'd hold me down when I trembled and keep fucking me through my orgasm. Rune was thrilling in bed. Strong and steady. But Braxen would be ruthless. He wouldn't ask what I needed, he'd simply know. And he would make sure I fucking got it.
Biting my lip to keep from crying out, I came. My body went into a violent spasm, everything shaking. The kind of blissful, ugly release you only get when no one was looking. When it was over, I felt a little ashamed but sated. I stood up on shaking legs and stumbled to the bed.
Braxen's words came back to me as I settled under the covers. “I will know, and I will be disappointed.”
I snorted. “How could he possibly know?”