Chapter 3
Chapter Three
‘Dan!’ Lucy opened her apartment door wide.
‘You sound surprised!’ Dan said, stepping past her into the apartment. ‘You summoned me, and so here I am.’
‘Yeah, but I didn’t expect to see you at this hour.’
‘What’s so special about the hour?’ he asked, heading straight for the kitchen and peering into the fridge.
‘It’s after six on a Friday night. The time most people are at home, eating, watching the news, wrangling kids — that kind of thing.’
‘I don’t have kids,’ he said, pulling out a half-finished bottle of wine and reaching for a glass.
‘Clearly. And neither do I. So… how are you?’
He glanced around, and Lucy watched him closely. Jen was right. Maybe because of everything that had happened to Jen, Lucy was more sensitive to changes now. She’d seen Dan so often over the years she hadn’t really noticed the difference creeping in. But now… he did look lost.
‘Yeah, great, thanks, Luce.’ He gave her a quick hug that felt oddly lacklustre.
‘What’ve you been up to?’
He shot her a sideways look, his gaze too perceptive. ‘Nothing much. So, this is why you want to see me?’
She ignored the question. ‘Everything OK?’
He sighed. ‘Who’s asking? You or Mum? Or Jen, come to that?’
She sighed back. ‘What gave me away?’
‘You. You’d be a hopeless spy. You always say what you think, and you’re so easy to read.’
She scowled. She didn’t like seeing herself that way.
‘Plus, you asked three questions in a row. You usually stick to one.’
‘Maybe I have no choice but to ask more than one. Because if I’m an open book, you’re so damned secretive no one knows what the hell is going on in your life.’
‘And that, dear sister, is exactly how I like it.’
‘I don’t believe you.’
She watched as he poured himself some wine and angled the bottle towards her glass.
‘No thanks,’ said Lucy. ‘I need a clear head.’
He inspected her. ‘You’re going out.’
‘I am,’ she said, stepping forward and resting her hands on his shoulders. ‘Don’t I get a proper hug?’
He sighed. ‘Sure.’
She gave him a big hug; he sat down on the sofa as soon as she’d released him. ‘Well done for submitting to it,’ she said wryly, more than a little puzzled by his lack of easy affection.
‘Hm.’ He grimaced. ‘Sorry. I’m out of practice.’
‘That’s no good.’ She took some cold chicken and salad from the fridge and plated it up, adding fresh bread she’d brought home from the café. ‘Here,’ she said, setting the plate on the coffee table beside him. ‘Eat before you drink any more.’
‘Thanks. I’m hungry.’
‘I thought you might be. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have turned up at my door just before dinner.’
‘Aren’t you eating?’
‘No, I’m eating out.’
He raised an eyebrow as he buttered a piece of bread. ‘Where?’
‘What are you, my keeper?’
‘I’m your big brother; same thing. So… big date?’
‘A date. Too early to tell if it’s big or not. Not enough information about him.’
He pulled out his phone. ‘I’ll do some digging if you like. What’s his name?’
‘Oliver,’ she said, checking her bag for keys, phone, lipstick — all the essentials.
Dan rolled his eyes. ‘Surname?’
‘Don’t know.’
‘You don’t know the full name of the person you’re meeting?’
‘I know he looks good, talks good, and he makes me feel good.’
Dan slid his phone back into his pocket. ‘Oh well, in that case, I guess you have all you need to know.’
‘I guess I do.’ She went to the mirror for one last check.
Dan walked up behind her, munching on salad. ‘You’re looking more than good. Hope he’s worth the trouble.’
‘Time will tell,’ she said with a smile, warmed by the compliment. In her heels, she didn’t even need to stretch to kiss his cheek. ‘I’m off. I want to call in on Mum before I go. Stay and finish your dinner.’
‘Cool.’ He looked around. ‘I think I will.’ He stepped out onto the small balcony that overlooked the village street, and Lucy joined him.
From up here, you could see the sea at the end of the street one way and the sharply rising escarpment at the other. Lucy loved it. Her work was two doors down, and her family were around the corner; everything she knew lay in between. She felt safe here.
‘You’ve got a nice place,’ he said.
She laughed. ‘You’re about the only member of my family who thinks so.’
He grunted thoughtfully before turning to her. ‘It’s like a retreat. One storey up, above it all. A place to escape.’
Lucy raked her fingers through her hair.
She knew Dan didn’t talk like this to anyone else, especially their mother.
She suspected she was the only one he let see behind the armour — probably because she was the least sympathetic and the most likely to be rude to him or laugh at him.
Sometimes it was easier to open up to someone who wouldn’t drown you in sympathy.
Even so, despite direct questions, he hadn’t really opened up since coming home.
She checked the clock. A few minutes late wouldn’t hurt.
‘And why, may I ask, do you need to retreat from the world?’
He didn’t answer. She wasn’t giving up. She didn’t know when she’d get another opening.
‘What happened, Dan?’
He turned his head. ‘About what?’
‘You. You left for the US confident, cocky, with the world at your feet. And you stayed like that for years. But now? You’re back, you look shell-shocked half the time, and you don’t seem in any hurry to return to your home and your job.’
He didn’t face her, just kept staring out to sea. ‘I’m not going back.’
‘You’re…?’
‘Not going back,’ he repeated. A gust of wind rattled the awning of the shop below, and he turned away from the railing. ‘Not yet, anyway.’ He rocked back on his heels as he looked around the apartment. ‘Thought I might hang around here for a few months and confuse my family.’
‘What about work?’
‘I quit.’
‘You quit your job in Washington? How come? I thought you loved being a lobbyist.’
‘I did. But now…’ He came back inside and closed the balcony doors firmly. ‘I don’t. So I left. Is that sufficient for you to pass on to the others?’
‘Are you kidding? No! I need more detail.’
He sighed, mouth tightening. She knew she was pushing it. ‘I couldn’t stand the double-dealing — the subterfuge, the secrets… the lies.’
‘Ha! And that’s just your personal life!’ Lucy waited for Dan to laugh with her. He didn’t.
Instead, he turned to her. ‘And that is definitely all you’re getting.’ He took a long swallow of wine. ‘Don’t worry, Luce. Everything’s fine.’
She grimaced.
‘Why don’t you believe me?’ he asked.
‘Because you’ve got a weird look about you. It’s like you’re going through the motions. Someone speaks, you answer, but you’re not really there.’
He huffed and closed his eyes briefly. The tiny flinch told her she’d hit the mark.
‘Are you depressed or something?’
His stillness answered more truthfully than words would have.
She reached out and put a hand on his arm. He spun around.
‘What happened, Dan?’
For a moment she thought she’d got through. Then he patted her hand and stood. ‘Nothing for you to worry about.’
‘That’s exactly the kind of thing that has me worried.’ She sighed. From his expression, it was going to take something like a pneumatic drill to get through the wall he’d built. ‘So, what are you going to do here?’
‘I’m thinking about it.’
‘Right.’ This definitely wasn’t like her go-getting big brother. ‘Well, I’ll let you eat in peace. Stay as long as you like.’
‘Thanks. I won’t be long. I’ll go and see Mum later before I go back to my flat.’
‘You could stay here if I had an extra bedroom.’
‘Lucy. You’re not fooling anyone. We all know the only reason you have one bedroom is because you don’t want to live with anyone. You’re too independent for that.’
She hadn’t realised she’d been so transparent.
‘Anyway, get going,’ he said. ‘And enjoy yourself.’
‘Right.’ She picked up her bag and walked to the door, hesitating with her hand on the knob. ‘And Dan?’
He looked over.
‘Just know that if you ever want to talk about… whatever it is, I’m here.’
For a second, his carefully neutral expression crumpled. The raw hurt in his eyes made her look away, tears pricking her own eyes. She turned, giving them both space. He recovered first.
‘So… what are you going to tell Mum?’
‘That you’re staying longer in New Zealand because you miss all the family, home-cooked meals and MacLeod’s Cove.’
‘Perfect. See you soon, Luce.’
‘Love you,’ she said as she closed the door.
And she did. So much so that she knew she wouldn’t leave it. A sad Dan was not someone she could live with and feel at peace.
Out in the street, about to get into her car, she glanced up at the apartment. She could just see a flash of his blond hair above the greenery on her balcony.
Good. He was right. It was peaceful up there, away from the world.
She hoped it would give him at least a little of the respite he was so obviously searching for.
There was nothing better than early summer at MacLeod’s Cottage, Lucy thought as she slammed the car door and looked around.
It had always calmed her, made her stop like nowhere else.
But in the last few years, as her mother had let the place slide, the comfort the cottage had given her had been tinged with sadness.
Not anymore. The ownership might still be a mystery, but Jen and Liam’s return seemed to have given her mother, Kate, a new lease of life.
Visitors no longer had to fight their way along the path, pushing back overgrown jasmine and thorny rose shoots.
Jen’s new-old love, Sam, had seen to that.
Kate had always kept the back garden in good order with vegetables and flowers, but she’d drawn a strange line at the front, as if she wanted the cottage to hide from the world.
As Lucy approached the front door, she laughed to see a small face pressed against one of the coloured panes of glass, followed by a shout and a disappearance. She opened the door — now, thankfully, not always kept locked — in time to hear Liam call out, ‘Mum, there’s a white lady at the door!’